AIBU to be so upset I can’t lose weight?

[WeirdScenesInsideTheGoldmine]

So depressed, been doing ketogenic diet for three weeks, have been a total saint and appetite magically totally suppressed to the point that I’m eating once a day.....

I’m not starving myself, but god I’ve been virtuous

I’ve lost precisely 1lb
I am 44 and angry
I just ate a load of carrot cake.

I only had a stone to lose a year ago it would have done off super quick

I just can’t lose weight.

AIBU to think I may have to accept being overweight?

AUBU to think that this is being 44?

I sympathise - I recently spent 3 weeks eating 1400 calories a day and lost a lb. 15 years ago I lost 8 lbs in my first week on weight watchers!

I'm 45 and pre-menopausal, so I'm guessing that must be the link. I'm considering low carb but I loathe eggs, and my IBS flares up when I eat fibre. That leaves me with mostly meat protein and whatever fruit, veg and fats won't give me the shits (I also have no gallbladder).

I'm so bored of chicken and salad but have no imagination. I guess I'm fat then, I'll just wear lovely make-up and clothes and try to polish my inner pig.

I’m following the low carb boot camp threads and have lost 3kg in 4 weeks. I’m in my 50s. I’m definitely eating a lot more than you. Three meals most days but plenty of water. I’m 5ft 6 too and now just over 12st. My happy weight would be about 11st 5 but size 12. I’m realising that it’s better to be healthy than super slim.

Don’t punish yourself by eating the chips. Just look at the boot camp threads. People have lost several stones and sometimes stay still for a few weeks. KOKO

One meal per day is going to f*ck your metabolism up. As is less than 1,000 calories per day. You're starving yourself so your body will be doing it's best to hang on to every bit of weight it can.

Eat regular meals rather than once a day. Drink LOTS of water. And be active!

Getting older makes losing weight harder but not impossible.

I'm 48 and I take medication that has weight gain as a side effect. (I have 3 more years left on the bloody stuff!) So I kind of stopped bothering to watch my weight as I just thought it was a losing battle given the meds plus getting older. Until 2 years later I looked in the mirror and was horrified at what I'd become. So 4.5 weeks ago, I started working with a personal trainer 3 times a week (80% weight training / strongman work, 20% circuit training / bootcamp), being active every day and keeping my diet restricted to 1600 calories per day. I eat clean and tend to eat mainly lean meat, green leafy or cruciferous vegetables and some lower GI fruit (berries, etc), and almost always eggs for breakfast. I still allow myself a skinny flat white every day and the occasional glass of red wine. I will be totally honest and say that the gym sessions are miserably hard and I work past my limits every single time. I used to be a gym instructor myself and competed at a senior level in a sport so I like to work hard when I train but this is at my max and then beyond. I dread it but I like the results. In 4 weeks, I've lost 10 pounds. Actually, I've lost almost one stone but I gained a few pounds of muscle so my net loss over 4 weeks is 10 pounds. I was shocked as I thought I had no chance of losing weight given my age and the meds. It was a lovely surprise and it proves it can be done! Now I just have to keep it going but I hope it gives you some hope OP.

What exercise are you doing?

You can't continue living on an omelette a day or whatever you are having. Your body is likely clinging on to the reserves that you have.

You need to be eating small, balanced meals, little and often. And exercising. Running or swimming are good whole body workouts. Walking every day even.

Please don't crash diet. It's totally pointless and won't help you keep the weight off in the long run.

I’m talking theee egg beasts when I’m talking omelettes guys

Umm I’m not starving myself!

Well if you are doing low carb or keto you still need to eat! One meal a day is not enough. And loads more water. 3 litres a day at least. And you need veg.

The low carb Bootcamp threads are great - BIWI is very knowledgeable and helpful. I have to say I don’t feel particularly well on low carb so I don’t do it myself but I know it works really well for others.

What fat did you fry that omelette in?
Write down fully every thing that went in your mouth, daily.
I don't believe only had 800 kcal/day for 3 weeks and only lost 1 lb. Sorry.

Someone on here said she was only eating 300 kcal/day.
Then she said "Oh wait, I just added up all the milk I have in cups of tea and that's another 500/day". Somehow it's easy to be blind.

Umm I’m not starving myself!

So you're gorging on something huge, once a day. Call it what you want, it's not healthy and not sustainable.

What exercise are you doing?

With my limited knowledge of low carbing, I thought you didn't count calories if you were following this WOE? I've been low carb/high fat for 18 months now and have definitely found it the easiest way to lose weight and keep it off.

However I didn't reduce my food to one meal a day (your 3 egg omelette would be breakfast here) and really upped the fat I as eating. Seems weird at first but you soon get used to it. And water. Drink it like you never have! I have a pint when I get out of bed, a litre throughout the day and have half a pint every time I walk through the kitchen so probably 2.5 litres a week.

OH, and exercise. Not for everyone but I go the gym 4-5 times a week for 1.5 hour sessions. At 42, I have to do all this to be slim as it's definitely harder after 40!

One meal per day is going to fck your metabolism up. As is less than 1,000 calories per day. You're starving yourself so your body will be doing it's best to hang on to every bit of weight it can.*

This is very untrue. You would have to eat like this for a very long period of time to cause metabolic damage.

Also your body will not hang onto fat if you’re not eating. You will lose muscle mass though.

