Seething! DD ignored by hoops teacher

[babycham75]

After seeing The Greatest Showman, DD (10) wanted to start doing aerial hoops. We found a local class and the first few weeks were great.
Due to work commitments I haven't been able to take her so my mum has taken her the last two weeks.
There are never more than 6 in the class.
Apparently, the last two weeks, the teacher has spent practically the whole hour simpering and flirting with the father of one of the little girls, and giving her far more help and attention.
DD loves going but has come home disappointed tonight. She didn't get any help or encouragement. Can't help but think this is how it's going to continue. Any advice?

First go and witness it for yourself. I don't disbelieve your DM but sometimes people interpret things differently. If it is the case then take your daughter somewhere else.

simpering and flirting with the father of one of the little girls
Why does it always have to start with unpleasantness? Where is the common sense? You're unhappy that your daughter didn't receive enough guidance. Why not start there instead of making the teacher out to be some brainless floozy?

Because the reason my daughter wasn't given any guidance was because the instructor chose to focus on one child and her father only.
No suggestion of brainless floozy.

simpering and flirting

What do you call this then?!

You presumably aren't forced to send her.take her out if she's not enjoying it. Or don't. Not really sure why you need to ask anyone else.

Does flirting make you brainless?
I wasn't aware of this fact 🙄

Simpering?! And you know full well your implication was that the woman was too focussed on a sexual interest in that father to give your daughter guidance.

Yes
This is true

So sorry if this word offends yo

'Apparently'

And therein lies the rub.

It doesn't - it simply tells says a lot about you. I hope you manage to either sort it find a group better suited to your daughter.

Maybe try to take her once before you judge. Stuff like this takes a high level of gymnastic ability; it’s quite possible this girl is the only one in the class who has it enough to do it properly which is why the teacher gives her extra attention. But you won’t know until you go.

You have a second-hand account of something subjective happening once in a class that has previously been fine. Your first impulse is to believe the teacher was so overcome by a man that she "simpered" and spent the entire class ignoring everybody but one student.

My advice? Think a bit deeper.

Give it another week or two, and if possible try and take your DD yourself so you can better judge what goes on in class. Perhaps that girl had an exam/ show/ presentation or something coming up?
However, whatever the reason If you're paying for a lesson, then instruction should be given; it's unacceptable to ignore some members of the class whilst focusing on others.

op I would be pissed off too. If you can go I would go and have a word with her afterwards.Otherwise I would cancel the class and explain why.

Seething seems a bit of a strong emotion to feel about this. I think I'd go and watch a lesson myself and then maybe work on assertiveness with daughter to encourage her to ask for the help that she needs.

Some people just come on here to cause trouble I think babycham.
Just ignore don’t engage.
Re your DD- I would do what a pp says and go and see for myself.
Or, you could phone the instructor and ask her why your DD received no training/instruction this week?? I would be asking for a refund or credit for this weeks lesson too but I am from Yorkshire!

@AnduinsGirl do you by any chance run an Ariel hoops class

I'm a bit surprised at some of the responses you're getting here, OP...

it’s quite possible this girl is the only one in the class who has it enough to do it properly which is why the teacher gives her extra attention

She shouldn't get extra attention if they're all paying the same. Furthermore, the other students won't improve if she doesn't actually help them!

You have a second-hand account of something subjective

From two people, though... OP's DD and DM. OP knows these two people well enough to know if they're prone to exaggeration or not, and how well to trust their judgement, and has made that call.

My advice? Think deeper.

Cringeworthily patronising non-advice.

Thanks so much for the sensible replies. I have no malice towards this woman, I'm simply upset for my daughter and feel a bit cheated out of the hourly fee.

Thanks Lycanthropology

I used to take my DN to a gymnatics class and stopped for this reason. It was in the basement of the leisure centre and had a large glass mezzanine where men would watch the teenage instructor. She hardly ever took her eyes off the men upstairs and was not focused on the class at all.

I would go and watch if you are able to rejig your work and assess the situation. Then you have the eyewitness perspective and can intervene in the lesson. I’m not saying to disbelieve them but a situation is always best to be tackled at the time if possible. If you have no joy, is there anyone else to complain to?

Either send her a text/email or next time you go, you or MIL should say something before the session.

Something along the lines of 'DD was quite frustrated last week, she feels she needs more help with X and Y, would you be able to keep an eye on her please?'

Seething?! Really?!