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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To ask this lady to turn her light off?

32 replies

itsgoodtobehome · 22/06/2018 23:31

Help - I need some real time MN advice. I’m currently in hospital. They have finished the last round of checks, and put all the lights out. Except the lady next to me has said she wants to read, and has got the light in her cubicle on. It’s making my cubicle really bright and I can’t sleep. What shall I do? It’s 11.30 pm, so not exactly early. Is there a curfew on this type of thing?

OP posts:

Notthatwomanagain · 22/06/2018 23:32

Ask her
Sleep is really important when you are ill and it’s hard enough to get any on a busy ward without additional stress
I can see why she might not be tired yet but she needs to either use a kindle or turned down phone or accept she can’t read.

LoopyLou1981 · 22/06/2018 23:34

In my experience, I find putting pillow over the back of my head and facing away from the light works. I never gave the heart to ask anyone to stop doing something in hospital asi know no one wants to be there.
Hope you get out soon x

DickensianHysteric · 22/06/2018 23:35

I realise it must be annoying, but I don't think you can ask her to turn it off it's in her own cubicle and she is reading. 11.30pm isn't that late to me, I think you will just have to wait a bit, hopefully she will want to go to sleep herself soon. Hope you have a restful night.

SmellMyBeads · 22/06/2018 23:35

Could you get one of those eye masks things for tomorrow night. It's annoying but if it were me in probably wouldn't say anything. The joys of hospital

KarmaStar · 22/06/2018 23:36

Ask the staff to help you resolve the problem op.sweet dreams

LeahJack · 22/06/2018 23:38

No, you can’t ask her that. If she is in pain, uncomfortable or too anxious to sleep you can’t ask her to lie in the darkness awake with nothing to occupy her mind.

You could ask her if she could face it away or dim it slightly. And an eye mask is a good idea. Earplugs too. Someone will start snoring soon. Hospitals are shit places for sleep.

Original poster

itsgoodtobehome · 22/06/2018 23:40

I think she keeps falling asleep, as I hear snoring, but then she wakes up and I hear her turning pages again. I’m worried that she is just going to fall asleep and then the light will be on all night.

OP posts:

hellokittymania · 22/06/2018 23:44

I think I would probably ask the staff to help. I am actually very afraid of the dark, so usually have a night light anyway, but I remember in the hospital I was so out of it that I just slept for nearly the entire time I was there this was a tie government hospital and we were in an open room with about 20+ people, so the light was turned off at night anyway. I can't remember what time though.

SoftBallSophie · 22/06/2018 23:46

I think you need to call a nurse and quietly, tactfully tell her (it must happen ALL the time) they'll sort it for you.

It is really selfish of this woman, but it probably hasn't occurred to her that you are still awake because of her. Really, you need to speak up. Good luck

LeahJack · 22/06/2018 23:50

Talk to the staff. It could be a health issue re breathing and stuff. They might be able to move one of you or provide a lower light. I was in hospital for quite a while with two of my pregnancies and they were generally quite reluctant to enforce a lights out time.

TarragonChicken · 22/06/2018 23:50

Are the lights in the ceiling or on the wall at the head of the bed? If the latter, many hospital bed spaces have an uplighter and downlighter - can you check she's only got the downlighter on? If there's an examination lamp that's adjustable it would be reasonable to ask her to use that, angled away from you.

You could ask the staff if they have any eye masks. Some places do, most don't, but even if not, might prompt them to find a solution!

Southfields · 22/06/2018 23:53

Lay a sock across your eyes.

ikeepaforkinmypurse · 23/06/2018 00:04

Another example of why communal wards are a disgrace.

I don't think either of you are BU. It's not a prison, you can't force a ban on lights at certain times. I hope she has a downlight which would be less bright for you, and I agree with the eyemask suggestion (or just a tshirt on your eyes)

It is hell to share a ward with other people, but I hope you get some sleep.

Original poster

itsgoodtobehome · 23/06/2018 00:05

I’m going to speak to a nurse as I’m pretty sure she is now asleep, which makes it even more annoying!!

OP posts:

SilverySurfer · 23/06/2018 00:05

If it's not the light something else will keep you awake half the night, it could be be noisy patients (one in my ward screamed and shouted all night so the nurses moved her in her bed out of the ward into the hospital corridor every night), people getting up to go to the loo, people calling a nurse for a bedpan, nurses coming into the ward to check on a patient, if one is on a drip, the machine beeps loudly when it has finished.... and when you finally fall asleep at 5am, you will be woken up at 6 with the drugs round, breakfast etc. I know from experience after eight weeks on traction

HarshingMyMellow · 23/06/2018 00:08

@itsgoodtobehome I feel for you.

From experience a dark top, scarf, eye mask or sunglasses were the only options.
Hope you manage to get some sleep

CanIBuffalo · 23/06/2018 00:12

Eye mask and wax ear plugs tomorrow night OP. It's the only way.

RB68 · 23/06/2018 00:13

Speak to staff quietly and ask them to facilitate her having a specific reading light as the overhead one is too disturbing. They usually have lights out somewhere between 11 and 12 depending on the ward.

victoriaspongecake · 23/06/2018 00:14

Close your eyes?

notangelinajolie · 23/06/2018 00:20

^^
This. Close your eyes and it will be dark. Honestly not getting how you can tell her her lights are on if you can't see them?

IWantMyHatBack · 23/06/2018 00:25

Haha, 'close your eyes'

You've clearly not experienced the nuclear glare of the hospital bed light.

KneesupGaston · 23/06/2018 00:27

YABU really. Every time I've stayed in hospital there has been little sleep between nurses doing their obs, neighbours watching stuff on their laptops all night, FaceTiming at 2am (to be fair she was in labour), or older ladies with dementia shouting at night. Hospitals are not great places for sleeping but that's just the way it is.

ikeepaforkinmypurse · 23/06/2018 00:34

Close your eyes?

why did the OP not think of that!

Armchairanarchist · 23/06/2018 00:35

Ask the nurses for a sleep mask. They usually have some.

TimeToDash · 23/06/2018 00:36

Does she not have a reading light rather than a full on main light? She might not realise.

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