To send DD to nursery?

[LookWhosHavingKittens]

I think I may be U.

DD has slowly come down with something over Friday and this weekend. I'm in a position where I really need to be in work for reasons I won't go into, DH is away on a course and I have no one to look after DD. Her temp is 37.9 and she's coughing and sneezing. I was sure it was just a cold but now not so sure because of temperature but has been teething for a while now. I need nursery to check her temperature during the day and administer medication if temp present. Would you send your DC? And would your nursery take them? Mine seems to have a generic policy which doesn't mention specifically when they will and won't take them.

I can see why you're considering it - and the pressure to go to work is why so many people do send their children in even when they're sick (also because we are so used to going in to work ourselves even when we have a cold or something). But it's not a good thing and does mean sickness spreads more than it otherwise would. If you are really desperate to go into work and have no family or friends there are some nanny agencies who provide cover for just this sort of thing - but I think they normally only operate in big cities. A possible alternative might be a responsible 18 year old who has just finished A levels, if you know any.

meanwhile, back in the real world, for cough cold and slight temp, give them inbruprofen and send them in. it was far more acceptable if the nursery called to pick them up than if you just didnt go to work.
clearly i live in a parallel universe again.

No comment about the nursery thing as you've said you'll keep her at home. I've spent my life looking after children, I'm a nursery nurse. I have to agree with a doctor, who told me "The only thing children get from teething is teeth". Children are teething for around two years, and in that time they will get coughs, colds and other infections.....nothing to do with the fact that coincidentally, they are producing teeth!

Nursery wont take her op and certainly ont check her temp and give her medicine unless its antibiotics etc. Its not their job. Can someone else have her if not im afraid you cant work. Sending her to nursery is cruel on her and the other children and if nursery did accept her you probably be called in to take her home. Can you work from home

Pixie Yes, I will have to do that. Thank you.

Kind of aside from my OP, just something I'm curious about really in relation to these replies and not asking for advice - if a nursery or other childcare provider accepts children whilst ill then you run the risk of your child potentially getting ill frequently, surely? Would you as a working parent look for a provider that specifically doesn't take children who are ill?

If her temp is 37.9 this early, it might be higher later, and she might get even more poorly.
I don't think it's a good idea to send her to nursery, though I also understand that it's really difficult to take day off work. It's creating a vicious circle. She will get better in few days, then another who caught from her gets ill, and spread it back to her.

It is hard when as a family you need to work and dc are ill. It's not selfish wanting to provide for them and I strongly feel work places should be more accommodating of emergency leave. I'm lucky and can work from home or go to office in the middle of the night.

Hope your lil one is better soon.

I doubt the nursery have a policy of taking ill children I think the problem from the nursery's side is that drop off time can be a whirlwind and many parents do drop and run knowing their child is a bit under the weather. Nursery staff don't have the time to assess each child as soon as they come in so they end up with sick children in whatever their policy. Yes it's frustrating (and why some posters are being so harsh I think) when your child catches it but it seems to be part of life and not something you can move your child away from. They do develop immunity though.

Children mixing is always open to germs spreading. A dc can go yo nursery fine and become I'll whilst there and infect 1/2 the room before anyone really realises. I think from my view point to send a dc who is already ill perhaps doesn't aid a speedy recovery, does affect other dc and often you only get to work to be called to pick them up which is often more inconvient than just staying at home in the first place.

Please don't keep her of nursery with a cough and a cold!other wise she will spend the whole of the winter off. Tell nursery she has had a bit of a temp over the weekend and they will keep a close eye on her.

The nursery I work at will phone parent if child has a temp asked to administer Calpol and if temp has not gone down after half an hour phone parent back to collect. If child is miserable, upset and unsettled then nursery will ask that parent collects. Alot of the time children perk up after Calpol

Can I ask do all the people who have said keep her off with a cough and sneezing keep their child off school with these symptoms?
My child has colds every other week during winter if I kept them off they would get behind in school

Well I’d send mine in. Sounds like they have a cold and a v mild temp. Unless horribly clingy/upset then I’d give some nurofen and send in. DS has been in Nursery since he was 4 months old and only been off once. It’s normal for kids to be sent in with viral stuff, particularly in the winter. I don’t think I’m being selfish, I’m just balancing the needs of my child (who would be well cared for at Nursery) and my job. If I don’t turn up to work, 5 patients would have their operations that they’ve been waiting months for, cancelled.

