AIBU bloody “dog people”

[mumof2exhausted]

Ok so I know there are some decent, responsible dog people out there but AIBU to say that there are some absolute arseholes who genuinely don’t seem to understand that not everyone loves dogs?? My 4 year old was recently bitten by a random dog so understandably is little nervous around them. A huge dog has just ran after him in the park (double the size of him) and he was petrified. Dog obviously thought he was playing game of chase. I don’t blame the dogs, I blame the owners. They didn’t call him off immediately just laughed and shouted “oh he’s just being friendly”. This happens all the time. Another big dog jumped up and pushed over my 2 year old couple of weeks ago. And no sorry or anything. Again a “he’s just being friendly ha ha” and off they walked without so much as a backwards glance to check my crying 2 year old was ok. I don’t have a dog but if I did and this happened I would be mortified and would apologise immediately and dog would go straight on a lead. Nearly lost my shit today with the owners but honestly don’t think they would have even cared.

Out of control, off-lead dogs are a menace. I have two dogs currently - one is extremely reliable and walked off lead at every sensible opportunity, but is never allowed to approach or annoy anybody else. He is often harassed by other people's poorly trained animals, not that he reacts to them in any way. The other is not reliable, so he is walked on a lead (and muzzled) at all times - though this doesn't stop people from allowing their loose dogs to approach him.

I have a huge problem with ignorant humans who don't control their charges - be they dogs or children. I've had mothers ask to for their children to stroke my dog, I've said no, and they encourage them to do it anyway. Why ask if you're going to ignore the answer?!

I am nervous around dogs because of a massive black labrador in my face when I was 4. I am a bit better now and have tried not to pass this on to my children - and we have brought them up to ask the owners if it's ok to say hello to the doggy. However it is amazing the number of owners who don't "hear" them say that... or the number of owners who are 200 yards behind their dog...
And the next person who says "Oh he's just being friendly" while their dog jumps up/licks/sticks their nose in our crotches will have ME doing exactly the same back at them with a big smile on my face and I will say "Oh but I am just being friendly".

I think there is a general consensus that dogs are just part and parcel of life and everyone should tolerate dogs being around them and coming up to them. I don't really mind dogs I just don't like dogs I don't know coming up to me.

But what if I decided to have a pet pig, took it out on an extendable lead (or maybe off-lead - he knows when he's being called) and then allowed it to go up to people snouting about them and putting its trotters on them? I bet a lot people would really hate it. But it's just another animal, just not accepted in society as a pet, but don't worry, he's just being friendly, he's harmless.

I actually want a pet pig now

RhapsodyQueen I know where you are coming from.

A new restaurant is opening on a beach near us soon. It will be a fine dining one in a romantic location, so not cheap. Their Facebook page is full of people asking if it will be dog friendly - er, no! If they cave, I won't be going.

We are about to buy a house where they had dogs before. Absolutely stinks - luckily we are in rented and there's a crossover between moving in, so I have time to get ti professionally cleaned and fumigated first... I grew up with dogs, and it has put me right off!

nottanumber
what if I decided to have a pet pig, took it out on an extendable lead (or maybe off-lead - he knows when he's being called) and then allowed it to go up to people snouting about them and putting its trotters on them? I bet a lot people would really hate it
I would actually love this pigs are cute !

I think that sometimes dog owners chose to take their dog off-lead and kind of hope for the best because actually they feel bad about walking their dog while it pulls constantly on the lead, and it makes them feel like they have a 'pet-slave'. The dog would probably much rather be running with the pack exploring its territory than shackled to its owner.

The problem is that the owner all-to-often cannot control what the dog does (unless it's well trained) but they overlook this because they want the dog to have some freedom in its confined life.

Yes they are gross but I accept they are necessary. And their volume is tolerable

So nice to hear that you “tolerate” the visually impaired in public places.

Like I said upthread, I’m glad my friend doesn’t use this site but please bear in mind that there are a number of posters who have assistance dogs and who could find much of the content of this thread upsetting (if not downright discriminatory).

I don't know who that woman is in the YouTube video posted by @RhapsodyQueen but she seem unstable and a little deranged. How many times did she say the word anus and her description of the dogs genitals is just bizarre.
I understand people have strong feelings but Christ alive that's a bit much.

