What exactly ARE you supposed to eat?

[minniemummy0]

I want to lose weight. A lot of weight. I want a second baby and I don’t want to go through the whole pregnancy considered high risk because I’m morbidly obese. (I had a relatively easy pregnancy and birth actually, no GD, worse thing was a lot of difficulty getting a cannula in, no one could find a vein, and a second degree tear). Despite the fact it was, objectively, very straightforward, I found the whole thing traumatic, I think because it was over-medicalised. I’m not criticising them, they acted properly, but I had a LOT of appointments, I wasn’t able to go midwife led in a birthing pool which I’m still gutted about, I had to inject with heparin twice a day from my first appointment at the hospital I six weeks post birth, and I was heavily pressurised I have an epidural as it would be better to have it in early if I were to have an emergency caesarean, which they acted like was practically a given. I’m sure my ability to breastfeed was also affected by my weight, I found it very hard to position her and latch, which was an enormous disappointment. I think I have developed some sort of health anxiety stemming from this.

Now I don’t want another baby just yet (mine only 7 months old). But I refuse to be morbidly obese when I try for another.

The thing is, I really don’t know how to lose weight anymore. People say, oh everyone knows what to do, they just don’t have discipline/time/motivation. But no, I genuinely can’t work out how I should lose weight. I’ve successfully done weight watchers in the past but I find the current system so complicated I feel crippled with anxiety every time I try to plan.

I tried Slimmig world but I HATED the meetings and I just don’t have time as they were nearly two hours.

I just don’t know what to eat and how to eat healthily. Yes I Could count calories. But how do I choose what to eat, how to balance different food groups, what things really ARE unhealthy and what is a fad. Are carbs bad for you? Is sugar? Are protein shakes something people should really be drinking? I really actually don’t know.

I wish there was a scientific diet. That tells me what to eat and in what quantities. And is healthy for humans and will help me lose weight and is sustainable.

I feel, so so down about myself and my body. I want to feel fit and healthy. Please help!! Please don’t judge me for being so overweight and stupid. I know I’ve failed but I need help.

Unusual number of people recommending Team RH fitness Reported - advertising??

Firstly, don’t go to supermarkets. They’re the devil. Crisps in particular just throw themselves into your trolley uninvited.

So order online. Ocado is good. Forget rice, pasta, biscuits, cakes etc. Stock up on beans and pulses. Bulk buy. These will be your new filling food. (Try to keep bread maybe just for weekends. Make it a luxury.) Also bulk buy olive oil. (Butter is great but do not buy because it only encourages baking ...) Never buy anything ‘low fat’.

Add enough vegetables and fruit that you can eat at least your five a day - preferably much more. Choose things you actually like.

You will find it easier to lose weight if you cut out meat. (Because it prompts carbohydrate heavy accompaniments.) Plain, oily fish is good though. Plus masses of eggs.

Oh, cut out black tea if you can. Switch to peppermint or whatever. Can’t explain why, it just works. I would rather eat my own head than give up coffee - but it’s the only thing I use sugar for.

Almost nothing in your fridge or cupboards should come in fancy packaging with lots of print.

During the summer you should be able to work towards almost entirely raw food (apart from lentils and fish, say). It shouldn’t be an effort. It should be enjoyable. Not a ‘diet’ - just your new normal way of eating.

Find your triggers - what makes you hungry? If it's white bread, rice, flour, then avoid

Find what fills you up - chances are this will be protein and fat. Base your meals around veg, protein and fat. So chicken curry with baked sweet potato. Lentil and veg soup with cheese. Chicken and feta salad, oily dressing. Spinach and cheddar omelette.

Eat full fat. Drink lots of water. Avoid processed junk out of packets.

You will have to learn to cook too. You don't need to be a master chef but learning a few salad, soups, casseroles etc will be really helpful.

Read up on insulin and its role in obesity. It was an eye opener for me, suddenly everything fell into place and all my weight problems were explained. I knew why I was putting on weight more than others and why I felt ravenous all the time. Jason Fung’s Obesity Code is good.

You will need to re-programme yourself. This will take at least a few months. At the end you will stop having cravings, lose interest in sugary carby crap, abandon any fizz or sugary juices. And you will feel great!!! Never hungry or peckish. And your weight will stop ever featuring in your worries, it will just be fine, like it’s supposed to be for any ‘naturally thin’ person.

This is not a quick fix. But it is so worth it.

