To say bollocks during a funeral speech

[mrspk]

I'm thinking of saying a few words at my grandma's funeral and this was her favourite word which she was known for saying a lot. Would it be wrong to include it?

I think yanbu OP. As long as you think people there will understand why they may remember her with affection through the use of it.

Not at all. The service is about her. We spoke of my nan's penchant for calling people dirty tarts.

That made me chuckle yes of course say it everybody who loved her will know she was sweary I am sorry about your grandma she sounds great

Thanks, that's good to hear, I was thinking the vicar may be offended but I know my grandma would have loved someone to say bollocks!

No it’s crude and stupid and I
Doubt she’d actually want that to be a lasting statement on her .

I fuck. A lot. I say fuck. Ally.
I won’t give a fuck of course hit if they bang on about my penchant for fucks when I’m gone

I’m FUCKING HAUNTING the FUCKERS

I reckon it could raise a very welcome bittersweet laugh from everybody.

It sounds fine to me.

I went to a funeral where the deceased was buried with a box of roll-ups from another relative in his pocket. He was well known for being tight and bumming cigarettes rather than buying his own. Everyone loved this and it became a fond memory for the bereaved.

(For our non-UK readers: 'bumming cigarettes' isn't a sexual reference, it means asking to smoke other peoples.)

Do it! when my aunt died she had a long history with money problems but she always made a joke of it she honestly didn't give a shit. In her funeral speech her son said " she was a lovely mum and friend to many her door was open to everyone except brighthouse then she's not in" oh how everyone laughed.

For anyone who doesn't know who brighthouse is they offer items for extortionate fees until you pay them off x

Yanbu- everyone will have a little chuckle and that’s what a funeral speech needs!

Yeah but
It always feels like a joke ON the deceased

I think if it's done right, it's about acknowledging who they really were and showing love and appreciation for all of them.

My son gave a very irreverent eulogy at his friends funeral - because that's the kind of girl she was, funny, irreverent, mad as a box of frogs, and that's why we all loved her. The vicar laughed along with everyone else. She was also fiercly atheist, but her parents had wanted a church funeral, my DS talked about her atheism too - because it was an important part of her and he wanted people to appreciate that. Again - vicar not bothered.

So if you think your dear Grandma would have laughed - then say it, I think it is important to remember people as tey really were, no tine it down or change it just because you are in church.

When my DP died his best friend gave a eulogy that was more like a best man's speech. It was absolutely hilarious, I loved it. He really captured my DP's spirit and it really cheered me up on an awful day.

My colleague organised her dm's funeral and had an offensive slogan printed on the back page of the order of service. The saying was something her mum had frequently said. However other family members took offence and it did cause a rift. Personally there is no way I would have done what she did ! However saying Bollocks is fairly inoffensive in my opinion.

I know for sure that my grandma would have laughed her head off, and it's part of a story so is in context rather than saying it for the sake of it.

Depends on how you work it in but personally I wouldn't be offended by it.

Sorry for your loss

It's a question that you should be asking close relatives and also pre-warn them.

I expressed who my Mum was, partly by the music that I chose and it gave everyone a smile. My FIL's Family did the same.

My DD chose to read a poem she had written when she was 14 about my Mum, which had cheeky bits in it.

The Vicar won't be offended. I think, if possible, it should be ran past Family, first, though.

The vicar will have seen/heard of a lot worse!

I think as long as it's not said in a sexist, racist etc context and not mocking of the deceased, it's fair game, especially if it would have made your grandmother laugh.

There's nothing more depressing than a eulogy which talks about the deceased distantly and doesn't reflect their personality.

I went to a funeral where half the eulogy was made up of dirty limericks. The vicar looked slightly taken aback, but this person was known for telling them throughout their life. It raised some warm smiles and a few appropriate laughs 🙂. But do check with your family x

You've reminded me of John Cleese's . It's worth a watch.

The most disappointing eulogy I ever heard was by a relative that made it about them rather than the person who had died (making it all about religion when the deceased person hadn’t been involved with religion since childhood).

The best ones have been all about the person: their quirks and weaknesses as well as their strengths and achievements; what made them fun as well as their interests and hobbies; how they were throughout their lives, not just in old age. If bollocks was a favourite word, it should make people smile.

I'd probably mention it in a toast at the wake, rather than in the eulogy.

I would check with the vicar first!

I think as long as it's done with love and affection, it won't be offensive at all.

My friend's son made a couple of fart jokes at my friend's funeral, damn near brought the house down. Friend was a champion farter.

My MIl' brother told a fairly risque joke about her at her funeral. Got a few scandalised gasps but my dh and his siblings all had a good giggle- it was true! The people who matter will get it. The rest will have something to gossip about.