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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask (TW compulsive behaviours) if any other MNers experience dermatillomania?

55 replies

YesSheCan · 28/06/2018 21:30

Having an anxiety flare and after a long time (several months) of not picking the skin on my face, I started again tonight and have made a big mess. Basically, part of my anxiety can involve compulsive skin picking. I was doing really well having made my own fiddle toys to break the habit but recently got a tiny premenstrual spot on cheek, one of those deep sore ones, and have succombed to squeezing the absolute shit out of it. Put a hydrocolloid dressing on it couple of days ago and it was almost healed then I prodded it tonight and there was still a sore 'core' to it so - sorry about this and don't ever do this to your skin in case any sensible person would - I stuck a pin into the 'blocked pore' repeatedly to 'get out the crap' (I perceive there to be a load of yucky gunk in there that I 'need' to remove then it will all be fixed. Of course, this is an overvalued idea and all I do is make a horrible weeping sore on my face that takes weeks to heal and it's so hard to leave it alone once it's there). Guess I'm just looking for someone to tell me they've had this and permanently kicked the habit. I'm not a drug or alcohol addict but this damn skin picking feels like an addiction and I've relapsed again.

OP posts:
Mammalamb · 28/06/2018 21:32

Hi, I have similar on the scalp instead of face. Perhaps you should visit the GP for help with anxiety. Do you also have OCD? X

Original poster
YesSheCan · 28/06/2018 21:38

Hey, thanks. I have generalised anxiety disorder, am on SNRI medication, have sought online help for compulsive skin picking. I don't have OCD per se but do have some obsessive/compulsive traits when my anxiety gets bad. Have had quite a stressful time lately so that's probably why this has happened. I'm actually a GP myself but see my own GP re my anxiety when I need to. Sadly the chronic skin picking is something that most GPs would not know how to deal with and there is not widely available specific psychological therapy for it available on the NHS. I confessed to a GP at my surgery about it once when I had to go in because I'd caused an infection on my face that needed antibiotics. He totally dismissed me. And even a GP who would take it seriously would be limited in the provision they could refer you on to, unfortunately. And I'm sure it's a more common problem than is diagnosed.

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BristolThenSome · 28/06/2018 21:41

Have you tried watching Dr Pimple popper on youtube/instagram - helps ALOT of people stop skin picking .
(Doesnt help me stop, but makes me feel better about my 'teenage-skin' that I'm too old for)

Original poster
YesSheCan · 28/06/2018 21:42

Why yes I have! So grossly satisfying. Unfortunately just end up thinking 'must get one of those probe things that bring the head to the surface'

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Original poster
YesSheCan · 28/06/2018 21:44

And yeah, I'm feeling the 'too old for teenage skin'. When I was a teenager my skin was so great and I didn't appreciate it. Since mid 30s, seem to get hormonal pustules and wiry chin hairs, yuck

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Sofiathefirst2346 · 28/06/2018 21:49

Yes me. I pick and pick and pick. Also scratch my head til it bleeds so I can then pick the resulting scabs. Anxiety and boredom make it worse. I’ll also pull out my little toenails from the root if I’m in a really bad picking zone. I’ve got no idea how to stop it.

Sofiathefirst2346 · 28/06/2018 21:50

Unfortunately I have a rare condition that makes serious skin infections very likely...people have died from it. Still doesn’t stop me.

SluttyButty · 28/06/2018 21:51

There's a name for what I used to repeatedly until I got my skin under control? I thought I was a weirdo compulsively picking and squeezing my face. However for some reason I'm back to doing it on my shoulders and back, no idea why.

ToastyFingers · 28/06/2018 21:52

I'd like to tentatively raise my hand here.
I bite and pick all the skin at the tips of my fingers. Particularly if I'm feeling anxious. Also my toes if I'm in private. I do it to blemishes too but luckily don't get many.

LadyGrey66 · 28/06/2018 21:54

Hi OP - so sorry to hear you're going through this, it's such a difficult behaviour to control/stop and to be honest I would describe it as being an addiction. I suffered with this intermittently (along with hair pulling) since my early teens, mainly on my head and arms. Last year during a stressful period it got so bad that I'd made a weeping sore on my head, which then got infected. I decided that I needed to stop before I really injured myself, and found a CBT counsellor who had worked with the issue before. Initially we worked on breaking the link between the trigger and picking and creating barriers to it (awareness of when it was most likely to happen, distraction techniques, wearing gloves etc) then worked on identifying the underlying causes and addressing them. I had about seven sessions overall and it's completely changed my whole life - sometimes (rarely) I still get the urge to pick but I can control it, and then it's gone. I agree that it's probably far more common than generally acknowledged. Would counselling be an option for you?

