AIBU? School says sports day on Saturday is compulsory

[weekendsareforfamily]

My son is in year one, so second sports day now. Last year it was scheduled on a Saturday but the weather was bad so was cancelled and rearranged for a Tuesday afternoon. This year it is planned for this coming Saturday. My boy has a swimming lesson from 09:30, the children have to be in school for 09:00.
On the FB group chat someone has asked whether they have to go as they are working and cannot get the child to school. The receptionist has replied saying yes as its a compulsory day and we have all known about this since September last year.
Now I was planning on popping into the reception to say my boy wouldn't make it because he's swimming but now I am worried I will be told tough and that I knew about this so should be bringing him in. I am worried I will be fined if he doesn't attend but it's a Saturday?! Do I tell the truth and risk a fine? Do I lie and make up another reason? Do I lose out on the money I have already paid for his swimming lessons (we have already lost out on two from going away at last half term)? Arrrgh
WWYD? Thanks

[twoshedsjackson]

I hated Sports Day as a child,(weekday afternoon) I hated it when I was a teacher, even when it was during the normal school week. Then I moved to the indie sector and had to go in on a Saturday, and most of my colleagues (those with a life outside school, basically) harboured the suspicion that some of the Saturday events entailed avoidance of the nitty-gritty of home life on the part of those with the clipboard. Turning out at the weekend to pursue your passion for a given sport is a whole different ball-game (excuse the pun).
Saturdays can be problematic for other reasons as well. The best known one would be observant Jews, but could also be Seventh Day Adventists. When I was still in the state sector, we had to gracefully accept that our best netball player was not available for Saturday tournaments for that very reason. Children of mixed heritage may well be attending Saturday schools (eg Polish, Chinese) where their parents are making a commendable effort to keep them in touch with their heritage. If you raise some of these issues with the school, you will earn the gratitude of many teachers as well as non-sporty children!

[Icanttakemuchmore]

If you can't go for a reason then don't take your child. It's a Saturday and not a school day. What can they possibly do?? Nothing.

[OwlinaTree]

Did you go OP?

[Bibesia]

Surely that's an assumption on your part. MY DS isn't at all sporty but loves the rest of the day hanging out with his friends.

But it's equally an assumption by you, Pitter, that OP's child will be allowed to "hang out" with his friends. Schools that run the competitive type of sports day tend to make children sit where they are put, which may or may not be with their friends, and to insist they at least appear to pay attention to the races rather than chatting to their mates. Plus, of course, it's much more fun hanging out with your friends at home or another venue of choice than getting into school or PE uniform and sitting on a hot school sports field.

[Mrseft]

@BitOutOfPractice actually I may not. So I'm determined to enjoy what I can of my kids experiences while I can, and haven't the opportunity to miss them cuz there will always be more.

[Heatherjayne1972]

Why are school assuming parents can bring children in on a Saturday?
Some will be with the other parent
Some parents actually work weekends too!

Mine would not be going simply because I couldnt physically get them there

• don’t make any difference how much notice is given

[BitOutOfPractice]

Ain't you the Pollyanna?

Seriously, you've got some great experiences ahead of you with parenting. And some shit times too. Trust me, some sports days will be great, some will make you want to cry. But painting them with rosy colour wash and being aghast that not everyone adores them, based on one experience is a bit galling.

I'm sure I will have a lovely summer now my primary sports day years are behind me!

[Mrseft]

@bitoutofpractice if I’m still here in 15 years I’ll be happy just to be here. Have a great summer with your family 🙂

[BitOutOfPractice]

@Mrseft like I say, come back in 15 years and tell me how wonderful sports day is when it's 4 hours sitting on a hard chair in the blazing sun, by yourself because nobody else in the family wants to gone or can get time off, just to watch your dc crying because they've come last in the only 40 second event they've been picked for. Then rinse and repeat for subsequent children. And Then tell me what a wonderful community event it is.

[nikki23861]

Are you kidding me? It's a Saturday, I wouldn't even give it a second thought, there's no way id send my child to school on the weekend! complain to the school its a joke, they have 5 days every week to arrange a sports day.

[NotClear]

Haven't RTFT, so sorry if this has been covered.

But. 2 things.

1. What does your dc want to do?
2. Are they giving you a day off in he week to pay for coming on saturday? If not, and if dc isn't hankering to go, it's an automatic no from me!

[PitterPatterOfBigFeet]

An awful lot of assumptions there. If it is the traditional type of sports day with lots of organised races, it's not fun for anyone not involved in the races

Surely that's an assumption on your part. MY DS isn't at all sporty but loves the rest of the day hanging out with his friends.