Op I agree with you, there's nothing worse than the 'he wouldn't touch you' brand of dog owner.
I was chased across a park and bitten by a black lab as a small child and have scarring on my legs for the rest of my life.
No amount of being told 'he won't touch you or he's just being friendly' can ease my anxiety when I see a dog off it's lead bounding towards me.
I'm fine now with dogs on leads and I do make a point of engaging with dog owners who seem sensible and I ask if it's ok to stroke them, but that's taken years to get to that point. I feel so confident I'm even getting a dog so I know I'll have to deal with much more of this soon.
I make sure my dd knows she must always ask.
I think it's a 2 way street, we have to teach our kids a sensible amount of caution when it comes to any dog but dog owners need to realise people have real and genuine fears.

Have had dogs for years but not in last 4 years. Having been terrified of dogs DH decided the best way to overcome this was to actually have a dog. He was right. Therefore I fully understand whatits like when a dog runs up to you especially if a child. Surely if in a park/public area the dogs should be on a lead at all times. Can you approach the L.A. about having big signs stating the rules about dogs on leads. Dogs get just the same amount of exercise on a lead walking more than they do running around for a few minutes. As does their owners! Really feel for you and your children.

@manicmij Why should good dogs and owners suffer though?

My best friend has a giant BMD that is very well trained and walks right by her side when off the lead, she doesn't walk ahead and doesn't approach people or other dogs.

If blanket bans of off lead dogs are put into place then people like my friend will have to put their dogs on the lead and the idiots will all ignore the rules anyway.

Dogs get just the same amount of exercise on a lead walking more than they do running around for a few minutes. As does their owners!

Not true. Most dogs need more than a few minutes on lead walk. Most dogs need at least 2 hours exercise per day. High energy dogs need 2 hours twice a day or a good run around. How is a dog going to chase a ball if it's on lead? How would owners teach recall if their dogs are not allowed off lead? What about gundogs who are bred to retrieve? Or dogs who enter competitions like agility or frisbee?

Responsible owners who train their dogs are not a problem to anyone. It's the irresponsible dog owners who cause problems for others.

Most dogs need at least 2 hours exercise per day. High energy dogs need 2 hours twice a day or a good run around

That’s why these types of dogs should not be kept as pets.

Why not Dechasafraisy?

Some people love to spend their time out with their dog, training them to do something useful with their time and energy.

What's the problem with a well trained dog taking a walk or retrieving? These are the dogs that are very unlikely to bother anyone. Why should dogs who don't bother anyone be banned from public places or kept on a lead constantly?

It's the same story as the irresponsible dog owners who dont pick up their dogs crap. They spoil it for the responsible owners. That's why responsible dog owners resent owners who don't pick up or train their dogs. Because of them we all get tarred with the same brush.

Dogs do not need 2 hours a day twice a day. Even high energy dogs.

They need an adequate amount of physical exercise combined with mental stimulation.

A fair proportion of problem dogs are due to owners mistakenly believing that they need more physical exercise when in fact the dog needs to learn impulse control, manners and how to relax during down time.

JuicySwan mental exercise can be given when out. It doesn't need to be confined to indoors.

I can't see the problem with anyone wanting to spend time outdoors with their well trained dogs. Can you?

YANBU - I would never let my (small, friendly) dog approach anyone, he loves children but as you say the children's wishes are more important that the dogs! If a child wants to pet him / come over I'm happy to stop and let them pat him while he's on his lead but no way on earth would I be letting him bound up to people! As well as not liking dogs, loads of kids are allergic to them.

If someone's dog stole my child's ice cream I'd be expecting them to replace it - after all I don't let my horse or cattle or sheep roam around eating other peoples food / property so why is a dog doing it ok?

Lots of very self absorbed people in the world unfortunately, thinking their kids or dogs are the centre of the universe.

Isla - not at all. Of course they get mental stimulation when out and of course there is nothing wrong with being out with your dog.

What I was disagreeing with was the statement that dogs NEED hours of exercise a day. They do not.

One of my kids developed a terrible fear of dogs (that moved on to a fear of most animals and insects) so much so that he ended up having therapy with the camhs team. Some of the behaviour of dog owners would be just awful. Sometimes he would fun into the road to get away from dogs and still they wouldn't call dog or put them on a lead. All we got was 'it's ok, he doesn't bite' or don't worry he's not hungry!'

All dogs should be on leads in public areas unless it's a dog park (I've seen a park with an enclosed area for dogs to run about without a lead).

When I take my dog out for 2 hours in the morning she will need another hour out before bedtime. Even though she gets periods of mental stimulation and brushes up on tricks in between. She has been able to settle herself since before she was 6 months old. If I take her out for 2 hours in the morning and 2 hours in the evening she sleeps most of the day. We have short periods of training throughout the day or when out, depending how long we are out for.

