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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To withdraw our offee

80 replies

MigraineMonday · 31/05/2018 20:49

I’ve namechanged for this, as it expecting a right flaming.

8 months ago we made an offer on a property which was accepted. WIBU to withdraw it now?

Reasons for:

  • house prices have fallen massively in our area. The offer is now 40K over the value on Zoopla and much higher than other similar properties. We’re putting every last penny of our savings in and really can’t afford for the market to fall and end up paying well over the odds.

It’s taken so long to complete due to the chain. My DH has moved jobs in this time. The new property will now make his commute awful, although the commute to his old office was fine.

DB is a lawyer and is strongly advising us to pull out because of the above.

Reasons against:
Feel like the absolute worst person in the world pulling out and breaking the chain.

OP posts:
Goldmonday · 31/05/2018 22:35

Am I right in thinking the previous thread the person had already exchanged? Perhaps why this one isn't getting such a flaming

persypear · 31/05/2018 22:39

I would also pull out. You aren't doing it to just to cynically gain a price reduction, and you can't commit to something like this just to be (extraordinarily) nice.

You have had legitimate changes during the 8 months; a job change and reducing the price of your own house. These are every bit as legitimate as other people's life events.

I expect the people in the chain are amazed that you have hung on this long. They'll be disappointed, but not surprised.

Aridane · 31/05/2018 22:46

No, the previous poster hadn’t exchanged

persypear · 31/05/2018 22:47

Was the other thread started on a weekend? I have noticed that weekend threads can be really arsey.

LivingMyBestLife · 31/05/2018 22:52

While I also doubt Zoopla valuations, if you really think it's true then surely your own property has also dropped by a similar amount? So not really losing out, just exchanging like for like house-value wise? You seem to be focused on the property you are purchasing being lower in value but surely that holds true for all the property in the area?

AnyFucker · 31/05/2018 22:52

The op on the other thread was a cynical arsey type. This one isn't...hence the tone of replies being more sympathetic

BrightYellowDaffodil · 31/05/2018 23:00

I don't think you're unreasonable to pull out at all. As others have said upthread, a recent similar post got a flaming because they wanted to gazunder for no particularly good reason. You have several good reasons to pull out, namely your location needs have changed, your financial situation has changed and you've waited 8 MONTHS for everyone else to get their arses into gear. On top of this, you're being advised to pull out.

You can't do something like buy a house to keep others happy. Pull out and find something else, either now or at some point in the future, that does suit.

Notthatwomanagain · 31/05/2018 23:00

No one should buy a house they no longer like/need/suits their family etc
It’s a massive undertaking and sometimes things change and what was right is no longer right

boomboom12 · 31/05/2018 23:19

Pull out, you’ve have to do what’s best for you.

Kamma89 · 01/06/2018 00:37

This is glorious! Grin I took a liking to OP in other thread & spent far too much energy defending her from all the bitter bettys. She hadn't exchanged & was actually wanting to pull out as she thought gazundering(partners suggestion) was nasty. In my opinion people took against her so hard because she wasn't begging for mercy & was quite cool & detached. OP, just like other OP pull out, don't risk your financial security for the sake of others! London market is in trouble.

Racecardriver · 01/06/2018 00:44

If you were my buyer I wouldn't hold it against you if you pulled out. I would be really upset but I would understand and I definitely wouldn't blame you.

User467 · 01/06/2018 00:46

I think this is slightly different to the other thread because OP has been waiting for 8 months......many people would get itchy feet in that time. The houses should have been exchanged long ago, this is what happens when they're not

Moleskinediary · 01/06/2018 00:47

The house next door but 1 is on zoopla twice- one with its name and once with its number. £200,000 difference in the valuations.

AJPTaylor · 01/06/2018 05:54

It is exactly what happens when it drags on for 8 months. Jobs change, values change. Peoples desire to move dampens.
Op if you are going to pull out do it swiftly.

Mummyoflittledragon · 01/06/2018 06:26

Pull out absolutely. One in three offers on houses fail to complete. Had the chain completed within the first 5/6 months, which is already a really long time, you would be in a house, which no longer suits. But as is, you’ve only lost £1k. Not 40. Mop your brow with relief and move on.

SunnyCoco · 01/06/2018 06:45

Pull out

IamtheDevilsAvocado · 01/06/2018 06:57

As someone up thread said;

'' You'd spend £40k just because you feel guilty and don't want to upset complete strangers? Just pull out if it's no longer suitable for you. It's tough for everyone else, you have to put yourself first.:''

8 months?? Anything could have happened... And from what you said it has birth/deaths/legal...

I wouldn't proceed as now your circumstances have changed.... Aside from any drop in price... The location is no longer OK...

A pal of mine had people pull out - one lot cos they discovered the husband was terminal, another cos the woman lost the job that they were moving to, and the other cos their own house purchase fell through...

Life, sadly, happens.... If I had offered 8 months ago on a house in Durham, and in the interim my elderly mum gets ill in Cornwall and I need to move there... Must I still continue purchase with a house I can't live in??

I think people can be very high handed... When it's not you in the middle of it!

IamtheDevilsAvocado · 01/06/2018 06:59

PS... What you must do (morally) is do this quickly.... Personally I would, at the very least, drop a line to your vendors apologising...

londonrach · 01/06/2018 07:09

Reason different tone this op is polite and this house doesnt suit anymore. She be mad to buy it due to distance to dh work. Im not considering prices here but if the house suits op needs.

FirstOfMyName · 01/06/2018 07:18

Pull out. Used to be a lawyer in another life & shit happens. Stuff what people say about doing the right thing. It doesn’t suit YOUR family anymore. That’s what counts.

TheShapeOfEwe · 01/06/2018 07:27

Pull out. It's totally shit and it will upset the purchasers but you can't buy a house you no longer want. Eight months is an absurd wait - you've been patient to wait as long as you have! The system in England and Wales is terrible but that isn't your fault.

Blankscreen · 01/06/2018 07:41

It's too much of a commitment to buy a house that isn't right for you.

Everyone in th chain wil loose money but that isn't your problem that is the risk of moving.

They are not your friends. Pull out.

FirstOfMyName · 01/06/2018 07:44

Your dh has been made redundant- that’s enough of a reason to pull out IMO even though he’s found another job.

Emilie69 · 01/06/2018 08:52

House prices have fallen significantly since you made your offer, so if you pull out, given the delay, the sellers will now be able to pay less for their next house. So really you have helped them save money.

2kidsnopets · 01/06/2018 09:10

It's shitty for the other people in the chain, but if you no longer want the house you can't move forward with the purchase to please them.

If you want to pull out, do it asap.

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