To be irritated by new partner being dopey?

[MadJanice]

Been seeing someone for a few months. He often says weird stuff or asks daft questions and I find it really annoying. I don't know if he's trying to be funny or what but it's getting on my nerves.

Example last night he came around to my house for the first time. Spotted the dog and shouted loudly "oh a dog!!!" As if he didn't know I had one. I've mentioned the dog loads of times. He then said "is it real?" so I laughed awkwardly and just ignored him. He started playing with it, it got excited and started barking so he shouted "what is he saying???!" so I said "what??" And he said "he's speaking to me! What is it saying??!" So I just said "probably telling you to piss off!" So he looked shocked and said "really??"

I can't tell if he's joking or not, surely he must be but if I don't answer him he keeps asking as if he's been serious. Other times he can be perfectly normal but then you get scenarios like that and I find it really dull and irritating.

AIBU to tell him to pack it in playing the fool?

Sounds like you’ve got an incompatible sense of humour really - what you find annoying someone else might find funny. Nothing worse than thinking you’re light heartedly joking around to see someone else staring at you like you’re an idiot.

Agree with pp. You don't sound compatible. Imagine how irritated you will be by him in a few years!

He is already annoying you this early on, why bother? Just find someone you are more compatable with.

This will never stop annoying you I’d get out now

He is trying to be funny but you don't find him funny. I don't think you are compatible.

It only gets worse from here. If you are already finding it tedious then imagine in a year from now starring at his chopped up body in your bath tub after another light-hearted conversation in which he asked you if your bath bombs from Boots are actually real bombs.

Definitely only get worse. Bail out now.

AIBU to tell him to pack it in playing the fool?

Yes, you would be U to do this. Why should he change his personality for you? Or you for him? Just accept it isn't going to work and let him go.

Somewhere out there is a woman who will love his "jokes". Somewhere out there is a man who won't bug the ever-loving crap out of you - go and find him!

@VladmirsPoutine

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He's either a bit dim or you don't get each other's sense of humour. Either way it sounds like you might not be totally compatible!

If you are irritated by him being dopey, why are you going out with him? This is who he is - he's not a lump of clay for you to mold into a shape you like.

He doesn’t sound particularly funny... maybe not the man for you.

For a joke I asked dh (driving through the countryside) why sheep don't shrink when they get wet like jumpers...??
He started telling me some reason his logic had come up with!!
It was a joke you nugget.

He sounds like he has a childish SOH. Deeply unattractive. I wouldn't be able to put up with it.

OMG. he sounds really annoying!

Incompatible

You've just reminded me of the time a potential boyfriend walked behind me 'hilariously' treading on my heels. For five miles. Reader, I did not marry him.

I had to dump a man once for just this type of thing...and he didn't understand when I tried to explain why. He kept insisting that everyone else found him hilarious...but actually they didn't! Even his own (grown up) children kept telling him to stop being so childish (he called it 'banter' 😫). He also prided himself on being 'The King Of Wind Up'...which everyone else called 'cruel piss-taking'. He HAD to go 🤷‍♀️ (oh, and he had stupid nicknames for everyone he knew...he called me Little Boo which I absolutely refused to acknowledge and specifically asked him not to do but he continued...just no!!)

Oh, God, I have a friend with a sense of humour just like this.

He's a great guy and I'm very fond of him, but if he was my partner and I had to spend every day with him then I would be running amok with a machete within a week.

He does have a lovely partner, though, who he gets on very well with. Also has lots of friends. I guess they (or a lot of them) share his sense of humour.

Sorry, but you are just incompatible... let the poor guy roam free and find his own people. They are definitely out there.

This is slightly off topic but how is he your new partner? He has only been to,your house once and you aren't even sure if you like him very much. That sounds like a new boyfriend not a partner.

This might be an age thing but to me a partner is someone you share your life with. Based on that criteria I have had loads of boyfriends who I saw for a few weeks or months or even a couple of years but only two partners.

If a 'partner' developed an irritating habit I might talk to them about it. If a boyfriend had one I'd dump him and move on. They would never make the step up to partner.

I have to say, I think he just sounds very dim rather than funny, but maybe I just don't get his sense f humour either. I just couldn't be with somebody stupid, I am on the bright side of normal I suppose but I couldn't bear to be with somebody I had to explain everything to. Urgh - just like having another child!

Urgh, I'm annoyed at just reading that post.
Either he's got a shit sense of humour or he's thick or there's something else going on.
Either way, I don't think I could be bothered with it.

Tell him you want him to stop acting dim. You're still early stages and if its worth making a go of then he'll take it on board. If it becomes apparent that its not an act, I'd get rid.

The thing is, if you’ve only been seeing him a few months this is the bit where you’re meant to be getting on really well.

Realistically, if the thought of introducing him to your friends and family and having him say weird / dopey things makes you shudder then break up with him. The alternative may be that in five years time you’ll have children with him and explode with rage when he pretends that he’s never seen a shoe shop / can opener / front door before.