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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

We don't have a TV in our living room anymore. AIBU?

184 replies

mrsm43s · 08/06/2018 23:26

So many people think its weird!

We have plenty of tvs in the house! Our bedroom, upstairs spare room, plus everyone has a tablet or a phone or a laptop or some other way of watching TV if they want to.

We don't have a tv downstairs.

AIBU to think that the days of everyone round the telebox to watch mindless crap are over?

TV itself is fine, but its OK to not make it the centre of your life and family!

OP posts:
LRDtheFeministDragon · 09/06/2018 00:36

I would find it odd you had so many TVs/devices and not one in the living room, yes. Clearly you all like watching TV a lot, so why not have it in the living room? We had a TV in our bedroom while we had a newborn, and although it was a godsend when she kept waking up, it did feel a bit grotty and I am glad we're past that stage.

ILostItInTheEarlyNineties · 09/06/2018 00:38

I think it's an odd statement to make.

So instead of gathering in the living room to watch something, you're all flocking off to different rooms to watch individual things on all your various devices?
Is it not "mindless crap" if you're watching it upstairs in the spare room or on a laptop then?

Sorry I'm not getting this.

ferrier · 09/06/2018 00:44

Each to their own I say.
As a family we watch quite a lot of things together - big sporting events, films, GoT, etc so there's no way we'd get rid of the lounge TV. And there are none in the bedroom because beds are not the most comfortable places for watching TV from and anyway I'd fall asleep.
But if it suits you, just do it!

BackToTheFuschia7 · 09/06/2018 00:47

YANBU. I haven’t had a TV for over two years. Ironically, I’m just sorting one out now but plan to use it as a way to watch individual programmes from my tablet on a bigger screen. Haven’t figured out how to do this yet! Won’t bother to hook it up to the aerial.

ILostItInTheEarlyNineties · 09/06/2018 00:51

I'm not seeing why everything has to be mindless crap or the centre of family life just because you have a tv in the main room? You can switch it off and play Monopoly if you want.

I mean it's fine not to have a tv there but I sense you're boasting a bit and sneering at people that do? Grin

MrsDilber · 09/06/2018 00:52

I think tablets make you insular and is not a family participation activity like all watching the tv together is.

flowerpicture · 09/06/2018 00:53

I'm afraid we're one of those families that has a massive Smart tv in the living room, kitchen, and all bedrooms...

BettyBooJustDoinTheDoo · 09/06/2018 00:59

So if you all want to watch the same programme, sporting event, news whatever you all go and sit in your separate spaces? Yes I do find that odd and not conducive to family life. I can understand you not having a tv at all, but your set up is bizarre, and not all tv is mindless crap either, what a sweeping statement.

BettyBooJustDoinTheDoo · 09/06/2018 01:03

I agree lost I imagine the OP likes to give the impression they don’t watch tv to outsiders when in fact they are all squirrelled away in their separate spaces watching love Island!

MakeItStopNeville · 09/06/2018 01:22

We don't have a tv in our living room either. I like having that section of the house free from noise.

That said, we have 3 other communal rooms that have a tv in...in fact the games room has 2! Grin

Bejazzled · 09/06/2018 01:24

We're the opposite. No TVs upstairs (in bedrooms) although we do have 3 downstairs.

FrustratedTeddyLamp · 09/06/2018 01:29

Th idea of this actually makes me sad it's essentially " we don't all spend time together watching mindless crap with some conversation, we're all in separate rooms watching it" and for many it's a focal bonding time with family which has now gone. It's cool if TV is very small amounts of family time but I feel like it's not for most families

StillMedusa · 09/06/2018 01:30

No TVs upstairs here. I just have never felt the need, and didn't want the kids leaving tvs on in their rooms, so we have just the one downstairs.. 6 adults in the house (cos no one can afford to leave home where I live!)
Some days it doesn't even go on once, as we all work different hours! However at weekends we often sit together to watch a film and I like that.
However I am glued to my laptop so it's not a snobbery thing, there just isn't much on TV we can be bothered to watch!

Puffycat · 09/06/2018 01:37

It’s not always mindless crap! We have our TV in the lounge and often all settle down to watch the latest David Attenborough together.
I won’t have a TV in the bedrooms at all.
TV can be educational as well as mindless, I think the lounge where everyone can come together.

