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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

...to wonder why they are always on holiday?

80 replies

MrsMuddlePluck · 06/06/2018 21:17

Someone I know seems to be on holiday all the time - must be 5/6 times this year. They are seeing a psychiatrist / physiotherapist for all sorts of issues and can't work but is very fit and constantly abroad on holiday - some very activity based.

With all these issues that they have, why is it OK for them to be on holiday all the time? They don't work.

I don't want to be unsympathetic, but is there something I'm missing here?

OP posts:

Original poster

MrsMuddlePluck · 06/06/2018 22:17

Maybe they won the lottery? Seems quite plausible. Just sayin'

OP posts:

ilovesooty · 06/06/2018 22:18

So it's a benefit bashing thread. Just a slow burning one.

ShatnersBassoon · 06/06/2018 22:19

I can't tell if you're suspicious or jealous.

What is it that you don't understand? They're fit, have no work commitments and have the money to fund their travels. Good for them, I say.

ShatnersBassoon · 06/06/2018 22:20

There's no mention of benefits here, so it couldn't possibly be about that...

Neverender · 06/06/2018 22:21

Sorry but it's nothing to do with you. You sound jealous, if anything, not worried or concerned about them...

troodiedoo · 06/06/2018 22:25

Well off partner would be my guess.

SequinsOnEverything · 06/06/2018 22:25

Being mentally well enough for a holiday is surely quite different to being mentally well enough for work?

Unless I knew they were wealthy anyway or had a partner on a good sallary, I would wonder how they afforded it though.

MarklahMarklah · 06/06/2018 22:26

Without knowing the person it's hard to know. Hopefully it's not the case but it could be that they have a terminal condition and so are doing all the things they wanted to do in life before it's too late.

TyrionsNextWife · 06/06/2018 22:27

I have back problems and find that walking and hiking help to keep me from seizing up so that could explain the activity part of the holidays. If they’re also swing a psychiatrist then they may have depression which could be helped by sunshine and warm a British winters are depressing at the best of times.

And if they can afford it, why the hell shouldn’t they do something that makes them happy! Why isn’t it ok for them to go on holiday?

Pepperypig · 06/06/2018 22:29

MrsMuddlePluck you should know better to question anyone on benefits and their lifestyle on here. For the record I too would be very curious. And to everyone saying it is none of the OPs business, who do you think pays the benefits - the tax payer that's who!

LauderSyme · 06/06/2018 22:30

I think the way you phrased your post may have been the provocation for the 'vitriol' MrsMP.

I mean, why isn't it OK for them to go on lots of holidays? Having issues doesn't mean they can't have a life. Sounds like you think if they don't work, they shouldn't be allowed to appear to enjoy themselves. I think you'll find that what people believe you are missing is a non-judgemental attitude and the ability not to make assumptions or jump to conclusions.

If they are very fit then maybe you mean a psychotherapist rather than a physiotherapist?

savagebaggagemaster · 06/06/2018 22:33

Are you sure he/she isn't a travel journalist?

ShellyBoobs · 06/06/2018 22:33

You’re on to a loser posting this sort of thing on MN, OP.

Surely you know that nothing is anyone’s business, no matter how iffy it sounds or looks, unless it’s being done by someone who might be a Tory.

Then the claws come out.

Original poster

MrsMuddlePluck · 06/06/2018 22:35

Laudersyme - I do mean both psych and physio.

And yes I am jealous - very! At least I'm being honest. If they can afford not to work then good for them. I'll still be jealous.

OP posts:

Yambabe · 06/06/2018 22:36

Well with the advent of cheap flights I have had holidays abroad (long weekends usually) that have cost less than some of my friends spend in the pub on a Friday night. When you can get return flights to somewhere warm for about £25 and an all-inclusive room for about £30 per person per night why wouldn't you?

What people spend their money on (no matter where it comes from) is nobody else's business. Butt out!

Gardai · 06/06/2018 22:37

OP
If you know someone well enough to know they are seeing a mental health professional and know how many times they go on holiday - then just ask them.
No point us speculating

TheOriginalEmu · 06/06/2018 22:39

i've booked 5 holidays this year. in total they have cost me £1700. thats less than some people spend on one holiday. i have health issues, but sitting in the sun isn't taxing. its actually great for my health issues as i get lots of vitamin d and warmer climes soothe my aches and pains. if you're my friend, hi!

AcrossthePond55 · 06/06/2018 22:41

Would you mind saying why you think it's not OK? Is there some way they're imposing on you or do they expect something from you?

I go on 5 or 6 holidays or year. I don't work. I have health problems. I pay for them myself and I don't rely on anyone for anything for my health problems (other than DH). I don't understand why it should bother anyone what I do.

TheOriginalEmu · 06/06/2018 22:43

Depends if they're claiming benefits or not. If they are then it's absolutely your business, and my business and every other tax payer in the country's business. If they don't then great, good for them. Holiday on

so being on benefits means you can't have holidays? as i just said, i've 5 holidays booked this year, but they are cheap ones that i've been paying off. I don't get to go out, i can't drink, i don't smoke, i don't go anywhere really, I don't spend money on clothes or shoes, i don't have expensive stuff, so what money i do spend is on these holidays which make me feel better when my illness makes me feel like a heap of shit. what i spend my money on, really isn't your business.

LauderSyme · 06/06/2018 22:44

PepperyPig There are no capital limits for people claiming disability benefits. You can be extremely wealthy and still qualify, if your needs make you eligible. What I'm saying is, people with, for example, income from other sources, or savings, or an inheritance can still claim some disability benefits (the most generous ones) perfectly legitimately.

And we don't even know that the person is claiming anything.

But hey, let's assume they must be a lying thieving scrounging scumbag eh?

Pepperypig · 06/06/2018 22:45

AcrossthePond55 presumably though your husband earns the money to pay for your holidays or you are independently well off enough to afford them without benefits.

TheMonkeyMummy · 06/06/2018 22:45

Maybe they found a bargain? I have had 2 x 1 week away and two weekends in the last month, with my four kids, and am away again this weekend and have another two weeks booked this summer.

Total cost: £800. Because I love a bargain and hunt around. (Clearly not staying in hotels either. Eurocamp is my friend).

Pepperypig · 06/06/2018 22:47

LauderSyme - I am aware of that. However, surely we all have the right to be curious. I know several people who work and afford 6 holidays a year and I wonder how they manage it.

SilverySurfer · 06/06/2018 22:47

Because they want to and it's none of your business.

CornishMaid1 · 06/06/2018 22:49

The question is why not. If they don't work and can afford it that's up to them.

Some people love holidays. My DM and DF go on a few a year - they are retired, don't smoke or drink or go out that much to spend money so have money and like spending it travelling.

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