Littlepond · 28/06/2018 21:56

I pick the skin on my fingers. And my lips. My lips are awful because I’m constantly pulling skin off them. My hands are horrible because they are covered in scabs, scars, and hard skin. It’s a real issue and I can’t stop doing it. I moisturise my hands a lot in the hope it’ll help but they are just awful.

It’s an anxiety thing for me largely.

NobodysMot · 28/06/2018 21:57

I do this to a couple of spots on my scalp. I have them bald and have to arrange my hair artfully. Don't think it's obvious, but ....... I want to stop.

My hand just keeps going to the spots to touch them Confused a thousand times a day. I cannot stop.

NobodysMot · 28/06/2018 21:59

I just googled the term and read a few good tips. I'm going to try the one to have a necklace with something heavy hanging off it. And some nail art that has a rough surface.

Original poster
YesSheCan · 28/06/2018 22:01

Oh Sofia the little toenails, agggh! Yes, there is a name for it. Helps to know your triggers. Mine are stress and tiredness and having a spot to pick. Had got in fairly well under control after the worst episode last January when I did it so bad that my face swelled up like Pob (80s kids TV, anyone?) and I had to pack the wound for weeks until it healed, now have permanent scar. This scared me into 'never doing it again' so I'm pretty angry with myself for starting again this evening. However, at least I stopped rather than having an hour plus session in the bathroom so suppose that's progress.
When I was quitting the last time, I made myself a bracelet of the spare buttons from clothes I had (never chuck those out) and constantly fiddled with them to keep hands busy. Also fidget spinners can help, or squishies. Am reinstating my 'I deserve to heal' mantra.

OP posts:
Original poster
YesSheCan · 28/06/2018 22:07

Good ideas Nobodysmot. I hang my bracelet off a necklace now as realised it didn't stop me putting hand up to face if on my wrist.

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Original poster
YesSheCan · 28/06/2018 22:10

So glad to hear you had a good counsellor and CBT helped you, ladygrey. Yes, when I have got my house move done and things have settled down a bit, I think I'll refer myself to CBT. I've had therapy regarding other stuff but not this, and reckon there are still things I need to sort out that therapy could help with.

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Original poster
YesSheCan · 28/06/2018 22:17

To you others who've said you do it and feel it's due to being anxious...I know I said GPs don't know much about chronic skin picking (we don't, because as trainees it's not something we get taught about, or at least my cohort didn't back 15-odd yrs ago) but if the underlying problem could be anxiety, defo go and see your GP about that because there is treatment. And it's worth going about the skin picking too because even if your GP doesn't know how to deal with it, you can ask them for a CBT referral.

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NobodysMot · 28/06/2018 22:20

I think it's habit for me now. I was in an abusive relationship but I met him 18 years ago and left him 11 years ago. Not that the first few years after I left him weren't mindblowingly awful but........... I do believe it's a habit I cannot break now.

NobodysMot · 28/06/2018 22:20

I may look in to CBT

Original poster
YesSheCan · 28/06/2018 22:32

Nobodysmot I'm sure you can break the habit. It's so common to have to make several attempts at quitting a habit before you finally succeed (that's what I keep telling myself anyway!) Sounds like it may be a stress coping mechanism for you maybe. CBT is definitely worth a go. (I've got to try it myself now, haven't I?!) Flowers

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Trulymadlymotherly · 28/06/2018 22:35

I do this to my arms and shoulders. I have keratosis pilaris and that’s very satisfying to squeeze. It’s also easier to hide. The only reason I don’t pick my face is that the skin is fairly clear.

It’s definitely triggered by anxiety, as is my compulsive overeating. Interestingly I’m a doctor too (a&e though). Never seen my own gp about any of this. Probably should....

newsparklythings · 28/06/2018 22:36

Yes for a few decades, my facial skin is very scarred Sad

duffinthemule · 28/06/2018 22:38

I do this to my scalp and it’s caused by anxiety. See your doctor and try to get some support as it will probably be linked to deeper issues.

MrJohnReese · 29/06/2018 06:17

Another picker here Blush Scalp is worst for me but also feet and anywhere with a spot or something to pick. 4 years ago was worst time and had a huge bald patch. For some reason it's started up again quite badly last couple of months. Really want to stop

speakout · 29/06/2018 06:22

Marking for later