To cook simple food

[Sheeparemyfriends]

Husband has gone off on a rant about how our menu is boring. Both work full-time and have 3/4 kids at home - eldest on and off as she is at uni. He offers to cook, then forgets or says he is too tired. For info, the menu varies from week to week, may have fish and sausages each week though, just cooked differently.

If he’s 50 per cent responsible, he can whinge and change things up. If he’s not then he doesn’t get to choose, if you both work the same hours.

YANBU - both working full time with kids and running a house is hard work! I do meals as simple as possible.

If he can't /won't cool then he graciously accepts what you make. Otherwise, point him in the direction of the nearest takeaway.

He should move into my house for a month. We have about 5 meals on rotation. He’d soon want to go home

So he should be cooking at least three days each week then? You could tell him that it'll be basic food for at least three nights a week and he can cook exciting, exotic food for three or four nights each week.

How is money for you? A friend of mine uses Gusto (they are well off, cash rich, time poor) and really rates the variety. Might be worth a try? He can order, pay for and prepare of course

Make him toast

not

Go on then: apart from sausages and fish most weeks what are you feeding them, all, poor souls?
I can't tell if either of you are being unreasonable about the menus.
HIBU in expecting you to do it all, but we can't judge the range of foods based on the info provided"

Chilli, veggie frittata, stir fry, Bolognese, veggie curries and Dahl, cauliflower cheese bake, pasta with various sauces, pork chops, jacket potatoes, homemade pizza etc. It is all home made apart from emergency fish fingers and fish cakes.

Ask him which days of the week he will be cooking. Don’t bail him out if he fucks up. Keep a supply of suitable snack food for you and children hidden if he does fuck up.

So your unacceptably simple menu includes dishes from all continents, different textures and flavours, some meat, some veggie.

YANBU, standard family fare I'd say.
YDHIBU. If he wants it fancier he needs to do some himself.

No, you're fine and he's being unreasonable. He should be grateful you cook for everyone, not complaining. And when he cooks, which should be half the time, he can cook whatever he wants.

Just tell him now responsible for all meals including shopping for the next 3 months and then you will be prepared to reassess then.

If he is whinging but not doing anything about it then he is acting like a man toddler. YANBU

Yanbu. Sit down every Saturday morning to plan menu and make shopping list together and be quite clear about which days are ‘his’ for preparing dinner. I.e. ‘right, I’ll do roast tomorrow, frittata on Monday, spag Bol on Wednesday and we can get takeaway on Friday. What are you cooking today, Tuesday and Thursday?’

Worked in my house.

OP can I come round? Menu sounds lovely. As a start, why not tell him he cooks one evening meal at weekends. Tell him there may st be no repeats within 6 months.
That way he gets variety.

Yanbu

'He offers to cook, then forgets or says he is too tired. '

STOP cooking for him. 'You whinged about what's cooked. You offer to cook and then conveniently forget. So you can sort yourself out.'

Yanbu. He can start bloody cooking himself. Your menu sounds fine x

Indeed, why would you cook for someone who does not enjoy the results?

You would be doing him a kindness to stop.

Sound like a good range of food to me. If you do ever feel like changing it up you could stick the porkch ops into a baggie with some marinade in the morning, or other little changes like that.

Honestly if he's that fussed he should sort dinner out himself for the family. Me and DH work full time and do nursery pickups. Dinner is whatever we can plonk quickly in the oven and cook in 30 min or cook all in 1 pan on the hob.

IMO the fussier person needs to cook. In my house that's me so I do virtually all of the cooking.

Normally I'd say to just google a few new things as I'm easily bored as well, but no way if he's being a lazy sod.

I'm the same (simple food) the children like a range of about three things, and I'm not making all sorts of stuff weekdays. Sometimes he or I will make something a bit different Fridays or Saturdays, and Sunday night is always leftovers.

I think mine finds it boring, and I do too, at times but I can only cope with simple stuff weekdays and feel if he wants a change he can bring a takeout or something. or make something else for himself.

I did go through a stage of just putting a potato in the oven to bake and that was it. He was a bit like, oh potato again.

Your menu sounds far more complex than mine!

OP I think your meals sound great. Plenty of variety and I admire you for managing all homemade when you work full time. Your DH should of course cook. Mine should too but doesn’t. All I can get him to make is soup, (nice for lunch, not as dinner!).

Being a man, I bet he probably just fancied less soft veggie stuff and more meat. I bet he would like steak and chips; gammon steak with a fried egg on top; roast beef and gravy. I have finally mastered a nice pot-roast beef cooked in slow cooker if you would like the recipe. I think for every new recipe you introduce he should be doing the same though!