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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU? School says sports day on Saturday is compulsory

457 replies

weekendsareforfamily · 03/07/2018 14:55

My son is in year one, so second sports day now. Last year it was scheduled on a Saturday but the weather was bad so was cancelled and rearranged for a Tuesday afternoon. This year it is planned for this coming Saturday. My boy has a swimming lesson from 09:30, the children have to be in school for 09:00.
On the FB group chat someone has asked whether they have to go as they are working and cannot get the child to school. The receptionist has replied saying yes as its a compulsory day and we have all known about this since September last year.
Now I was planning on popping into the reception to say my boy wouldn't make it because he's swimming but now I am worried I will be told tough and that I knew about this so should be bringing him in. I am worried I will be fined if he doesn't attend but it's a Saturday?! Do I tell the truth and risk a fine? Do I lie and make up another reason? Do I lose out on the money I have already paid for his swimming lessons (we have already lost out on two from going away at last half term)? Arrrgh
WWYD? Thanks

OP posts:
HelenaDove · 04/07/2018 02:03

Sunny It sounds to me like you were watching Prizzis Honor on Talking Pictures TV on Sunday night.

So im sure you heard one of the characters say "Hes about 50% too dumb to be a Prizzi.

Well you are about 50% too dumb to be a teacher.

You seem to be living out some sort of fantasy on here.

Topseyt · 04/07/2018 02:37

Sunny, school sports days are NOT fun.

They are sacrilege. Forced jollity, false smile pasted on. Ritual humiliation of those who are not sporty.

With very little respect, you are talking through your arse.

Flyawaypeterflyawaypaul · 04/07/2018 04:08

@mrsm43s ‘it’s part of being committed to your school’.
Goodness me, where to your dc attend, the hogwarts school of whitchcraft and wizardry?

Op - school don’t get to dictate what happens to your son past 3.30pm on a Friday afternoon (age appropriate homework excluded).
Tell them that family time and Persuing his swimming hobby is more important.

Bibesia · 04/07/2018 07:02

Children can be committed to their school during school hours. At weekends, they should be committed to their homes, families and friends.

my2bundles · 04/07/2018 07:35

Bibesia well said. Although in sunnys world you are only allowed to show support and commitment to school 😉

VanillaSugar · 04/07/2018 07:42

If sports day is this coming Saturday then there is no chance that any one will turn up when England are playing Sweden.

VanillaSugar · 04/07/2018 07:43

I mean, the school will have known about the World Cup for 4 years....

Roomba · 04/07/2018 08:07

My son's (state) school has four or five compulsory Saturday attendances throughout the year. These are for open day, speech day, founder's day, compulsory Christmas Service attendance and so on. Everyone is aware of these in advance and if you don't attend without reason (illness for example) it does go down as an unauthorised attendance. Perfectly legal, they have 4/5 fewer days in school over the year to compensate for it. Mind you they also give out Saturday detentions which are compulsory.

kirkandpetal · 04/07/2018 08:12

FFS, it's a one off day, that potentially is lots of fun, which has prob taken quite a bit of organisation to set up. Most kids love sports day and I think it's nice they're doing it on a Sat to give most parents a chance to attend.

Our sports day is on a Wed which is fine for me, but lots of my kids friends parents can't get time off work so miss it, and they're gutted and feel like they're missing out.

Missing one swimming lesson is not a big deal. You've had notice for a year that sports day is this particular day, suck it up. YABU.

LuluJakey1 · 04/07/2018 08:21

My children are in the Independent sector, and have compulsory sports fixtures most weekends (and quite a few evening events too) - indeed they're most disappointed if they don't make the teams and so don't have a fixture! Compulsory concerts and music events on weekend and evenings too, along with a host of other co-curriculars. They are proud to attend. I can see why state schools fail to offer the same enrichment and sporting opportunities as Indys, if this is the attitude of the parents

No, really! Gosh there's an idea that might catch on in the state sector. Why have we never thought of that- after school and Saturday fixtures and teams, musical events in the evenings, drama production rehearsals and evening performances. What on earth have our PE, Drama and Music staff all been doing! I must tell DH so he can rush i to his school today and get them all onto this amazing idea.

It has to qualify as the most patronising, snotty post ever.

LuluJakey1 · 04/07/2018 08:32

For a school to be successful, you have to have parents and staff working together rather than against each other, as seems to be the case with many parents on this thread.

Even a few parents behaving like this can really damage the ethos and atmosphere of a school. Which is why they have to be taken out.