I still can't see why a dog who spends 4 hours a day outdoors, walking, swimming, chasing a ball, sniffing in the undergrowth, practising loose lead walking, heelwork, recall, scentwork etc is a problem to anyone.

She is focussed on me. She is not bothered by other dogs, people, children, joggers or traffic. She is not a problem to children. Though they can be a problem to her, as can other people's dogs when they insist on running up to her.

Don't get me wrong I agree that if someone cannot control their dog enough for it not to run up to other dogs or people it should not be allowed off lead where there are likely to be people. I don't agree that all dogs should be banned from all public places.

Some dogs are a nuisance because they haven't been given any training whatsoever. Some dogs are no bother to anyone because the training and exercise the dog needs has been given. The behaviour of a dog is down to its owner.

I spend two hours in the evening up the top of the mountain. We see the occasional dog walker but no people screeching from afar, "Get your dog on a lead! My son doesn't like dogs!"

It is bliss! I'm off up there now 😊

What I was disagreeing with was the statement that dogs NEED hours of exercise a day. They do not.

You haven't met my dog - a Jack Russell X.

Anything less than 2 hours a day, mostly off lead, and he starts to lose his mind and become generally awful to live with. He's a dog that will go all day and still be up for more. He was rehomed 3 times before he came to me, largely because no one seems to have heeded the saying that a tired dog is a good dog.

I thought (somewhat naively) at one point that perhaps all his improvements were due to all the effort I'd put in with training. When circumstances conspired against us and he only got short walks for 2 consecutive days, it was like we were back at square one again - and he was horrible.

This is on top of lots of toy play and enrichment activities at home by the way. He doesn't even have a food bowl, because all of his food comes out of a Kong, Nina Ottosson puzzle or similar.

There may be some dog breeds and individuals that can get away with limited walks, but others unavoidably do need lots of exercise for their own sanity.

I have two dogs one is 16 and he is not interested in walking any more he's had a few strokes the other is 7 he likes to go out, both cocker spaniels, when I'm out and I see children I will normally put him on his lead, he's ok but I don't leave anything to chance. So he stays on the lead until we get past children!
You have to be responsible for your dogs behaviour.

Yanbu, I'm a responsible dog owner, I love my Border, I never thought I'd love a dog and was proved wrong, however that's my dog.
I'm still not a dog lover and I'm not that fussed about other dogs. When I'm walking mine, I don't want to stop and faff with other dogs, on my own I don't want to be bothered at all by dogs either.
Mine is rarely off the lead and I'm always cautions if I approach people, especially kids as despite his soft nature he's daft as a brush and could knock a child over and lick them with in an inch! Not everyone likes dog kisses even I draw the line there!

The problem here is that in life, there are irresponsible people. Some of them own dogs. Some of them have children. Some even have both and enlarge their opportunities for demonstrating irresponsibility. “Dog people” aren’t irresponsible any more than parents are. It’s daft to call for all dogs to be on lead in all public places. Dogs ideally do need to be off lead for exercise (I have 2 dogs which are on leads/long leads most of the time for various reasons so I take them to a secure field for off lead) and good owners do not let their dogs go running up to toddlers, or anyone for that matter.

In life though, annoying things do sometimes happen. My DS used to be irrationally terrified of dogs. Sometimes a dog would approach him. I saw it as kind of inevitable that in life dogs will sometimes come up to people, so went to great lengths to get him over his fear, introducing to calm dogs in a controlled manner etc. In the end we got a dog, and job done. If when he’s out some idiot let’s their ‘friendly’ dog come running up to my DS, he will be fine.

I have an extremely beautiful, large fluffy, friendly dog. I also have a nervous unpredictable rescue dog. If a group of kids approach us, I always tell them not get close in case little dog is scared and reacts. (She never has but I take no chances) I’ve lost count of the times that children have ignored me, of times when toddlers are allowed to belt up with hands outstretched, screaming so I have to literally run off.

Majority of 'dog people' I know, are completely unaware of how vile their beloved creatures are, and not just with children.

Its funny how everyones own dogs are 'just playing'......really?

Come on dog owners, have some respect, keep them on leashes, muzzled if likely to bite (90% f dogs), and at your arms length, so they cant jump up, lick, or get in anyones space if they don't invite it.

When they are in your home, they can jump all over your fluffy corner sofa, dribble on your leggings, and lick your fag stinking faces....to their hearts content.

LOL fag stinking faces.
I think you need a lie down.