Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

1 2

Original poster

Periods

26 replies

Uniquack · 21/06/2018 19:38

AIBU for wanting to stick my fingers in my ears and say na na na na while trying to pretend my 9yo DD didn't just start her first period?

OP posts:

LimeCheesecaker · 21/06/2018 19:39

Why do you want to react like that?

Original poster

Uniquack · 21/06/2018 19:42

Because she's 9!!! My baby lol. She's not allowed to grow up so fast!

OP posts:

Namechangedforthispost18 · 21/06/2018 19:44

I get that, today my oldest was getting a fitting for her primary school prom and I literally said "where did my baby go".

Time flies, and it is depressing.

9 is young isn't it, no wonder you're surprised.

bargainbin · 21/06/2018 19:45

That's crap for her. Yanbu to want her to enjoy a bit more of her childhood before dealing with puberty stuff

nottinghillgrey · 21/06/2018 19:46

Why do you want to react like that?

Well I'm sure the OP didn't mean literally

redcaryellowcar · 21/06/2018 19:48

It's childhood whizzing by. I completely get why you are a bit stunned and recommend that you don't try to watch the mamma Mia scene of 'slipping through my fingers' song.
I have two ds, ages 4&6 and as and when they ask about periods, I'm really honest as it happens to some girls so young that I think they ought to know enough not to be worried if a friend got or had hers.

Original poster

Uniquack · 21/06/2018 19:50

Well I'm sure the OP didn't mean literally.

My OP is obviously a bit tongue in cheek, but seriously - how the bloody hell do they grow up so fast? I'm not ready to deal with boobs and periods yet .

OP posts:

DuchyDuke · 21/06/2018 19:50

Puberty doesn’t mean she is less innocent or not as much of a child as other kids. You all need to grow up a little.

Sparklingbrook · 21/06/2018 19:54

YANBU OP. 9 seems young compared to when I was growing up.

Allthewaves · 21/06/2018 19:55

Poor pet. I think 9 is young to start periods. I was lucky and more like 13

Allthewaves · 21/06/2018 19:56

Tbh who actually enjoys having a period

MyOtherProfile · 21/06/2018 19:58

Puberty doesn’t mean she is less innocent or not as much of a child as other kids. You all need to grow up a little.

No but it does mean she is having to deal with things we would rather a little girl didn't just yet, I'm sure.
And maybe you need to try being a little more understanding.

Myotherusernameisbest · 21/06/2018 20:00

Oh bless her! Starting them so young is definitely really shitty poor love. It's bad enough at 12 or 13.

Don't look at it as her growing up though because she really isn't yet, it's just a bad call from nature. She's still just a little girl op.

between4and7 · 21/06/2018 20:05

seems so young. i was 15 and that was rubbish enough!

Original poster

Uniquack · 21/06/2018 20:17

I was 12. So many girls in her class have already started at 9 or 10. Apparently the amount of time they spend in front of screens instead of outdoors is affecting how early puberty starts.

OP posts:

DuchyDuke · 21/06/2018 20:33

I started mine at 8, 30 years ago along with 5 other girls. It has always happened but before girls were told to hide it. Nothing to do with screens how ridiculous.

TakemedowntoPotatoCity · 21/06/2018 20:47

I don't think yabu at this. It's quite sad for you and for her that she is having to deal with this so young. She is still a child.

nottinghillgrey · 21/06/2018 20:49

Puberty doesn’t mean she is less innocent or not as much of a child as other kids. You all need to grow up a little.

Are you always this nasty?

Posters don't need to 'grow up' because they can recognise that 9 is very young to be dealing with periods

agnurse · 21/06/2018 20:58

9 is on the young side but not necessarily abnormal. We have seen it in children as young as 8 in the past. Do you mind if I ask at what age you and your female relatives started? (Age at menarche, or onset of menstruation, tends to be consistent in families.)

She may find that smaller and thinner sanitary towels are more comfortable for her because she's probably smaller than most sanitary towel users. My kid started at 8 (she's tall and her mum started at 9 - I am her stepmum) and we found that U by Kotex works well for her.

You should be aware of two things:
a. It's quite likely that her cycle will not be regular at first. This is very normal.
b. Her initial periods may be very light and will probably go to a "normal" flow after several months. You may need to prepare her for this. (It happened to me. I thought I was bleeding rectally the first time I had a heavier flow.)

Ordinarily swimming is approved for menstruating girls and women, but in her case she may find a tampon very uncomfortable. (The prepubescent vagina is very sensitive, plus she may be too small to wear a tampon comfortably.) If she does swim, she may feel more comfortable to avoid swimming during her period, at least until she's a little older and can wear tampons comfortably.

LilacIris · 21/06/2018 21:12

I started at nine and had no idea what was happening, which made it even more awful. I have daughters, so I get why you want to pretend it isn’t happening but you need to be able to make sure she doesn’t realise that and that she understands what is going on.

Original poster

Uniquack · 21/06/2018 21:36

@agnurse - I started at 12 and started early menopause at 44. She been using Always dailies - they're very small and thin. And the period only lasted overnight really (last night 'till this morning). She has ASD and sensory issues, so tampons I would say would probably be a no-no, even when she's older. It's hard enough to get her to realise she has to get used to pads.

@LilacIris - my mom never spoke to us about it, and when I had my first period I had no clue what the hell was happening. Luckily one of DDs friends started a few months ago, so she's shared all the gory details. I've also had 'the chat' with both DDs twice now.

OP posts:

letsallhaveanap · 21/06/2018 21:41

I started at 9 and that was a long time ago... before the advent of ipads etc so im not sure that is the cause!!

Its hard to start so young, the pain especially is difficult to deal with as a young girl... and the crying for no reason... thought I was going mad!

MyOtherProfile · 21/06/2018 21:42

I don't think it's screens that bring on early menopause per se but rather the corresponding weight gain that often occurs. Over the last 100 years the age of period onset has got gradually earlier but some studies show this has begun to tail off.

LeighaJ · 21/06/2018 22:26

Geez that's rough for your daughter.

Youngest girl I knew to start was 10. Mine didn't start til I was 13.

LilacIris · 21/06/2018 22:38

Apparently the amount of time they spend in front of screens instead of outdoors is affecting how early puberty starts.

I started my periods in the 80s and wasn’t a fan of what little tv I was allowed to watch. I’ve never been a fan of computer games. However, in the years prior and at the time of my periods starting, I went horse riding most days, along with ice skating, swimming and general school sports.

I’ve always been on the low end of a normal BMI or underneath it and weighing too little, so that definitely wasn’t the reason I started at nine. My mum was 16 when she began and I remember it took a couple of years before another girl in my year started her periods.

Flip

1 2