OP what's her temp now a few hours later? Playing devils advocate here- when you say she was sick. Was she sick as in she suddenly vomited a whole bottle up, or was she coughing and a little sicky?

@AJPTaylor 100% my experience as well, esp at 37.9, and that's with a very flexible employer.
Obviously for d&v, major illness like chicken pox then nursery is 100% not an option, but even then ime working parents send children back earlier than those who have a parent at home/family nearby who are happy to be on tap childcare etc.

Would you as a working parent look for a provider that specifically doesn't take children who are ill?
I work in healthcare. I expect my child to get ill at daycare, colds, sick bugs etc. And I expect that as a result my partner and I will catch at least some of them and also get sick. But she will get sick at some point whether she catches illness now at daycare or later at school. IMO its part of her growing up and building an immune system, it has to happen at some point.
My LO has been in daycare about a month now, she has had 2 colds lasting around 3 weeks now already (and currently has a horrifically runny nose of a bright green colour :p ). My daycare said they had no issues with her being in with them as long as she didn't have a fever or is wanting extra TLC and that the children get sick so often with colds it isn't a problem to them.
I would be very angry if someone was allowed to let a child into daycare who had something worse e.g. chickenpox

meanwhile, back in the real world, for cough cold and slight temp, give them inbruprofen and send them in.

And just when I was starting to think I was the only one who was thinking this...

The child has a cold, not some tropical flesh eating disease. Her temperature may be a bit up because it’s a bit hot at night he moment. Do you have the option to go over to her nursery at lunchtime to give her some calpol if needed?

I work in a nursery and I would expect parents to only keep children off if obviously poorly
A cough, cold or slightly raised temperature isn't really poorly
I would monitor and ring if I thought a child would be better off at home, or needed to see a docotor
But I'm also a working parent so know how hard it is to balance it and will only send home if I really need to
A lot of our parents are teachers or work at the hospital so they can't work from home

People are being really horrible to you on here. I've taken time off with my dd before and a dose of calpol and she's been running rings around me by lunchtime! However I do think you will have to take the day off. If your employer doesn't understand maybe it's time to find another job. Don't let people on here get to you though.

I don't think you will find a nursery who will take ill children nor one with a policy not to take them.
I think they would refuse if it was obvious the child was contagious.
I can sympathise OP, we didn't have cover when dc were little, so we had to have a sahp.
It's unfair to an employer to take time off for an ill child, it plays havoc with business if there's nobody to cover the employees work.
You have to/ should want to put your child first.

If I was feeling ill- even if it was “just” a cold - the last place I’d want to be is at work, surrounded by noise and lively people.
I would want to be at home, wearing my pyjamas, with the opportunity to recuperate in peace and nap as needed. And I’m an adult.
Why on earth would you even consider making your poor child go to nursery?? Surely she comes first.
Oh and don’t even get me started on the selfishness of spreading it to all the other children.

Then who looks after all the other kids when their off sick

“Why on earth would you even consider making your poor child go to nursery?? Surely she comes first.”

Because providing materially for you children is part of putting them first and sometimes you have to be a grown up and make hard decisions about long term benefits over short term ones, just as you do when you consider whether to go to work with a cold even though it would be nicer to laze around at home.

muddling

So parents have working parents to thank for sending their dc back too soon. Good to know where people's priorities are.

i reiterate.
if i kept my dc off nursery with a cough and a cold and a minimally raised temp, i would barely have gone to work for months at a time.
obviously ill/distressed or sick bug they stayed at home and i took unpaid leave.

@gillybeanz if you read what I wrote it says earlier not too soon.
I.e my child's chicken pox are all scabbed over and my child feels fine they go straight back to school whereas a sahp in MY experience might keep their child off again because it's Friday tomorrow & then the weekend just to make sure they are 110%.
D&v absolutely keep them off. Coughs & colds no chance.

If I was feeling ill- even if it was “just” a cold - the last place I’d want to be is at work, surrounded by noise and lively people.
I would want to be at home, wearing my pyjamas, with the opportunity to recuperate in peace and nap as needed. And I’m an adult.

Then you’re very lucky to with somewhere that has a generous enough sickness policy that they don’t mind you being off with a cold. A lot of people could lose money or be heading towards a disciplinary if they’re off every other minute for minor ailments