[my2bundles]

To the poster Reno dissent nderstand because her nursery age child loved sports day. My son also loved his nursery sports day when it was 15 minutes of climbing over an obstacle course. Fast forward 6 years and it's now 3 hours of relentless races in the hear which he is no good at, it's demoralising. He is n a club fir his chosen sport which he lives but sports days are long, boring and demoralising. Long gone are the days of nursery fun everyone's a winner have a sticker and ice lolly sports days.

[runningkeenster]

For goodness sake - change the swimming lesson and let your kid be part of the school activity

You can't change swimming lessons, they take place at set times!!!!

[runningkeenster]

Why should you prevent him from being involved in what is a fun activity, part of normal school life

Since when have sport days been fun?

[PitterPatterOfBigFeet]

Unless he really really didn't want to go (if he would feel self conscious in front of his friends?) I would just take him. It doesn't sound like a big deal to miss one swimming lesson (if it was a family wedding or something I would obviously not go). It's usually a nice day even if they're not sporty. I always try and support the school and having a good relationship with them has been helpful when I've needed their extra support.

[Mrseft]

@kingkiller my daughters school have a pretty good balance, all the kids compete for their houses and each place wins points in a race, whichever house wins the most points wins the house cup. Competitive but not personal which I think is great.

[Mrseft]

@BitOutOfPractice I’m not even particularly sporty. Seemed more to be about the whole school having a chance to be together and be a community doing something. Everyone caught up and enjoyed watching the kids run some races. Sometimes you don’t actively enjoy things for the subject they are about (ie. sports) but still get other things from them. That’s the point in a community event isn’t it?

[Kingkiller]

I get that it's a difficult balance though. You can't just get rid of the competitive element altogether. Some kids love it and may want to do it professionally etc.

[compstruck]

Kingkiller, couldn't agree more. It should be about being social as well.

[compstruck]

couldn't agree more. It should be about being social as well.

[compstruck]

I think things are too serious now. Where are we with sports day these days? Does the winner get recognition as first place or is it still the silly non-recognition that "everybody wins for taking part" attitude? Or has it turned to be over-competitive now? It seems to go in different cycles. When I was young it was fun, competitive but not overly so. I looked forward to the ice-cream treat and drink more but it did us no harm. But that was in school time one afternoon.

If mother's races have become yummy mummy slingback totterings to compete to boast about the latest heels/nikes/glamourwear, where's the fun in that?

If I were the OP I would take him to swimming then turn up, albeit late, and apologise for being late, something urgent cropped up, and let him join in with his friends if he wants. Traffic's bad on a Saturday so you may be late anyway. Are parents encouraged to hang around and talk? If it's not casual and is too competitive and your child isn't, then it doesn't sound fun. I think the idea of sports day is obviously exercise but also to teach children that there are winners and losers in life and that the more effort you try and put in, the better the results. Like exams really. My sister is a TA but often has had to replace teachers teaching classes and much more for no extra pay and do outside hours additional classes too. She often hasn't got home until after 7pm and then had family and aging parents to see are ok.

To make it fun and exciting takes a special type of TA/Teacher. I'm amazed at the lengths my sister has gone too sometimes. Even on residentials. Pupils and families should want to attend and look forward to it, not dread it. Good luck, I hope you enjoy the day whatever you decide to do. Just don't forget the suncream, water and hats!

[Kingkiller]

My unsporty 12 yo dd was dreading sports day. To my astonishment she came home and said "It was the best (school) day ever!!! Well... apart from the brief bits where I actually had to do any sport!" It was largely sitting about in the sunshine chatting to her friends.

Sport in schools is problematic, imo. There are a surprising number of PE teachers who still only seem to care about the sporty kids and ones in teams and can barely conceal their scorn at unsporty ones. (I ssy this as a teacher myself - I've worked with many PE teachers like this.) They should be encouraging exercise for health for all, not implying that if you can't compete then you might as well not bother. PE lessons and sports days put some people off exercise for life.

[Getoffthetableplease]

I hated sports day as a child, my friends too, my teachers clearly hated it, my parents didn't enjoy it, my children don't enjoy it, their friends don't enjoy it, I don't enjoy going, my husband finds excuses not to come, the teachers don't seem to enjoy it, the other parents don't seem to enjoy it, my teacher friends all absolutely hate it...from what I've seen it's only ever the person with a megaphone that looks to have a genuine smile on the day.

Just do away with it already misses point

[BitOutOfPractice]

I don’t get it, our nursery aged daughter loved her sports day

@Mrseft You don't get that not all families and kids like the same thing? Really?

Also, wait till you've been doing them for 15 years. It wears mighty thin. especially when you have non-sporty kids