LilllyoftheValley over the last few years, many credible studies have been done and it's more than 20% difference, but it depends on what exercise you do.

You have to exercise over 40, because once you are post Menopause, you look like crap and a lot of people feel crap, as well. You need to build lay foundations as soon as you can, then build on them.

I joined a Women only weight training group, a few years ago, I've since not been well. We were 45-75 and everyone had changed their body shape with the programme designed for us.

more importantly, we were gaining strength and protecting our bone density etc.

"You will lose muscle mass though."

That's what I forgot to add to my post.

Also, they way of eating isn't any good for you, if you do enter the Peri- Menopause.

But if anyone says muscle weighs more than fat. I will reach through the screen and back hand you grin

It’s more dense. If you have two containers of identical volume and fill one with water and the other with sand, the sand filled one will be heavier. Similarly with human bodies.

I'm 48 and have found that weight training - Body pump has made a huge difference. It's a slow weight loss but massive shape improvement. Trying to increase protein and reduce carbs as i tend to eat too much of the latter.
So I would say start doing some weights - you'll feel great, don't calorie count and eat plenty of healthy protein.

I'm mid 40's and doing Slimming World. I eat loads, and am losing 3-4lb a week.

I'm not drinking alcohol though. I think you aren't eating enough and your body thinks it is starving and is retaining fat/calories.
Try 2 smaller meals a day. And some vegetables.
And more water. 1L isn't much.

I am struggling post menopause, been with slimming world for 18 months, the first year everything went ok slow but sure lost weight, then put on half a stone, have worked very hard the last month and lost 2lbs, had a meal out on Thursday and Friday so put it back on. I could cry. Stopped going to SW but follow the plan, every day a speed day, they say you can eat pasta, rice, potatoes, sadly I cannot. They say you can have syns each day, pah not I.

My food plan, Breakfast 2 eggs, lunch a big salad lettuce, spring onion, radish, tomatoes, basil, peppers and some fish, dinner fish or chicken with lots of veg and a potato or a bit of pasta. Later on some berries. I have my milk allowance. I am not hungry really, sometimes I cannot sleep then I have a small glass of milk. It is bloody hard. But I am sure that at least I am eating very healthily.

You are eating one meal a day. an example of which is a 3 egg omelette!!? That is not healthy really is it!?

Why not ignore fad diets and just get a good app that counts calories for you, join a gym and don't look at the scales for a few weeks. It will be slow because of your age but there is no reason why you won't lose and lose in a sensible, healthy, maintainable way. Fad diets just make you fatter in the end.

Op you said you had Pmt last week? I am my " best" weight about a week after my period. Is there a possibility that the scales have been tipped with bloating etc? As for losing weight , patience. Unfortunately there is no miracle quick fix, exercise, reduce carbs and throw away the scales and go by how clothes fit. The fact that the scales said only 1lb lighter has made you reach for the chips and cake, but were you feeling better about your weight before this? Also don't beat yourself up about the chips and cake , enjoy them and reset tomorrow.

NC for this obviously.

Well I'm in a similar boat, a very similar weight/height to you OP, and I'm a decade older. I just feel like screaming!

I think I eat increasingly little and my appetite like you has become fairly suppressed.

I don't really know what the answer is.

There seems to be no point in starving myself temporarily - if I can't keep it up long term!

Perhaps you have to eat "clean" for a long time (more than 3 weeks) with very little diversion from this to make things "happen".

However, at some point, it may be that I need to accept things are different now. Perhaps we have a ridiculous notion that we should all be slim like Liz Hurley in our 50s. The reality in most of the world is that post menopausal women are usually chubby. Think of the "mamma" in the Dolce & Gabanna ads, or most places in Southern Europe. Perhaps it would be better to just aim to be as reasonably healthy as possible ....

I just don't know.

Keto diets can make you retain a lot of water and poop. So it’s useful to take pictures. I also usually take a laxative at the weekend because it resolves the problem and gives me a proper idea of my weight.

Weigh every day and use a tracker app
Otherwise you don't get the true picture. I'll use 100lbs as a starting example
Day 1 - 100lbs
Day 2 - 100lbs
Day 3 - 99lbs
Day 4 - 100lbs
Day 5- 98lbs
Day 6 - 97lbs
Day 7 (traditional weigh day) - 101lbs

So weigh on day 7 and you'll go "fuck it, I gained a pound"
Put that into a tracker app and you'll see the downwards trend!

Thanks everybody

I’m not doing enough water I suspect

BUT I’ve woken up to a 4lb loss so, maybe the message is... it’s not linear

I refuse to be fat in my forties. Really determine now to get the rest off. Thanks everybody for your advice, I’m having a good read as soon as I get my kids off to school

Weigh yourself daily and use the average - you can do this on fitbit’s app. It’s much more accurate than once a week.

Have a look at things like TeamRH - try following something structured and eat regularly.

I think we all need to stop using being menopausal as an excuse. I’m menopausal and I don’t look like crap thanks very much. I’m losing steadily by counting calories and macros.

I am similar age to you. I'm doing the 5:2 diet and the weight is dropping.

However, I gave up weighing myself on the scale about a year ago as my weight goes up and down like a yo yo. I am, however losing inches which is all that matters.

helloflamingo I think I'd rather have some post-menopausal weight than your unpleasant attitude about looking "crap". Just goes to show about beauty being on the inside.