....to be annoyed by my son's Father's Day song

[artmo]

So my son is 5 and is practising songs for a little Father's Day concert the school are doing for the dads next week. So last night he's just singing along to himself and he sings....
' don't tell mum cos she'll get cross. In our house my dad's the boss....'

I just really don't think it's ok but not sure! Don't really want him thinking that, or singing that or even really considering the idea of there being a boss at all in the house. I know it's a joke but....

I’m not usually one to complain about things at school but would be emailing the head. Totally inappropriate message for a school to be giving out. If you get no joy email the governors (I’m a governor!)

I'm sorry I obviously didn't read the op properly

Can we have the full lyrics for this awful song please?

Definitely email the head. In what way is it ok for a school to reinforce sexist misogynistic stereotypes like this?!

Meet my Dad
He is great
He sometimes let me stay up late
Just don't tell mum she might get cross
But in my house my Dad's the boss

Jesus wept

That's bad. What are they going to sing for Mother's Day get back to the kitchen where you belong... la, la, la, laaaaa

You must live in a nice area where the majority of Mums and Dads are still together. My DC's school avoided Father's Day like the plague as the majority didn't have one around!

My DD stays with her Dad every weekend, I can see her singing this then sticking 2 fingers up to him - she's a delight

I suspect the lyrics are quite factual. Luckily I as 'Mum' don't have to get cross any more as I'm free of all that shit.

How about asking them to change it to:

My Dad is so cool and so is my Mum,
I'm happy to have them,
but Dad always forgets Mother's Day,
Mum never forgets Fathers Day,
because she's the tops and
quite honestly, he's a bit of a smug arsehole on one day of the year.

It's a hit parade favourite to be for sure!

It's an interesting one. On the one hand, it's obviously a joke. The song itself is also probably at least 20 years old, probably longer, and the school have just kept using it every year without second thought.

However, those lyrics in particular probably aren't acceptable in the current climate. I'm not sure I'd be going in all guns blazing contacting headteachers though, it won't have been used with any malice either by the school or the original songwriter.

I'd complain to the head too. It's awful! He might have to sing it but you can teach him how there's no boss in your house because you're equal partners and that's how it should be.

I'd be more concerned that many kids don't have fathers around to sing to.

Songs pretty shit as well though.

I would definitely be complaining and I'd be making the complaint from both DH and I - how have teachers in the school thought it acceptable?!

We live in a very diverse area and Ds2's school don't do activities that make assumptions about family structures. Mother's Day and Father's Day go equally unmarked. It's a good thing actually as it avoids upsetting or confusing children and families can do these things themselves if it's appropriate.

Thankfully our school doesn't do fathers fay as it's not a religious day whereas Mothering Sunday aka Mother's Day is celebrated in our church and school. All the women in church get a bunch of daffodils from the children. It's a lovely service. My ds doesn't have a dad as such so I'm very glad they don't do father's useless selfish bastard who's seen him once in 3 years day.

It’s bloody awful and needs to be challenged.

Meet my teacher
She’s not great
She teaches us to be misogynistic...

We had a Mother’s Day song last year that roughly went

I love mummy
I love mummy
Mummies are for hugging
Mummies are for hugging

I did think at the time that was a bit “off” as daddies are also for hugging (and both can do much more than hug) but it’s nowhere as near as bad as that Father’s Day song!

^Fathers Day is fun for me
Because I get to celebrate the Patriarchy^

Going to go against the grain here and say that while it’s obviously not good I don’t think it’s worth of more than an raised eyebrow and I would maybe use it as a talking point to chat about sexism with my child.
Seriously complaining about a line in a Father’s Day song would make you THAT parent imo. Save your conversations with the school for things that are actually causing an issue for your child and you will have more chance of being taken seriously and listened to imo.
If I was up at the school about everything that gave me cause to eye roll I’d live there!

“Save your conversations with the school for things that are actually causing an issue for your child and you will have more chance of being taken seriously and listened to imo.”

That is an awful thing to say. You assume there will be bigger things to complain about. All this “Don't complain about sexism because when your child is stabbed they’ll call you THAT PARENT “ is bad advice. Pull them up on their awful methods and make them do better.

We haven't had a dad in our house since 2009 when the dc were 5 and 3.
I wonder who the boss is here

I would maybe complain about sexism if it was an actual real life example of it. But them singing an outdated song? Really? Some people have a lot of time on their hands if that is worth an official complaint!
I would be very surprised if the op had nothing more important than this to speak to the school about during her child’s school years. There is plenty of scope between ‘outdated song lyric’ and ‘stabbing’.

I think it's one line in one song and he obviously has a different real life experience at home. Singing it probably won't turn him to a life of misogyny.

The first three lines of the song are fine. It's the last two lines that are problematic.

The school will probably say 'the children suggested those words, it's all their own work...'

Fair enough - but schools have an obligation to challenge outdated thinking.