Sunny should really be Secretary of State for Education with all of her revolutionary batshit thinking- she would cause more damage than Gove. I am wondering what exactly her methods for having parents 'taken out' would be.

gekiort · 04/07/2018 08:34

My children are in the Independent sector, and have compulsory sports fixtures most weekends (and quite a few evening events too) - indeed they're most disappointed if they don't make the teams and so don't have a fixture! Compulsory concerts and music events on weekend and evenings too, along with a host of other co-curriculars. They are proud to attend. I can see why state schools fail to offer the same enrichment and sporting opportunities as Indys, if this is the attitude of the parents

This just makes me feel very sad for your children. Not only because of the activities, but your attitude is horrible.

Sirzy · 04/07/2018 08:39

I work with the school every day, literally we so extra communication every day just so ds can access education. However if they tried to make attending on a Saturday compulsory they would very politely be told ds wouldn’t be attending and they can mark that however they wish on their register. He needs his weekends to “recharge” after a week of stress at school

Willow2017 · 04/07/2018 08:43

I am wondering what exactly her methods for having parents 'taken out' would be.

AIBU? School says sports day on Saturday is compulsory
my2bundles · 04/07/2018 09:16

Roomba out of curiosity how does school make Saturday detention compulsory? It would be impossible for lots of kids to attend, visitation rights of a parent during the weekend us one that springs to mind. Thus is often by court order and affects more children than people realise, and many children have to travel to other parts of the country for this to happen. There are of course many other reasons why a child could not attend a Saturday detention. If my own child was given one he would not be attending due to circumstances.

Roomba · 04/07/2018 09:38

Honestly? I don't know, my son has never had one. And I understand they are given out very rarely. My friend worked in DS's school for a few months and said it was the easiest teaching job she ever had as all the boys just did exactly as they were asked most of the time - she was most confused at first, having come from a very challenging school beforehand! DS says one boy in his class got a Saturday detention recently - he had had several after school detentions that he hadn't turned up for first apparently.

But there are loads of boys at the school every Saturday, taking part in various sports clubs, competing in events, doing cadets and other clubs voluntarily. Being in school on a Saturday isn't an alien concept, whether it is actually enforceable I don't know though (unlike the dates which are actually counted as term dates and everyone must attend).

my2bundles · 04/07/2018 09:45

Roomba, attending clubs on a Saturday which hire rooms/facilities in a school is not he same as attending school n a Saturday. Many organisations and clubs hire school Halls in the same way they hire other facilities elsewhere, you carnt really compare that t compulsory school on a Saturday.

Forflipssake2 · 04/07/2018 09:53

@lardymclardy
I don't know about you, but when I've been in some tricky situations I've never wished I had a sack so I could climb in it and hop off at 'speed GrinGrinGrin*

runningkeenster · 04/07/2018 09:56

It has to qualify as the most patronising, snotty post ever

Quite.

Who knew that state school kids didn't, for example, compete at the English Schools athletics championships (which are at weekends, for the avoidance of doubt).

FrayedHem · 04/07/2018 10:30

DS1's secondary do Saturday detentions, but it's the 7th stage out of 8 for sanctions and the 8th stage is an exclusion.

drspouse · 04/07/2018 11:11

I suspect that Roomba and I may be referring to the same school.

Squidgee · 04/07/2018 11:42

My DS doesn't participate in sports day either way, I have to attend as I have to sit with him on the field as the teachers are occupied with the other students.. I also go to watch DD.

Still wouldn't go on a Saturday for the same reasons as Sirzy, and every other weekend is their dads contact time.

BertrandRussell · 04/07/2018 12:42

I would certainly would have done my best to get my children to a Saturday sports day- partly because they always loved sports day and partly because I think if someone puts effort into setting something up you should try and support them if at all possible. But sporty children usually have outside school sports on a Saturday- even state school children, who, contrary to popular belief, don't spend all their out of school hours playing Grand Theft Auto and drinking coke.....

Roomba · 04/07/2018 14:19

@drspouse - yes, I believe we are referring to the same school Grin. I've never heard anyone complaining about the compulsory Saturdays, it's just a few times a year and two of them at least are only a half day really. It's not every week. I assume those with court ordered contact time work around it just the same as they would if their child had any other activity to attend on a Sat/Sun (friend's birthday party, going out shopping with friends, football match against another school, swimming lesson, tickets to a concert...). You can't tell me that children who have court ordered contact therefore refrain from making any plans outside that parent's home until the day they turn 18, surely?

Roomba · 04/07/2018 14:23

My son couldn't attend his school's compulsory Open Day this year (on a Saturday, all students required to attend and help out/show round etc). It clashed with a LAMDA exam he had with Stagecoach. I let school know, they said no problem and marked it as an authorised absence (not sure which code they used). His friend was competing in a national sporting tournament 200 miles away - again, he was excused, just as he would have been if it were on a Wednesday.