Music teacher used my daughters clarinet and then expected her to play it

[HarrietSpecter]

AIBU? I was horrified. Isn't this totally unhygienic??

She also said that the smell left on it made her nauseous and almost sick.

It was a supply teacher at school, so not her usual teacher.

Should I say something to school, or am I being unreasonable?

I'm a clarinet teacher and I'd never do this because if hygiene implications (it works both ways!) However, I have witnessed another teacher do it when shadowing a lesson and also had my teacher at music college do it so it does happen. That doesn't make it right though.
If I need to check a pupil's clarinet I use my own mouthpiece. It's obvious by looking at a reed if that's the problem or, indeed, just by trying another. In the case of the teacher I saw using a pupil's clarinet, she was just demonstrating something and didn't bring her own to lessons which isn't acceptable in my opinion.
Re bagpipe lung, it's very important to pull through the clarinet each time after playing and clean the mouthpiece every so often with soap and water. (Not the rest of the clarinet though!) I've been surprised over the years how many teachers don't mention this to pupils and I've found if they then move to me for lessons they have foisty smelling clarinets and, in some cases, mouldy reeds!

Neither Hep B or C are spread through saliva.

Does your DD have her own, exclusive cutlery? Has she never eaten in a restaurant? Once something has been cleaned it is no longer dirty. I assume they are antiseptic wipes?

What a big fuss over nothing.

I hope she wasn't as rude to the teacher as you sound here.

That's horrible. It's the reed - as others have said, it's porous and meant to absorb spit (they start off really rigid and hard to play and they soften up over a week or so). My clarinet teacher carried a clarinet mouthpiece about with him and would swap it out with mine if he wanted to play me something on my clarinet.

Grateful for everything

mouldy reeds

Yuuuuuck (not envy)

gratefulforever
(bloody autocorrect)

I'm a clarinet teacher, and I would never do this. Aside from the fact that I think it's so unhygienic, I would catch everything going around!

One of my teachers used to play my clarinet and I hated it. If I need to check a students clarinet I always put my own mouthpiece on it.

I've seen plenty of mouldy reeds and mouthpieces. Regardless of who is playing it, make sure she always takes the reed off each time she plays it and get her a pull through to swab it afterwards to keep it nice.

pengggywn using cutlery in a restaurant isn’t the same at all.
Cutlery has been washed in a high temp dishwasher.

The OPs daughter had to put it in her mouth straight from teacher playing it without it being washed or wiped.

It honestly sounds like she's not cut out for playing a wind instrument, if she's that worried about saliva.

Perhaps she should consider switching to the violin/cello.

I played a wind instrument at school. Our teacher told us to never ever share instruments under and circumstances. I'm surprised that people think it is ok. It's tantamount to a teacher taking a swig out of a students bottle and then expecting them to drink from it.

In the early to mid 80s, my friend's clarinet teacher used to take a drag on a cigarette, then exhale the smoke down her clarinet so she could see which holes were stopped. The lesson was in a tiny little boxroom with one tiny window too...

Omggggg I still remember when my saxophone teacher played mine. And the smell left behind on the reed was just horrific. We're talking at least 18 years ago and I still remember.

I also have huge cold sore phobia so I understand your concerns.

But I do think it's normal practice. My teacher was great. Just... breath. Woah.

I would've always taken my reed out and took it home, never shared a mouth piece, that disgusting!

YANBU, that's minging. I won't even drink out of a bottle or a cup someone else has been drinking out of, and I would not have used that after this teacher had used it (if I had been your daughter.) Call me what you like; it's my right to be grossed out by it.

Yes complain.

I am actually a woodwind teacher. I started with one instrument then bought a clarinet to be able to demonstrate on that... I had no intention of using a pupil's and wouldn't be impressed at this. I equally wouldn't let a child use my mouthpiece. YANBU

Well said @ellesbellesxxx ^

The people saying the OP needs to get a life, and grow up, and get over herself etc etc, are just illustrating how little they know about things like this. What the teacher did is utterly wrong - and gross - through and through, (for many different reasons,) and it's not unreasonable to think that. And the comparisons people are attempting to make (like do you use cutlery in a restaurant PMSL!) are just daft.

And how come the people who think what the teacher did is OK, are being so rude and obnoxious towards the people who DO think it's gross? People are allowed to have different opinions to you you know!!!

I don't see the people who think what the teacher did is gross, attacking the people who think it's OK. Stop being so rude. I bet you would never talk to people like that in real life!

Ew no, I wouldn't share a reed with anyone.

My teacher occasionally wanted to show to me how to play proper legato and would turn the mouthpiece around so I could blow and she could play the notes - that worked fine.

The cutlery comparison is bizarre. I'm sure the person who made it wouldn't be happy to use cutlery that had been licked by a random then just handed back to him/her.

Btw yes the video Verbena linked to shows terrible embouchure , but that wasn't her point. Some people weren't getting it. gilly you're quite correct though, you don't bite - the top teeth do touch the mouthpiece but lightly - and the top lip isn't tucked under but just drawn in - it fucking otherwise, as the bottom teeth dig in.

Exactly Semster, had this adult male teacher kissed her that would be abuse and he would rightly be out of a job and prosecuted, but in terms of saliva swapping he may as well have done. It's violating. The DD kissing a same age lad is irrelevant.

Completely normal practice for music teachers.

Is she really cut out for learning an instrument like the clarinet? Would she be better with something like a violin or cello? Or would she feel sick if the teacher touched it?

@chickenowner

Demonstrating on an instrument is Normal practice but I don't know a woodwind teacher (myself included) who would use a child's mouthpiece.. not normal practice at all.