@ithinkididmagic
I think we have crossed wires as I was focused on a particular example, and you are speaking more generally.
What I'm trying to say is, cord prolapse in premature labour at 25 weeks is an unpredictable emergency. Women can't all be prepared for it, they can't all be counselled on it, it is one of thousands of possible emergencies. Its an obstetrician's job to be prepared for it. And in that situation, it is not imo remotely unreasonable to consider a woman's ability to have children in future, as something of probable importance to that woman, particularly where the fetus has a very limited chance of survival. In fact, its the obstetrician's job to consider it. From the sounds of things the obstetrician made the wrong decision. I don't think the wrongness of it is because she was being misogynistic, or lazy. Probably because she was shit scared and panicking and made a mistake. Consent isn't the main focus of that case. It's about a medical professional making a mistake in a dire emergency.
We have to think what the headline story would be if an obstetrician carries out an emergency section on a dead baby and then performs an hysterectomy on a young first time mum (because em CS on a 25 week womb is much more dangerous) who will now never have another baby. Why did she "choose" the dead baby? People would ask.
Or what the headline about the obstetrician who decided the baby had probably died, so decided to wait out a natural vaginal delivery, and then the baby was surprisingly born alive and profoundly brain damaged. Why didn't she act? People would say.
I'm trying to say some scenarios are really, really difficult.
However, if you were talking about a situation with more time (a woman with several days until she gives birth prematurely) then completely, every option that is reasonably likely to crop up should be discussed. Different delivery options, the risks, her preferences. Of course. I'm saying this isn't always possible in a dire emergency and there are many of those in obstetrics. Worse, it is difficult sometimes clinically to know the difference between a dire emergency and a situation that is probably okay. Dealing with this uncertainty and communicating it is hugely challenging.
By the time you come to high rotational forceps vs CS you are dealing with at least a potential developing emergency. The obstetrician may have a strong feeling based on their experience, and that particular situation that one is best. However, I do agree with you completely, that to every extent possible within the constraints of that situation that informed consent should be obtained. Where fully informed consent is going to cost too much time, at least a sensitive explanation of what the hell is actually happening and why! I'm sure this doesn't always happen and could be improved. Advanced discussions do make this a lot easier but there it is back to the resource problem.
Actually I do think that if somehow penis cutting was involved these decisions would still be complex and difficult. I don't think birth injury can be prevented 100% in any world, because childbirth by its nature is risky. Injuries caused by caesarian section are also birth injuries. If every woman gave birth by elective section then more women would die, for a start.
Nor does a disastrous injury occur with every instrumental birth. Sometimes they are a very quick and effective way to deliver a baby. Sometimes an instrumental is a better choice by far than an unnecessary CS - but its going to be hugely different in individual women and situations. And sometimes there will be more time to discuss options there and then than at other times.
I couldn't agree more with you about improving our openness about it, antenatal information and also postnatal care. I do agree also society doesn't treat this with the importance that it should because it affects women and because childbirth is regarded as "natural", "normal" and as though, if you try hard enough nothing can go wrong (a blame and shame culture basically, for those with injuries). However, I guess I'm trying to say, not every instrumental carried out as an emergency is an abuse.