To want to punch my “colleagues” in the face

[Ebeneser]

I work in quite a large office. There are 21 people in here, 3 different groups. I am in the middle, on the “outskirts” of my group. The group I sit closest to therefore are not part of my group. There are 5 of them in total, and I hate every one of them (Alright, one guy is OK, unless you get stuck behind him in the car; he drives like a blind old granny).

The one I sit next to, well. She hums, talks to herself, raps her nails on the desk and violates my personal space with her paperwork. I not so subtly shove it back onto her desk regularly and she still does it. Don't even get me started on the way she eats.

The guy immediately behind me constantly clucks his tongue, raps his nails against the wall, whistles under his breath, clicks his pen and is just generally an annoying git. The guy next to him is similar, but not to such an irritating extent, although he regularly just watches videos on his phone with the volume up or takes facetime calls with his young daughter which deserves a slap in itself.

The guy opposite him has a really pathetic sneeze, and can be quite loud otherwise OK. Guy next to him is the OK one.
Oh, and 2 other people in the office are annoy the shit out of me as well. Tongue clicking and whistling.

I just want them to feck the feck off before I actually carry out my fantasies of inflicting grievous bodily harm on them.

It isn't misophonia to find other people's automatic noise-making intrusive. It's like teenage boys who kick the back of seats on planes, bang, bang, bang, and nobody tells them it's rude. Making unnecessary non-stop noise is intruding on everyone else in your vicinity. Your noise-making is more important than their comfort.

I live in a terraced house and don't mind noise coming from either side - it's never music, just the sound of people going up or down stairs, moving around or clattering and banging and hoovering, the sound of people living. That's completely different from having to sit for hours next to someone who's tapping or jiggling.

If I had to work surrounded by noisemakers like that I'd get something to play white noise, very loudly.

Here you go, OP 😁

mynoise.net/NoiseMachines/whiteNoiseGenerator.php

@viques I bet your heavy breathing, exaggerated sighs and loud tuts are driving them bonkers too. Try getting on with some work instead of glowering and huffing.

I don't actually do anything listed above, but if you think it would annoy them in return I would more than happily start.

Don't get me wrong, I can perfectly deal with the odd bit of pen clicking, tongue clucking etc throughout the day, but this is persistent. There is no respite (unless they are in a team meeting elsewhere or at lunch!).

There is an actual headphones ban at our work, otherwise I'd go down that route. Instead I just have to sit here (quietly!), trying to concentrate whilst thinking up various scenarios in which I can inflict them pain, 'cos I obviously can't do that in real life!

Wear earplugs, people can be annoying, all part of life's little challenges.

misophonia...

I've read up on this misophonia. I've even done this for a laugh:
www.allergictosound.com/articles/do-you-have-misophonia-take-the-test/
I had an equal number of A's & B's. I also just get irritated, rather than go into avoidance or panic mode. I very much doubt that I have Misophonia as those noises only irritate me when they are done constantly, I don't think I'd even notice otherwise.

Misokinesia, is another interesting one. I hate people that wiggle their feet constantly. I have to ensure I move myself so I can't see it. My family & friends know better than to sit there constantly wiggling their feet (although they will take the piss out of me for it). Thankfully I can't see what my colleagues do under their desks!

OP, I got mostly A's you amateur!! ;-)

@Monkeypuzzle32 I got all As which puts you towards the amateur end of the spectrum too...

Ps my ears now hurt just taking the test.

As i’m reading this there is someone on the bus behind me who must have one of those enormous packets of crisps, judging by how often they crinkle the packet then crunch with mouth open! It’s been going on FOREVER and they MUST DIE!!! But after the person tapping their metal ring on the metal bar next to me....

When are you leaving school Ebeneser?

I think everyone has quirks people find annoying. In my office there’s a guy who taps his foot a lot and another who sniffs (constantly). But I’m just as guilty - apparently I sigh for no reason quite a lot

My colleagues annoy me after lunch and Fridays rest of the time i can ignore them

Hello royal, spent my childhood and a good chunk of adult life irritationg people by sighing so much. Turns out is a form of asthma, that deep sigh that only other people really notice as youve got used to it. See your gp you may benefit from an inhaler.

OP I could have written this post myself. In my old team there was this young apprentice who would constantly sit there all day and just crack his knuckles, over and over again! At one point I felt like crying and had to go and stand in the loos a few times for a break because I really wanted to punch him! I even used to dread going into work because of it. Luckily, we had a restructure and he moved to a different team! It was only a few days after he left that the team leader said 'oh bless, he's a lovely lad but I'm so glad I don't have listen to him cracking his knuckles and longer', then lots of other people in the office laughed and agreed!

I also hate people tapping their feet too. My OH does it all the time and I'm constantly telling him not too. Can't stand watching TV and being distracted with this wiggly thing in the corner of my eye!

I also cannot stand throat and swallowing noises. Seriously, if you need to swallow fine but why be so loud about it?!

I'm a misophonia sufferer without a doubt!

2 options 1. Acquire a machine gun and eradicate the lot of them. 2. Find a new job.

No-one likes the sound of people breathing heavily, humming, tapping, or eating or coughing; it makes most people irate and anxious/tense/angry.

Misophonia is just another way to attempt to pathologise extremely common reactions and label them as a 'disorder'.

It's life. Other people do things we find irritating. A disorder is by it's very nature 'outside of the norm'. This isn't outside of the norm.

@longwayoff When are you leaving school Ebeneser?
Unfortunately I left school nearly 25 years ago, I’d love to be able to say next year 😂

@BlackeyedSusan , not sure whether to be jealous or not! ;-)

@longwayoff - that’s interesting (and kind of worrying!) never thought of it as an issue other than it peeves the guy I sit behind off a little

Royal, I wouldn't let it concern you too much, its never caused me a problem, just other people who often take it as a sign you're bored in theIr company or otherwise dissatisfied with them. You may notice you do it more in particular kinds of weather or if you exercise or play sport. Mention it next time you at gp. A brown inhaler - preventive inhaler - will help it.

I feel your pain op. That would drive me truly insane. Much better to work in a place filled with noise than one with irritating tics.