AIBU to think I have to put up with this white hair?

[Fenwickdream]

Hi
Sorry posting for traffic as I'm desperate.
I'm looking for people who, like me, have dark hair with lots of grey (white) that just won't colour anymore.
I'm only 38 but after a stressful few years I'm so white at the temples and parting. The rest of my hair is really dark though. Colour / dye just won't stay in my hair unless it's really, really dark and then it's horrible and witchy. Plus my hair grows so fast it's coming back through in literally a week. There must be a way out of this, it's depressing! It's so ageing.

Has anyone with the same hair successfully found a solution? I'd happily go lighter but it's going to be so hard with all the built up dark dye and wouldn't I just be in the same problem with my roots looking black?
Is it worth going lighter?
Is there a way to make the dye hold onto my hair?
I'm in West Sussex, near Chichester. I'd pay literally anything for a really good hairdresser to help me right now.
The problem is I hate the look of streaky, ashy blonde in dark hair. I'd really need someone that was a brilliant colourist to get the tones right if I did go lighter.
Anyone got any tips?

Thank you

@ Findo.

I work in vol too, in my head. It confuses the shit outta me when a colleague asks me to go mix something with 1.9%. I have to drag all the bottles out and start reading them. Why can't they just say 6 vol like me normal people?

And I was also wrong. 20 vol is not 12% because 12% is the strongest, so must be 40 vol, not something I'd recommend playing with unless you know what you're doing.

They use 60 vol and stronger in the US. My scalp burns at the thought of it. Luckily, you have to be licensed in the US to buy it, probably why the UK banned it. Anyone can walk into a trade store and buy anything over here.

It always confuses me how people feel fine advising others to pour potentially dangerous chemicals onto their skin when they and the people they're advising have had no training

It kills me that places like Sally's sell these chemicals to Joe Public as well. They should remain in the Salon Services sites

They use 60 vol and stronger in the US. My scalp burns at the thought of it. Luckily, you have to be licensed in the US to buy it, probably why the UK banned it

I remember they banned it due to it being an ingredient used in the making of home bombs.

No-one's hair ever ever ever needs 60vol eh!!!

I would try a salon if you can afford it. I get mine done at a local salon and the price is not horrendous. I'm similar to you - very dark brown hair with at least 60% grey throughout and more at the temples. The salon dye covers it completely though the colour does look slightly red on the white hair and fades a bit faster. But it doesn't stand out - just makes my hair look more multi-tonal. It is very close to the original colour and looks very natural. I go every 4-5 weeks, though the roots are starting to show by then. I'm sure they could check first to see how your hair responds to the colour.

If you want to do it your self take a look at the E Salon. They sent me two differing colours, one for my roots and one for the hair below.
I would extol the benefits of a good hairdresser who will strip the colour slowly over the course of weeks or months.

My hairdresser cut of two strands from underneath my hair and tested for damage . She is now stripping the dark dye from my hair.
The aim is to blend in the grey with the stripped hair with a base of caramel or ash and make my hair lighter overall.
Doing at home I was heading for the darker and then darker witchy look with reddish roots where the grey would not take the colour.

I would see a hairdresser to get you back to the shade you want to be. You could listen

The best box dye I’ve found for resistant white/grey is L’Oréal excellence.

Go to a Hairdresser and get some advice.

I'm naturally dark brown. Coloured my hair for years. The grey started coming through quickly and I kept covering it. My hair has now become resistant to colour and fades out very quickly.

So I removed the colour and put an Ash Blonde colour on and have grown out the grey.

Looks much better now and my hair is in much better condition.

Ok thanks ladies I'm going to try a hairdresser but I live in a naff seaside Town so the hairdressers are all a bit naff. I'll try Chichester.

At the grand age of 40 I stopped dyeing my dark salt and pepper hair all together. I got a funky pixie cut and I ABSOLUTELY love my hair far more than I did when it was long dark and dyed. Embrace your grey.

What kind of dye have you tried? Are you leaving it on for the full time? Are you doing roots for the full time and the ends for a few minutes only?

Strip the colour and go blonde?
Henna?

My Grey's are becoming more noticeable so the dye doesn't last as long. I used nice & easy last time and it seems better, but I touched it up each day on holiday with very dark eyebrow powder. I'm going to get the john Frieda hair powder next time I go shopping for in between dyes. I did have the L'Oréal spray but I think the powder is better now. It also colours in the scalp so makes my hair look thicker.

Clarol Age Defy colour range come with a clear leave on pre treatment to soften grey hair before colouring.

It works really well. If you are repeating colouring a lot, even for roots, I put Vaseline through the bits of hair I don't want re-dyed as dye build up looks black.

I dye my white roots every 9 days and if I follow this it's ok.