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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Fancy Dress Parties

54 replies

Bennietheball · 18/06/2018 10:39

AIBU to think these are shit?

I've got to attend one at the end of this month. It's for a family members significant birthday so is unavoidable. They are obsessed with fancy dress and always ensure any celebration is fancy dress themed.

Honestly I can't bear it. It's just cringey and undignified. It's not an age thing, I never liked it in my 20s and I'm in my 40s now. I like parties, I drink, I dance.

But fancy dress frankly can fuck off.

It's not even abput dressing up. I'd be happy to go to a party in jeans and trainers. Just not a bloody chicken shit, frightwig, psychedelic print or what have you. Ugh.

OP posts:
BottleOfJameson · 18/06/2018 10:41

YANBU I hate fancy dress too. I feel like such a tool but I'd be happy to indulge the family member as a one off on their birthday/

Original poster
Bennietheball · 18/06/2018 10:41

I should add family member has no children and doesbt invite anyone else's so this is all adults, no children present. So not as though it's 'fun for the kids' or whatever.

OP posts:
PeapodBurgundy · 18/06/2018 10:45

I don't mind in theory, wouldn't choose one for myself, but don't mind joining in on occasions. As a fatty it's always a mare, and inevitably involves me making at least one element of my costume rather than a quick nip to the shop. Must lose weight.

Original poster
Bennietheball · 18/06/2018 10:48

The party itself will be terrible as we only know about 4 people - all the others are family members sports club friends who just basically ignore us because we're not a) local or b) In the club. Which of itself would be crap. But the fancy dress makes it all so much worse.

Who decided fancy dress was fun ffs?!

OP posts:
PeapodBurgundy · 18/06/2018 18:09

Any way for you to either not go, or have a vitsl reason to leave early so it won't be too excrutiating for you?

harriethoyle · 18/06/2018 18:10

Oh god I bloody love fancy dress Grin sorry OP!

Original poster
Bennietheball · 18/06/2018 23:41

Unfortunately we have to go. However I can't drink for medical reasons and DP will be driving (my car is off road) so not drinking either. We will try and use that as an excuse to make an early departure.

OP posts:
MamaMiapartytime · 18/06/2018 23:50

What is the theme? We can think of a way that you can do it without full on fancy dress>

I never do fancy dress- I just decline.

YoThePussy · 18/06/2018 23:58

Can you go and wear fancy dress for ten minutes or so and then oops it falls to bits. I would make something to wear, why should you spend money on somethig you don’t want to do. Crepe paper is your friend.

SheGotBetteDavisEyes · 19/06/2018 00:06

God I haven't been to a fancy dress party in a decade or more!

I don't know anyone who has them now! The last one was a bit 'I'm mad, me' and I recall several cringeworthy moments now I think about it. It's not my bag at all, YANBU.

I'll wear a witch's hat at Hallowe'en for the kids, that's about it Grin

Effic · 19/06/2018 00:06

I agree - I totally and utterly loathe fancy dress. I have only agreed to go to 2 parties ever under sufferance. Both times went in 1920 fringed flapper dress (can get for £10 on eBay) with evening gloves and a fake cigarette holder with very fucked off other half in black suit with fedora hat and toy tommy gun - hat, gun, cigarette holders were immediately left on a convenient table to be collected at the end and gloves and suit jacket removed within 20 mins so fairly comfortable- if that’s any help

hellohello12345 · 19/06/2018 00:17

Oh god I HATE fancy dress parties. Just embarrassing. So feel for you especially as you can't just get pissed.

Mammyloveswine · 19/06/2018 00:26

Oooh I love fancy dress but you can "dress up" ordinary clothes so you don't have to look OTT.

Checked shirt and jeans... add a cowboy hat (which you can remove asap).

Little Black dress... add bunny ears and bowtie to be a "bunny girl" (yes a bit of a sexist one but remove ears and tie and you're just wearing an LBD).

White shirt and black skirt with glasses could be a secretary or you can get "police officer" kits dead cheap.

Red dress could add devil horns.

White dress.. add angel wings.

TheClitterati · 19/06/2018 00:30

I love fancy dress parties. Haven't been invited to one is years. I will go in your place OP - no one need know Grin

Original poster
Bennietheball · 19/06/2018 13:30

The theme is TV programmes.

I said I'll just wear my own clothes and be an audience member. DP hates this stuff more than me, thinks adults in FD look ridiculous and there is no way he will wear any kind of costume.

OP posts:
ghostyslovesheets · 19/06/2018 13:32

just wear a brown overall coat and carry 4 candles - job done

kissthealderman · 19/06/2018 13:33

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

icelollycraving · 19/06/2018 13:34

That’s a pretty broad theme, easy too!

user1485342611 · 19/06/2018 13:38

If it's like any of the fancy dress parties I've been to, half the guests won't bother to dress up and will stand around looking a bit sneerily amused at the people who have.

That is the main reason I hate fancy dress parties.

ComtesseDeSpair · 19/06/2018 13:40

I LOVE fancy dress! I never buy a costume though, half the fun is in making it and putting it together. And you can definitely drink and dance in fancy dress - all the club nights I go to certainly attest to it.

Surely there must be a cartoon character you can go as? Or an animal from a David Attenborough documentary.

G1nF1zz · 19/06/2018 13:41

Take some large coffee cups and go as one of the Friends lot.

user1485342611 · 19/06/2018 13:43

Wear a penny and curlers and go as Hilda Ogden.

stickygotstuck · 19/06/2018 13:45

OP, are you me??

My way round it is to keep it very low key -
Animal themed party? Shark T-shirt.
Space themed party? Star Wars T-shirt from Tesco.
Gangster party? DC's plastic water pistol in my jeans pocket.

That's lots for me. Everybody else can do the full costume, mask and makeup, I'll be the minimalist guest Smile.

Foslady · 19/06/2018 13:45

Make a very oversized Blue Peter badge and go as a presenter!

Foslady · 19/06/2018 13:46

Or send a voicemail to their phone wishing them happy birthday, don’t go and say you were there as an announcer!