AjasLipstick · 09/06/2018 01:54

We don't either OP....haven't for two years now. Nobody watches it since we moved to Oz and can't afford Foxtell....which is like Sky but more expensive!

It's much nicer now without the big ugly box!

AjasLipstick · 09/06/2018 01:55

TeddyLamp not at all! We still watch things as a family...but on a computer which is in a spare room and has a lot of beanbags etc. Or we sit together whilst DD has her tablet and I have a laptop....we shop online together too.

AjasLipstick · 09/06/2018 01:57

BettyBoo there's only one thing we all watch together and it's something on Netflix....none of us watch sport and films..we choose our own.

I will watch cartoons with my ten year old sometimes and DH will snuggle with her to watch a movie of her choosing.

At night, DH and I occasionally watch something on Netflix together. It's no different to a TV but it's more mobile.

Sundance65 · 09/06/2018 04:50

We did this for many years when my children were young. We did not have a TV downstairs but one in my bedroom only connected to a video. This meant no TV at all most of the time but wet Sundays etc we could all curl up in my bed and watch a film. It was total bliss.

We used to bring the TV down for olympics/world cup and one time did this and it never went back up but the habit of watching TV was broken and even now 20 years and fully grown adults later none of us watch much.

But this was before iPad and screens for everyone. It would be much harder now and I would hate everyone in different rooms on different screens. Mine did not have Tv's in their rooms until teenagers.

But the world is different now - I would say give it a go. You're not selling your soul to the devil - you can just switch back if it doesn't work.

Birdsgottafly · 09/06/2018 05:17

Me and my youngest have always bonded over our shared love for Horror/Supernatural Stuff. (With my middle one it would be fashion/makeup/shopping) When she was at primary school, we would watch a lot of nature programs, including Dinosaurs and history documentaries. She has a level of learning difficulties, so it was a good way to gain knowledge. We have always talked about what we watch. She is still at home and now we've gone through nearly all the cult 80's films, we are now onto Box Sets. We are currently going through "Lost", which she was to young to watch when it was released.

Our living room is the most comfy way of watching, on a decent sized television. We have food/takeaways, or a drink whilst we watch.

You have separate devices and a TV room, as such. You've made a big investment in activities that you describe as "mindless".

We don't bother with TVs in the bedroom.

I'm looking forward to re-watching all the Films from mine and my children's childhood, with my GC.

I think not coming together is shame, people aren't eating together, or fully interacting. I can't help feeling that it's part of the reason why the under 16's Mental Health is dropping. If you have Family hobbies that you all do together, then that make up for it, in part.

FindoGask · 09/06/2018 05:48

When I was at school I always thought families with no TV were exotic and bohemian - I don't think I've changed that view much! I come from a family of devoted telly-watchers and my husband claims eyesight problems if he has to play his playstation on anything less than eleventy gazillion inches, but if I had my way we wouldn't have a telly either. I literally never watch it. I do watch netflix, amazon and iplayer stuff, but on my laptop.

WhoKnowsWhereTheW1neGoes · 09/06/2018 07:21

We still all spend time together TV in the living room most days. Mostly its films, documentaries, comedy series etc, not mindless crap. Mind you I don't think there's anything wrong with everyone sitting together enjoying a bit of mindless crap, better than all scattered round the house not seeing each other for hours on end.

Canwejustrelaxnow · 09/06/2018 07:27

What's all your furniture pointed at?

NormHonal · 09/06/2018 07:32

YANBU. I had this conversation with an architect whose starting point for designing a room appeared to be “where is your TV going”.

We do have a big TV in the living room for now, but I suspect that won’t be the case in years to come. I rarely switch it on in the evenings and watch things on my laptop.

Likewise we shocked a few workmen when asked where the TV would go in each bedroom. Why would we do that when tablets exist?

LightAsTheBreeze · 09/06/2018 07:35

You can watch TV where you want but watching on a tablet or another room doesn’t suddenly make it not crap TV. I watch the lounge tv and DH watches his sport and old films upstairs but it doesn’t make it any less crap. We rarely watch together as we like completely different things. When DS lived with us, he used to watch with me as we both like box sets.

OhYouBadBadKitten · 09/06/2018 07:38

Watching tv is for us a shared experience usually. It's nice to snuggle on the sofa together. We don't have tvs elsewhere and it's rare for any of us to watch anything on tablets.