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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Leave 8 year old alone for 15 mins?

76 replies

verite · 20/06/2018 20:37

My DS (8) is currently unwell. If he is still off school, WIBU to leave him in bed while I take my DD to Nursery. It’s a 5 min walk so 15 mins max. I have never left him alone before but he is generally sensible and follows instructions.

OP posts:
Butterflykissess · 20/06/2018 21:41

its takes babying your child to a whole new level! no way would my 7 yo fit in a buggy let alone a 9 yo? what 9 yo would sit in a buggy? my 7 yo would be mortified! (i dont have a car.)

ikeepaforkinmypurse · 20/06/2018 21:41

I was playing out aged 8 at the local park.
I am guessing that wasn't the park where banned dogs have been attacking other dogs and children, or the park where a gang of bullies was attacking other kids?
Is it possible that not all areas are as safe as your childhood park? Just a thought...

Ohmydayslove · 20/06/2018 21:44

ikeep

I grew up on a council estate. Hmm

Anyhoo I expect banned rabid dogs or bullies arnt going to invade the ops dss bedroom?

Ohmydayslove · 20/06/2018 21:46

Please don’t put your 9 year old in a buggy!

It won’t be forgotten by the other kids. Honestly don’t

ikeepaforkinmypurse · 20/06/2018 21:48

I grew up on a council estate
so what? Are all council estates the same?

I just find these posts irritating, it's great you did this or that, but not everybody lives in the same road in the same circumstances. You cannot tell someone what they should do or not when you know absolutely nothing about their child, their home and their neighborhood.

Ohmydayslove · 20/06/2018 21:51

ikeep

Mmmm it’s kind of how aibu works though isn’t it? People post and you post your general view.

If you find other people’s opinions irritating maybe it’s not the place for you.

ikeepaforkinmypurse · 20/06/2018 21:54

If you find other people’s opinions irritating maybe it’s not the place for you.

it's not their opinion as such, it's their unwillingness to understand that not everyone lives in the same circumstances and if they do or don't do something, it means everyone must do the same.

Growing up on a council estate doesn't mean that life is identical on all council estates in the country, so it's completely irrelevant what you can do in yours.

PorkFlute · 20/06/2018 21:54

I wouldn’t tbh. And I’m happy to leave my 10yr old for 30mins-1hr to go shopping. But I wouldn’t fancy leaving them if they were ill.
If there’s no-one else to take the nursery child I’d just keep them home if you’re home with your 8yo anyway.

Butterflykissess · 20/06/2018 21:55

err yeh the op ASKED for opinions.

You cannot tell someone what they should do or not when you know absolutely nothing about their child, their home and their neighborhood.

LuMarie · 20/06/2018 21:56

@tillytoodles1

When she came back, he was still in bed but dressed as Father Christmas

... and this is why children should be in charge of the world 😂

BurpeesAreTheWorkOfTheDevil · 20/06/2018 21:59

My 9 year old is more sensible than my 16 year old. I leave them on their own sometimes but I'm not sure who's babysitting who really 😆

NapQueen · 20/06/2018 21:59

I would definetly leave mine. Dd is 6.5 now and whilst I havent left her yet I know on 2 years time I would for 5 to 10 mins.

ikeepaforkinmypurse · 20/06/2018 21:59

err yeh the op ASKED for opinions.

and most posters replied with sensible advice and explanations. A bit different than the "I was alone in the wood when I was 1 year old" nonsense

clippityclock · 20/06/2018 22:01

I leave my 8 year old for 20 mins to quickly nip to shop or run dig round the block. He’s fine. I have my mobile number written in huge letters and the front door is locked. He can get out if back door.

Ohmydayslove · 20/06/2018 22:03

ikeep

Are you drunk? What on Earth are you on about.

Op says her 8 year old is sensible and it’s a 15 minute walk. I think it’s fine. My opinion.

Has anyone said i was alone in the woods aged 1

Do get a grip or put down the glass.

TokyoSushi · 20/06/2018 22:04

Vomiting, no. Otherwise I probably would.

ShawshanksRedemption · 20/06/2018 22:06

As parents we are the only people that know our kids well enough, as well as the home situation, to make the judgement call. With that we take the responsibility of that judgment call on our own shoulders, so in the extremely unlikely but not impossible scenario that anything happened, we would accept the consequences. It's what being a parent is. Some will feel comfortable with it, others will not. OP has made her own judgement call based on her knowledge of her DS and the situation.

bobstersmum · 20/06/2018 22:11

I would probably ask my lovely ndn to sit with him. Is there no one you could ask. I had a busybody neighbour ask me on the school run yesterday where my other ds was! I said he's at home with his dad! Made me wonder if he was thinking I'd left him. He's 4. Cheeky bugger though, I'm a good mum!

Bi11yOneMate · 20/06/2018 22:13

When I was 8 I used to babysit my 10yo older brother until our father came home from work 30 mins later Grin

He was not trusted in the house alone until he was 16 - and then he managed to lock himself out in the garden!

Really depends on the child. I wouldn't want to leave a poorly 8 year old though just in case they felt properly poorly while I was out and got upset.

theSnuffster · 20/06/2018 22:28

I wouldn't leave my 9 year old but he's not particularly sensible. (Although if he was on the Xbox he wouldn't even notice i'd gone.) I'd perhaps consider it if he had a way of contacting me but we don't have a landline so that's not an option. I'm sure plenty of children his age would be perfectly fine though.

Passthecake30 · 21/06/2018 06:22

I would, depending on the Illness. Not in bed though... I'd leave mine on the sofa staring at the tv so I know they are occupied. Would look front door but leave back door unlocked, and my phone no. is saved in our home phones.

dustarr73 · 21/06/2018 06:30

Perfect time to give him some independence.

Leave house phone beside him ring him after 5 minutes and when you're on your way home.

AJPTaylor · 21/06/2018 06:37

i would and have. does he play out? my rule of thumb was when he was old enough to play out, old enough to be left at home for a but.

Tumbleweed101 · 21/06/2018 06:39

Yes. I do this when I have to get my teen to the bus stop in the morning. I leave my now 9yo to finish getting ready for school so she’s ready when I get back to take her.

catburgers · 21/06/2018 06:45

I've left my 8 year old before yes.
With strict instructions that the only thing they can touch is the TV remote and they don't answer the door to anyone, not even me.

I leave my mobile number next to the phone if they need me.