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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU bloody “dog people”

711 replies

mumof2exhausted · 03/06/2018 17:05

Ok so I know there are some decent, responsible dog people out there but AIBU to say that there are some absolute arseholes who genuinely don’t seem to understand that not everyone loves dogs?? My 4 year old was recently bitten by a random dog so understandably is little nervous around them. A huge dog has just ran after him in the park (double the size of him) and he was petrified. Dog obviously thought he was playing game of chase. I don’t blame the dogs, I blame the owners. They didn’t call him off immediately just laughed and shouted “oh he’s just being friendly”. This happens all the time. Another big dog jumped up and pushed over my 2 year old couple of weeks ago. And no sorry or anything. Again a “he’s just being friendly ha ha” and off they walked without so much as a backwards glance to check my crying 2 year old was ok. I don’t have a dog but if I did and this happened I would be mortified and would apologise immediately and dog would go straight on a lead. Nearly lost my shit today with the owners but honestly don’t think they would have even cared.

OP posts:
MrsKoala · 03/06/2018 18:42

Ahhh i see you've met my parents. They have a medium sized dog (a setter) and she is totally uncontrollable. She's daft and soft but will run up to everyone, hoik her nose up their jacksy, lick kids faces, doesn't have any recall, snatches food from everyones hands etc. My parents think this is very funny and anyone who doesn't is just miserable or a big baby. Including me, my DH, my sister, and all their grandkids.

They moved to be close to us but we don't go over much as my 18mo is terrified of her (she is scared of all animals because of her). They refuse to shut her away when anyone eats so you are eating as she is trying to take your food. They can't come to us for long as they don't want to leave her, no one wants to visit them, so having her basically ruins everything. It's not her fault, it's theirs.

DragonMummy1418 · 03/06/2018 18:46

Yanbu - we keep our dog on the lead as we know she will jump up at people - she IS just being friendly but other people don't know that.

AnneElliott · 03/06/2018 18:47

YANBU op. I don't understand owners like this. When DS was 2 he was chased by a young dog in a beach. DS was terrified, owners thought it was hilarious - until I picked up their dog ( to get it away from DS).

Suddenly they were all cute corned about what I might do to their animal (I wouldn't hurt any animal ever) and I told them that how they now feel about their dog, is how parents feel with their kids! Hopefully it may have taught them not to do it again.

RomeoBunny · 03/06/2018 18:51

They're not dog people OP. They're cunts.

Greydog · 03/06/2018 18:53

Sadly there are more and more dog owners like this. My last greyhound was terrified of other dogs, was always on lead, and yes - all the "just being friendly" comments were given to us. The last straw was out when day when a woman parked up and let her 3 collie type dogs out of the car, which ran to us - I called to her to ask her if she'd recall her dogs, to which she replied "Why?" - rescue dog, bad experiences, please call your animals - she then told me I had the problem, the dog was scared as I was scared of her dogs. I shouted that obviously her dogs were ignorant and stupid because she was - they got called back then and she took herself off in a huff. I just don't understand peoples attitudes.

Aw12345 · 03/06/2018 18:53

I would never let my dog go up to a child like that but I have to say... It works both ways. Annoys me when parents let their children just randomly run up and touch my dog.

AndInOtherNews · 03/06/2018 18:53

What Romeo said with bells on. I am very much a dog person but shes always on the leader, I always pick up her poo and I would never let her annoy and generally piss off others. I see it all the time though so can sympathise.

SweetCheeks1980 · 03/06/2018 18:55

As a dog owner I prefer my digs to other peoples children and it's not their fault if parents have passed their irrational fears on to their kids.
Just yesterday, I had my 5 dogs talking to a womam with two and a couple with two children approached us, scooped her child up into the air and glared at us as if we had bought the devil himself out for a walk. She said "my son doesn't like dogs". So what? The world doesn't stop because her child doesn't like something.

Aw12345 · 03/06/2018 18:57

@itstimeforanamechange people certainly should keep their dogs close amd under control when in a shop but dogs can sadly no longer be left tied up outside. There is a lot of dog theft now so I would never ever ever leave my dog tied up outside... He cost more than an iPhone and means the same to me as a child.

Locasta · 03/06/2018 18:58

These threads never fail to amaze me tbh.

I went to meet DH yesterday and travelled by train with one of my dogs. I can't get on a train without her as she's my assistance dog. It was a 20 minute journey. Within that 20 minutes 3 children approached my dog without asking even although she had her working harness on Ruby was lying under my legs and not in the passageway. The 5th time they approached I said "she's asleep please don't touch her." I don't know what was said by the parent as I couldn't lip read someone sitting behind me but was aware the man across from me became annoyed, got up and then sat back down. It transpired the parent had been angry that I'd asked her children to stop touching my dog.

It's an almost daily occurrence that people think it's perfectly ok to come up and touch Ruby when I'm in shops/walking along a street or on public transport without asking me. I really do understand it's surprising for children to see a dog in shops/restaurants and on trains/planes.

As I said before, you will always get irresponsible dog owners, however, there's also a hell of a lot of irresponsible parents out there.

