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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

We don't have a TV in our living room anymore. AIBU?

184 replies

mrsm43s · 08/06/2018 23:26

So many people think its weird!

We have plenty of tvs in the house! Our bedroom, upstairs spare room, plus everyone has a tablet or a phone or a laptop or some other way of watching TV if they want to.

We don't have a tv downstairs.

AIBU to think that the days of everyone round the telebox to watch mindless crap are over?

TV itself is fine, but its OK to not make it the centre of your life and family!

OP posts:
ferrier · 09/06/2018 08:28

I prefer the lounge TV over a smaller TV or laptop/tablet. It's much bigger so the immersive experience for a film or pretty much anything really is much better. I only don't care when it's something like the news or a quiz show.

BertrandRussell · 09/06/2018 08:29

I like not having a TV set in my living room from an aesthetic point of view. BUT. We have white walls and a projector and chrome cast.So when we want to watch telly in the living room we project it into the wall. Best of both worlds.

Ilovecamping · 09/06/2018 08:29

We have one tv and that is in the living room, we listen to digital radio on tv during the day, and very rarely watch live tv, we record programmes and watch whenever. Can’t stand TVs in bedrooms

WellAndTrulyCurbed · 09/06/2018 08:30

Also not getting how watching TV individually makes it less 'mindless' or how watching individually changes whether it is the 'centre' of anything.

Not having a tv in the living room isn't particularly 'wierd' I don't think. I wouldn't do it because I LOVE watching with my teens (we have shows or movies that we must watch together.lol ) but I don't think there is anything wrong with not having one in any particular room.

I guess I just don't really 'get' the question. Everyone still watches tv yeah? You just don't really watch together?

TheFirstMrsDV · 09/06/2018 08:31

light I have one in the shed.

There is this weird idea on MN that if you have a tv somewhere it has to be on.
None of mine are on atm.
My children have always had tvs in their rooms. They have to ask before they are switched on. They are not allowed on after 7ish pm. Dodgy channels are deleted.

Its only been a problem with one DC who kept turning on without permission. Turned out he has autism. So we dealt with that issue by removing remote control. He could ask for that if he wanted to watch.

I can't see why its better to have kids on various individual gadgets watching who knows what than it is to have bedroom tvs that can be seen and heard by adults.

TheFirstMrsDV · 09/06/2018 08:32

Bert have you seen the adverts for 'ambient' tvs?
I am not one for new tech but they look interesting.

They sort of morph into the background when not in use.

PintOfMineralWater · 09/06/2018 08:32

I don't like how when you walk into a living room all the furniture is arranged around a TV. I prefer it to be a space where we sit and talk, but I know not everyone feels like that.

numptynuts · 09/06/2018 08:34

We have a tv in the living room just to watch DVDs. Hasn't been switched on for 3 months.

Also like to watch all4 on iPad occasionally but that's it. TV is such a waste of time!

LightAsTheBreeze · 09/06/2018 08:38

If people don't have TV do they sit and talk though or do they spend time posting on MN or Facebook which is similar to watching TV and not really a constructive activity.

Kescilly · 09/06/2018 08:39

@BackToTheFuschia7 have you considered Chromecast? We use that to cast various apps to our TV, never been hooked up to aerial.

I’m another one who doesn’t find it odd if people don’t keep a tv but would never get rid of one to watch things individually on tablets.

stargirl1701 · 09/06/2018 08:39

No. YANBU. We have one small TV but it's not in the living room. No TV upstairs though either.

BeyondThePage · 09/06/2018 08:39

We only have one TV - it is in the living room. We choose what to watch together. We all have very different viewing preferences and this is fantastic - it means that we all watch much more varied TV than we would if each doing it separately.

We all like a good film. DH likes nature programs, I like politics or documentaries on food or travel, DD17 likes dystopian fiction or manga, DD15 likes reality TV or comedian stand up. We all gain by watching others' preferences sometimes.

We all have our box-sets... DH and I watch The mentalist together, DD15 and I watch Grey's anatomy, DD17 and I watch The Handmaid's tale, DH and DD15 watch Castle, DH and both DDs watch Rick and Morty. It is nice to share our viewing.

themagicamulet · 09/06/2018 08:41

We don't have a TV either anymore. Finally got rid of it about a year ago. TV reception has always been really poor in this house and we didn't really watch enough to make paying for cable worthwhile. We do watch online and have netflix etc. Still watch some things together but dcs are teenagers so mostly out and about these days anyway. I like the extra space it gives us and I don't miss the tangle of dusty wires...

Original poster
mrsm43s · 09/06/2018 08:41

Sorry, I should clarify - there's not a tv in every bedroom.
There's one in our bedroom, and one in the upstairs spare room. Not in the children's bedrooms.

DH and I do watch the one in our bedroom, we tend to watch half an hour or so of tv before we go to bed at night.We favour documentaries, but watch a few comedy shows too. Children watch very,very little tv (their choice) and if they ever do, they will tend to use their tablets/phones to stream it.

DS's x-box is set up in the spare room, and that's what that tv is mainly for. If we (extremely rarely) decided to watch film as a family, we'd do it in there. But that happens perhaps 1 or 2 times a year.

