Name change for less potential of outing.
I live in a tenement flat, which for those of you outwith Scotland's central belt (or New York, I think), is a multi (3, sometimes 4)-storied block of flats, normally built from red or blonde sandstone, with a communal entrance. Most date back to Edwardian times in terms of construction, so are between 100-120+ years old.
Tenements have a bit of a bad rep as 'slum housing', but some (including where I live) are very lovely, with beautiful 'closes' (communal entrance corridors), elaborate staircases etc, and the flats themselves are often enormous (sometimes four or five-bedroomed).
Our lovely Edwardian tenement flat, in a lovely area, is very dear to us: it was the first house OH and I bought together (we got lucky, as impoverished entry-level graduates, and lived off beans for about a year to be able to afford it), and we've lived in it for more than 15 years. We love it, and we've worked very hard on it.
A couple of years ago, new neighbours moved into the bottom flat, which is a 'main door', i.e. it has a private front door separate to the close itself (although it's part of the common building).
Seemed nice people - retired professionals (ha, outing my inner snob), moving from the other side of the country to ours to support their family which lives nearby.
For the sake of brevity - I AM SO FCKING DONE WITH THEM. They've taken over over the whole bl*dy place, and I can't get a moment's peace.
One of the key principles of any kind of communal living is a mutual appreciation of each other's personal space, which they (as people who have formerly lived only in detached or terraced housing) just don't seem to get.
Living in a main door flat, they have their own front garden, which, given the time of year and weather we've been having, they're in from about 8am onwards. Now, I can't say I blame them: if I was retired and had my own space, I'd be using it as much as possible in the lovely weather, too.
However, every move invites comment:
8am - 'Oooh, is that you off to work then?' (No, I'm off to throw myself off a bridge, but I thought I'd dress up a bit, just to show the paramedics who dredged my sodden corpse out of the river a bit of respect, you know how it is)
6.30pm - 'Ooooh, you home from work, then?' (No, the paramedics got there too soon.)
(going to the bottle bank) - 'That's a lot of bottles, you got a bit of a problem there, eh? Wink wink nudge nudge!'
(parking my car, which is a bit of banger, anywhere near their shiny Audi tank) - 'Careful with that thing, can't afford to replace ours!'
...ad infinitum.
JESUS ACTUAL CHRIST. LET ME LEAVE AND RETURN TO MY OWN HOME AS AND WHEN I WANT TO. I'M ALMOST 40 YEARS OLD, AND BEING MONITORED LIKE A TEENAGER SNEAKING OFF TO A PARTY REALLY GETS ON MY T*TS.
However, the gist of this, and the basis of my rant, is that I no longer get to sit in the back garden - I know how this sounds, but if you've got this far, bear with me.
Tenements have communal 'back courts' for washing and bins, with some room for a wee lawn and some plants etc, and again, there's a general unspoken agreement that, unless you are all fantastically social, you 'take your turn', whether that's for hanging out washing, sitting out, using space for planting flowers or veg etc.
Anyway, said neighbours (did I mention they actually have their own garden at the front of their house?) have more or less taken this over, installing a deck, all their own plants, garden furniture etc. Admittedly, it's very nice, and it was very nice of them to do so, but nobody asked them to, and crucially, nobody agreed to it.
Their back window overlooks the space, so you can't sit there without somebody shouting down and/or coming out to join you.
As I sit here typing (I'm working from home today and it's hot, so the windows are open), I can hear them having yet ANOTHER f*cking barbecue with their adult children and grandchildren. They basically seem to live outdoors now. If I'm lucky, I might get half an hour in the shade at about 9pm when the sun has passed over.
This is such a ridiculous rant, and I know how many comments I'm going to get about having fundamentally 'nice' neighbours, compared to the horrors that so many endure, but I am SO FRUSTRATED, and short of moving (which, given the amount of time, money and effort we've poured into this house, I really don't want to do), I don't know what to do.
I'm a private and fairly introverted person, and I know that's my 'issue' to deal with, and it shouldn't impact on others. Conversely, I think I should be allowed to be a private, introverted person, within reason, which includes not feeling under siege in my own bl**dy house. I'm quite happy to share pleasantries, and even water plants and feed cats, but there are limits.
All I want to do is occasionally sit in my garden with a glass of wine in peace. Is that BU?
Well done if you've managed to get to the end of this without wanting to remove your own face with your fingernails. 