LakieLady · 03/06/2018 18:58

My dog does not approach children, or adults, when off-lead. She doesn't approach other dogs, either. She has never stolen food from a picnic or from anyone eating in public.

Please could I ask parents not to allow their children to approach my dog without asking me if it's ok, especially when she's sleeping, and not to chase after her, screaming.

Yes, SIL, I'm looking at you.

Chinnyreckoning · 03/06/2018 19:00

I am in no way above giving precious dogs a little boot if they get too close to my child. I wouldn't kick hard enough to hurt but i don't mess around either if they persist.

Locasta · 03/06/2018 19:02

I am in no way above giving precious dogs a little boot if they get too close to my child

I wouldn't like to be sat next to you on a train with my dog then 🙄

Tara336 · 03/06/2018 19:04

I have dogs and they are lovely as far as I’m concerned but I understand others may not feel the same and act accordingly. However, I came across a man recently who shouted at me from quite away away to put my dogs on the lead which I did straight away. He was taking someone out for a walk in an extremely popular dog walking area who was petrified of dogs. That just makes it unpleasant for everyone and seems silly. Of course any of us can walk where we want but this person was so frightened they were whimpering as we walked past!

Other dog owners can be a pain when their dogs run up and terrify mine and jump up, you get the they are friendly comments but how do they know mine are? Can see that the dog is being annoying and do nothing

Aw12345 · 03/06/2018 19:11

Chinnyreckoning animals are protected in law you know... You can't just go around kicking them because of their proximity to you or someone else Hmm same way I can't just kick children who get too close to me. You may find yourself with an animal abuse conviction there...

CaveyWavey · 03/06/2018 19:12

YANBU I have a dog and I have trained her so that she doesn’t jump up or approach people when off lead. If there are small children around I put her on lead so that the children and parents aren’t scared. Sadly, irresponsible dog owners give the rest of us a bad name. Don’t get me started on people that don’t pick up after their dogs!! I just have to add that parents also need to teach their children to respect animals. Whilst on lead and by my side I have had a toddler hitting my dog with a stick and he even carried on when I asked him to stop. The dad was laughing. He was lucky that my dog didn’t react. She’s also been kicked by small children as they walk past and had things thrown at her. So it works both ways. There are just as many irresponsible parents as there are dog owners.

Original poster
mumof2exhausted · 03/06/2018 19:16

Good to know I’m not alone! I actually don’t mind dogs and haven’t passed on any “irrational” fears to my kids, getting bitten by and knocked over by has done that. I would never let my kids pet a random dog either. All instances have been random dogs off the lead bounding up to my kids.

OP posts:
Ditzyitzy · 03/06/2018 19:18

Most dog owners are responsible, not some. My son has never been approached by an unruly dog in all the years we’ve done daily dog walks in dog friendly places. Yanbu to be annoyed a dog chased your DS though.

underneaththeash · 03/06/2018 19:18

I'm with you chinny - I have absolutely no way of knowing if the dog heading towards my daughter is going to attack her or lick her. DD has been knocked flat 3 times in the past couple of years by irresponsible dog owners - once just outside our hotel room and is now understandably terrified by them.

There is a huge difference between a guide/assistance dog and a dog running unrestrained in a park.

LakieLady · 03/06/2018 19:19

I am in no way above giving precious dogs a little boot if they get too close to my child.

I've known a fair few rescue dogs who were "foot shy", as a result of being kicked. Their response to being kicked has been to bite the foot of the person kicking them.

Maybe you should reconsider your approach.

underneaththeash · 03/06/2018 19:20

I forgot to mention...last time DD was knocked over I asked the dog owner how she would like it if my DH (who is huge) went up to her and knocked her over into the mud. She did have the grace to then put her dog on a lead.

Nesssie · 03/06/2018 19:24

They're not dog people OP. They're cunts.
^this this this.

As the owner of a large dog I am super conscious about not letting him run up to other people/dogs. It’s not acceptable and, like in the case of this thread, has a huge impact on us responsible dog owners.

Panicmode1 · 03/06/2018 19:26

There are just as many irresponsible parents as there are dog owners

This.

I have a very friendly, bouncy dog. I always call her to heel/put her on lead around small children and whenever I think she may jump up (if I see people with food, because she's a golden retriever and would eat ANYTHING!). I can't STAND it when dog owners say "oh, X is just being friendly" because I know that for many people, and especially for small children, who are very vulnerable to being knocked over, it's not friendly to be bowled over by a large dog, which is out of control.

People are people - some are considerate and care about the impact the behaviour of their children/dogs have on others, some (I would possibly say the majority), no longer do, and society is the poorer for it.

Frenchiemamax · 03/06/2018 19:27

ChinnyReckoning and I wouldn’t be surprised if you were bitten for doing so

siwel123 · 03/06/2018 19:27

Yanbu.
My little dog has terrible recall, so is always on the lead because of this.
We have a little garden or dog run areas that the dig can be off lead in.

I find it annoying when owners let their dog off the lead and let it bound up to you.