This is a very typical day's food for me and I have never been overweight

Bannana
Porridge
One slice crusty bread and butter with a small slice cheddar
Few grapes
Salmon, mixed leaf salad, watercress, asparagus, peppers, onions, courgettes, sweet potatoes.

Drank water, tea, decaf coffee.

The more basic a food and the less processed is always good. I do eat crisps and cake nothing is off limits but not often .

I have a friend who was morbidly obese, couldn't stand weight watcher type meetings and 'forgot' to diet a lot (eating the left overs from the kids plates and not really realising she was doing it) she basically stopped eating anything but breakfast (two weetabix and a banana) lunch (sandwich with meat and salad mainly) and a piece of fruit, then dinner (high veg portions and small meat/carb portion). Only eating off her own plate, not going back for seconds and not snacking except if really hungry and only on raw veg. By only eating her three meals she didn't forget and mindlessly eat biscuits etc. Good luck OP.

DIETS DON’T WORK. DIETS DON’T WORK. DIETS DON’T WORK.

Anything that categorized food into “good” and “bad” is a diet. Food is food. Yes, some food has more nutritional value than other food, but unless it contains rat poison it’s not BAD for you. It’s just FOOD. You can’t cross off entire food groups in the name of “healthy” eating.

Rant over.

I have struggled with eating disorders all my life and have been up and down with my weight more times than I can count.

Please google “intuitive eating”. Here is a good primer, but in a nutshell: food is food. Eat what you want WITHOUT categorizing food as “good” or “bad”—doing so only sets you up to feel guilty or deprived or “bad” for eating the “wrong” foods. And then you’ll just eat more bc, hey, F it, you’ve already started, eh?

Forget shouldnts and shoulds. alissarumsey.com/intuitive-eating/what-is-intuitive-eating/

Treat yourself with kindness and trust your body.

If it was propoints you got on with weight watchers, check out the Ultimate Food Value Diary’.

It apes the old propoints system, which suited me down to the ground. Because I have it I can’t see the current cost, but it’s not expensive.

There are Facebook support groups too.

Good luck OP. Your diet is responsible for your weight.
Drink water instead of fizzy drinks, a pot of home made soup when you feel hungry. Well it's all been said above really.
You will have more energy and you will learn that crap food makes you feel crap so you eat some more.
Greek yogurt and honey is a healthy sugar hit imho.
Take aways are the work of the devil on your waist line.
Been there done that.
Frozen yogurt and fruit as a dessert is to die for. You can even drizzle a sinful raspberry sauce on it. Or fresh raspberries for that matter.
You don't have to starve or deprive yourself just enjoy the right food.
You'll be out in the fresh air and being more active and feeling so much happier about yourself.

Well done for taking this step.

Liezl Jayne on YouTube had a great video about her weightloss, and although she didn't really have much to lose (30lbs) her recipes and plan, especially the week meal prep, are great resources. Simple, easy, clean nutrition.

I haven't read all the advice and what I read looked good. I think the trick is to eat as unprocessed as possible and stop eating before you feel full. Do not aim to lose weight quickly but rather to change your diet on a permanent basis.

Another rule of thumb is to always buy food with the shortest list of ingredients.

Good luck!

The one thing every (decent) diet plan has in common is to avoid very processed food, and to eat more lean proteins and vegetables/fruit

^^ This is the crux of it, along with watching portion size and having systems and plans in place to cope with the 'need food now, too tired or short of time of think properly or prepare anything'.

You don't say whether you are also cooking for a partner or have any budgeting constraints, both of which can make it more difficult for you.

Try to think of a few quick healthy meals that are of the lean protein and veg model that you will enjoy and base most of your meals on them. A lot of the time it is the thinking and food prep that gets most wearing. I like tray meals - meat or fish and veg in a roasting tin and shoved in the oven. A good book is www.amazon.co.uk/Roasting-Tin-Simple-Dish-Dinners-ebook/dp/B01JNZ6EXY/ref=sr_1_1?keywords=roasting+tin+cookbook&tag=mumsnetforum-21&ie=UTF8&qid=1528171811&sr=8-1

If you are cooking for a man who wants something more substantial, give him potatoes, rice, pasta etc on the side and you either don't have any or have a lot less. Or don't be afraid to let him sort himself out. Put your needs and health as least a high a priority.

If you aren't constrained by budget, why not try some of the healthy, calorie controlled prepared solutions like Cook, Hello Fresh etc, or M&S Fuller Longer range (I think that's what it's called - calorie controlled, higher protein, lots of veg).

Eggs can be a great quick, easy filling breakfast. Porridge doesn't do it for me, but a 2 or 3 egg omelette is a great filling breakfast.

If you are a snacky person, snack on raw veg and controlled amounts of nuts and cheese.

For easy portion control, a matchbox sized piece of cheese is a portion, nuts a small handful. Fish or meat should be the size of your palm. Fill up on veg. There's lots of frozen steamfresh type veg in the supermarkets these days - might this be a low effort way to up your veg intake if you can't face prepping lots of veg?

Would vegetable soup for lunch work? You could make substantial soups with beans or bit of meat or pasta in along with lots of veg and freeze in portions.

Also remember the 80/20 rule. It's what you do 80% of the time that matters. The odd slip up doesn't ruin everything and you shouldn't think of one as an excuse to go completely off the rails and eat everything in sight because there's no point even trying if you can't do it 100%. . Allow yourself one sensible treat per week, whether it is a meal out, takeaway, or higher calorie meal at home.

But in this case, its especially important to remember portion size. Most takeaways and restaurant meals come in huge portions that most people will be uncomfortably stuffed if they eat all of it. So order less, share dishes, save some for the next day or just throw it away. Food is no less wasted when it is thrown away than it is if you eat it when you are already full or don't really want to eat it.

Good luck.

YY to thinking it of a lifestyle change, not a weightloss diet. The reason why 'diets don't work' is that people lose the weight and then go back to the unhealthy overeating that caused them to gain weight in the first place. It's not the diet itself that's failed.

I agree with mash and bangers about fat not making you fat. It's the hidden sugar in all processed foods that are the killer not fat.

Sugar is also hugely addictive.

If you eat what you want as long as it hasn't been processed in any way you will lose weight.

Fresh meat, fish, vegetables, whole grains etc not white rice or flour, not tinned or ready meals.

No fizzy drinks or fruit juices.

People that eat well also eat less and are not fat. They move more too as they have more energy.

I am not one of these perfect people btw but I was brought up like this and I am very conscious I'm addicted to sugar now. I am also now overweight. I am currently trying to go cold turkey and shed some weight.

Op, what are your favourite healthy foods?

I'm a big believer in low carb but that's because I'm not fuss d about spuds n cake n bread so I never feel deprived.

skinny you’re welcome to advance search me I’ve been on here years, not paid to advertise Team RH! It’s a group with a lot of members that’s been recommended on here before so it stands to reason that there’ll be people here recommending it now.

Diets don't work you need to make a lifestyle changes and it will take some hard work, honesty, determination and perseverance on you behalf. It will also require buy in from those that live with you.

The first thing i would suggest is to eat as you normally do now but keep a diary of every thing that you eat and drink for two weeks, be specific and honest eg egg and bacon sarnie ie whats in it- white bread, butter, fried egg x3 bacon slices bbq sauce etc or you pop into the hair dresses and pick up a sweet from the bowl on the counter that gets recorded. Any thing that gets ingested gets recorded.

After two weeks transfer all that information onto a large sheet of paper (or an excel spread sheet) in to groups eg breads, spreads, veg fruits , then review and see what can be eliminated eg opportunistic snacking eg the sweet from the bow at the hairdresser, what can be substituted eg a banana for the morning tea doughnut , carrot sticks and hummus dip for the afternoon bar of chocolate. Also review what healthy substitutions can be made at meal times ie brown bread instead of white, oats muesli or porridge for corn flakes. grains pulses instead potatoes/ pasta or whole grain pasta instead of white pasta etc. greek yougurt for full fat cream.

Fruit veggies and salad must become your new best friends.

Once you have that sorted do a weekly meal plan and shopping list, which you need to stick to. When planning the meals aim for two meat, two, chicken, two fish and a vegetarian for the main meals each week, plan to have some left overs that can be taken for lunch the next day with a large salad. When making the main meal see if you can sneak in extra veggies eg add cauliflower to a chicken curry.

There are loads of recipe web sites that can offer easy, tasty & healthy options which once you get used to you can adjust to suit your own taste, don't be afraid of herbs, spices, lemon & lime juice for flavour.

When shopping use the nutritional panel to compare similar food items using the following guide livelighter.com.au/Assets/resource/wallet-card/LL-STAR-rating2.jpg

Get plates that are no more than 25cm wide and watch you portion size aim to have at least half the plate filled with veg three, a quarter with the carbs and the remaining quarter with the protein . eg chicken curry as above, basmati/brown rice, broccoli, carrots, pumpkin. My reward for eating the most of veggies first is to get the carbs and protiens

Aim to have three to four pieces of fruit per day. I prepare and have x2-3 different fruits on the table for after the diner eg 1/2 apple 1/2 mandarin 1/2 banana. Knowing that these too have to eaten stops me over eating or going back for seconds.

Drink lots of water and watch the alcohol intake. If you take sugar in tea/coffee try a gradual reduction to none or use a sweetner

Be kind to your self if you like some thing sweet have it ... but just a little bit eg 1/2 the kit kat rather than a whole one. One plain choccy biscuit and a rich tea than three choccy ones.

Get your self a cheap pedometer and aim for 10,000 steps per day, if your fairly sedentary now work up to the 10000 over a period of about a month.

Get the Micheal Mosley book The Eight Blood Sugar diet and read it for inspiration and advice ... use it to give yourself a foundation for making the life style changes.

Before you start see you GP to have you blood tested and get a blood pressure measurement. Record you weight and you waist measurement, hide the results in a safe place and then forget about them. You will notice the changes in the size of you clothes and how you begin to feel in yourself. After 6-12 months go back the GP for repeat blood tests and re measure and weight yourself and compare to those ones that your hid in the safe place. You'll be very surprised and pleased with the results.

This will be a process and it will take time and there will be days when you eat the whole packet of biscuits or you go on a night out and have a big feed. Don't beat yourself of feel guilty about it .... remember tomorrow is another day and if you stick to your meal plan for the rest of that week it wont make that much difference.

Get in to the mind set that food is for nutrition. I weigh all my food now and stick to portions and I eat 1000-1400 cals a day but I burn 2400 so it creates a deficit of 1000 cals. You need a 7000 calorie deficit a week to lose 2 pounds. I exercise at least 30 mins a day and do two long walks a week.

My diet

Breakfast: 45g Granola and Coconut Alpro
Lunch: Homemade vegetable Stirfry with thin rice noodles
Dinner. 2 vegan BFree wraps, olive pate and cherry tomatoes.
Snack for the day. 2 squares of 90% Cocoa Chocolate and 14 Almonds.

I have one cheat day every two weeks but I stay under my burned calories.

Portion control, eating less processed foods and exercise worked for me. I started 6 years ago and have kept 5 stone off, I have been going all in recently (no sneaky crisps/jarred sauces or eating what I fancy as I've just been for a run) in an attempt to lose the last 1/2 stone to get my BMI into the normal range before I hit 40.
My plan was a nurse led Counterweight programme but Weight Wise is based on it and is all about portions. I ate so much I was positive I couldn't lose weight on it but it worked for me and it has become habit for me now.
Good luck with whatever route you go for but please don't go for fad diets as they do not work long term.

Make sure you take some of the advice, not all of the advice, or you will end up very confused (and hungry!)

I would second looking at the NHS weight loss page and app (use the link to figure out what calorie range you should start with - it will depend on your weight and activity levels).

Look at your food, the less different origins the better. So potatoes (field), vegetables (field) and chicken (farm) are better than a Slimming World roast chicken Ready Meal that boasts few calories.

Buy smaller plates and when you feel hungry drink water, don't buy any chocolate apart from very expensive dark chocolate, when you crave it melt some onto fruit.

Could you afford Hello Fresh or Gousto or similar? I know it's only one meal a day, but I've found it really helpful as I work ft, have two dc and got stuck in a rut of eating too much processed food for ease. It's tasty, nutritious and they give you precise, calorie counted portions. Not popular with everyone, but a good starting point perhaps in terms of the work being done for you (particularly as you have a 7mo baby), recipe choices are good, balanced meals, they have a range of 'prep' times to suit and will provide exact portion sizes. Then you only need worry about breakfast and lunch. And make yourself a promise to get out for long summer walks with your baby. Good luck op and well done for deciding to make such a positive change.

Losing weight isn’t just about what you eat. Put the baby in a pushchair and go on long walks. Start exercising gently. Cut out one thing at a time: start with fizzy drinks. Swap with squash then squash with water. Substitute each bad food with a healthy alternative. And walk walk walk walk.