We removed the tv from the living room because it was never used, and for no other reason. But so many people make snide comments about us not having a tv in the living room - this thread shows that too!

I do think that mindless tv watching doesn't really happen so much any more. Any tv that anyone in this house watches is selected because someone actively wants to watch that programme. Growing up, I remember the tv going on and then not going off until everyone went to bed - regardless of what was on.

OP posts:
PlatypusPie · 09/06/2018 08:44

Our viewing habits have changed as well - it would be vanishingly rare for us all to deliberately sit down together and watch a TV programme and certainly not all through an evening like my parents used to. We do have a TV in the living room but it hardly seems to be on nowadays. Goes on for the news or specific programmes that some wants to watch. We will be in the same room - maybe one reading, or doing a crossword or another watching a film or catch up with earplugs on a tablet, or my DD on her phone so we are companionable but not watching the same thing.

The only bedroom TV is in the spare room, that I watch low brain level stuff on whilst ironing ( I mean nothing too engaging so that I don’t scorch things !)

goose1964 · 09/06/2018 08:45

we only have one tv and would not want to watch tv on a tiny screen

Modern life is weird

Chocolatedeficitdisorder · 09/06/2018 08:47

We're a family with 2 older children who mostly live away at Uni.

We've never had Tvs in bedrooms, and still don't. We have one in the lounge with a sky box. I never fancied having my DC sitting alone in their rooms watching a box, it was much nicer for us all to share the Tv, and either the kids watch something together, or us share in a series or film with them.

Interestingly, neither of my Dc have chosen to buy Tv licences for their student digs and just use their laptops instead for films and youtube. I watch about 3 series a week, and only after recording them as I can't stand the adverts. There's much less Tv in our lives than there was in my parent's lives when I was growing up.

MrsKoala · 09/06/2018 09:32

I love the tv. We have one in the family room. I have mine on all the time. I use it like the radio tho and tend to just wander about doing my thing while it is on in the background. I grew up very lonely so have always used it to keep me company.

We have it on all day for the children too and they barely notice it. Just like me, dip in and out when something catches their eye then back to whatever else they are doing.

DH never had the tv on much growing up and now cannot focus on anything else if it's on. He will stand gormlessly staring at it in the middle of the room and doesn't hear anything being said to him even if it's ceebeebies.

happysunr1se · 09/06/2018 09:38

We have a screen in our open plan living area but it's hooked up to be a computer monitor.
Haven't watched TV for 7 years, don't miss it. No other screens anywhere else.

No one thinks we're weird!

Curlywurlywurly · 09/06/2018 09:40

I hate TVs in bedrooms and none of us have one. Just the TV in the living room.
Although we all have access to the internet so could watch on our various devices if we really wanted to.

museumum · 09/06/2018 09:47

Each to their own. I’d hate to have a tv in my bedroom so we have one in the living room. I’m really not sure why that makes my tv watching more “mindless” than yours?? Confused

LightAsTheBreeze · 09/06/2018 09:55

I actively select what I want to watch anyway, just because it isn't a documentary or something worthy doesn't mean I don't actively select it, I also actively select where I want to watch stuff, be it in the living room or upstairs. In fact I have loads of stuff on my planner which I have actively selected. I also actively select what I download to my iPad to watch also

flumpybear · 09/06/2018 10:12

We do the opposite - no telly in bedrooms only lounge and kitchen for me when I cook

mumeeee · 09/06/2018 12:01

We have a TV in our lounge actually don't watch that much. DH and I watch The Bridge together and would Rather do that down stairs than watching it in our bedroom. DD3 will sometimes join us or she watch a programme buy herself.
She's an adult but we find it good to spend time with her. The same as we did when all the family were at home. Not having a TV downstairs woukd have meant they would have spent a lot of the time in their bedrooms. They did do quite a lot of that anyway. But watching a film together meant they spent some time with the family.

Original poster
mrsm43s · 09/06/2018 12:06

Sorry - "mindless" doesn't refer to which room the TV is in. It refers to the act of switching it on as soon as you get in, and having it constantly blaring out any old rubbish that no one has actively chosen to watch, and not switching it off til bedtime. This seemed pretty prevalent in most family homes in the 70s/80s/90s, but I think that our TV watching habits have evolved and few people do this now. As a result of the way that TV is now streamed/catch up etc, and the prevalence of personal devices, most families viewing habits have changed quite significantly.

So a TV in the living room became surplus to requirements for us - not because we don't watch TV, or don't like TV, but because the way that we consume TV has changed. But honestly, people are really snippy about it - the amount of negative comments we get, accusing us of being snobby/virtuous/too good to watch tv etc when they come in and see there's no TV in the living room. And this thread shows that too - people are definitely reading an attitude that I don't have into these posts.

I guess I'm really surprised that, given how TV has changed people are so astonished that we don't have a TV in the living room, and read so much into it. To me, the act of the family routinely sitting round watching TV seems quite outdated, and it seems obvious with all the technology available that we're moving away from all sitting round watching the TV in the living room.

OP posts: