Ice cream cafe has given my daughter a dairy free ice cream.. with dairy in it. Livid!

[Cleothelabrador]

Hello
I don't think I'm being unreasonable, just posting here for traffic.
My daughter is 5, has a dairy allergy and reacts badly when she has even very small amount.
We've just been for ice cream where I did the usual cone/ice cream ingredients check & repeated about 3 times that she can't have dairy. As I always do. Especially as this happened at a different cafe before.
I used to ask for ingredients but it all felt a bit neurotic & I stopped. I'll start again now.
They put some sprinkles on the top which I didn't see & my daughter told me about after severe sore throat, tummy ache, sore skin & swollen eye... I asked for the ingredients of the ice cream and they told me & stated no dairy so it was almost def the sprinkles. We left and then ran into the manager later on & I told him what had happened & he agreed the sprinkles have dairy in.
We swapped phone numbers.
Last time I reported to trading standards and never went there again.
This time I know I should do the same but it doesn't seem enough.
My daughter is now asleep.
Her whole day has been ruined and that's so unfair. Also potentially tomorrow, a day she has been looking forward for weeks, & have pre-paid for an expensive day out & taken the day off work. WWYD?
For so many, dairy can be fatal.
Why do so many places get away with this?

The potential for cross contamination.

Very odd.

Yes, very silly of you to assume that anyone critical has no experience of allergies

Wait

You passed the ice cream to your daughter.

It’s your fault. Simple as that. Own it.

You seem very hellbent on villifying the op and thats strange. She made a simple human error of assuming her non dairy request would be respected and handed it over without looking. I have done the same before and ended in hospital. Human error happens that does not make the cafe less culpable.

the op was distracted talking. It happens she assumed they would have picked the correct sprinkles and handed then to DD without looking. People do it all the time it was a mistake

The Op was with her dairy allergic daughter in an ice cream parlour. Being distracted and making assumptions is poor of the Op, and then blaming the ice cream parlour is awful

Martha

The ice cream parlour made a human error

The Op made a human error

Ultimately the person who suffered was the OP’s daughter, who was under her care at the time. So i think trying to shove blame on the parlour is pathetic.

not hellbent or vilifying. Just asking why on earth you would take an allergic child into a place filled with what they are allergic to and then hand them something to eat without even looking at it.

I fail to see what is unreasonable about that, and I imagine OP actually agrees with me deep down.

I have a child with severe allergies. I know if I was OP I would feel terrible about my mistake but its better to own it. In this instance she was obviously wrong about the cause but never checked that they used a dairy free scoop on the ice cream.
We have to take responsibility for our own children here, we know nobody else will do it properly. Its very hard policing allergies, you can't just assume other people will help you.

highhorse my first post i literally said the cafe made a human error and management should retrain in cross contamination. Op and the cafe are to blame but everyone piling on claiming the op is the only one to blame is horrible. Its awful when children have allergies.

Nobody has claimed the OP is the only one to blame,. The only one making silly assumptions here is you.

There was a thread on here a few weeks ago where the op accidently made her dairy allergic child a sandwhich made with normal butter. I dont think many people were blaming her as it was an accident. Admittedly one that shouldnt happen but everyone involved needs more awareness otherwise people with allergies wont be able to eat out.

It is awful.
We feel for the Op and her daughter who suffered.

Most of us just disagree strongly with her blame mentality.

Well i agree with you there highhorse that the cafe shouldnt be punished but they do need to update their utensils with colour coordinating.

Head. Wall. Bang.

On the thread you refer to Martha, was the OP blaming anyone other than herself?

Jesus its not bloody difficult. Op is to blame partially for not double checking. Everyone is leaping on her here ro villify her. Christ doubtful she will come back now if she cant even vent here about the cafes mistake.

I dont think many people were blaming her as it was an accident

Did she post about how it was someone else fault? or did she admit her mistake?

OP didn't do what needed to be done. If she doesn't realise where she went wrong and instead blames others, she will do it again. It's not about giving out to her, its about her realising she needs to improve her own procedures, in much the same way as the business here does.

A lot of the "chocolate" sprinkles are dairy free anyway so it would be an easy mistake for a parent to make, ie asking for the multicoloured non-dairy ones, seeing the brown ones and thinking they would be ok.

Op I would go to Trading standards if I thought the shop were not taking responsibility but as it sounds like they'be held their hands up to this and are trying to improve their procedures then I am not sure what Trading Standards could do.

Like others on here though, I take my hat off to your bravery - I wouldn't risk a dairy free ice cream from a parlour with my DS. They always seem so slapdash. In fact DS was out with his mates and had a reaction which I strongly suspect was someone scooping out the dairy free ice cream with the spoon from the normal. But I can't prove it and I wasn't there so there is nothing I can do.

Sympathies!

no its not difficult, so you should calm down and read. No-one is villifying anyone and the only one rude and OTT is you.

Im not being rude or OTT you should read your previous snippy comments to op.

I was at a kids party with my friend and her child who is allergic to dairy. He was offered pizza- when asked if the cheese was dairy free then the server said no, sorry...but he can have the pasta. Which was macaroni. 😬
He was also offered ice cream after- friend says she finds it easier now to bring his own food to parties!

The problem is that so many people now 'have allergies' just because they don't like something, that REAL allergics don't get taken seriously.

I'm allergic to celery, and am fed up by the number of times restaurants think it's ok just to take it off the plate or out of the salad. It isn't! I no longer eat veg soup out now, because the chef often uses a pre-mix base and has no idea whats in it.I don't need an epipen (thank goodness), but do get violently sick.

In Ops defence, an ice-cream parlour that serves dairy-free ice cream should know whats in their sprinkles as well, and not offer them to a dairy-free order without asking first. Otherwise it's half a job. So yes, they need to get their act together and take allergies seriously.

I suspect they only offer dairy-free ice-cream because it's become trendy to do so. Not because they actually care about allergies.

it wasn't the sprinkles though.

you should read your previous snippy comments to op

I would but their aren't any

Wow.
Lots of posts
My daughter is feeling better and is now in bed as she is very tired.
Think a few of you missed my update

*HOWEVER I have now been in contact with the manager who stated 'they will now get a scoop that's solely for the non-dairy' so I'm thinking cross-contamination.
I will never ever go to a new cafe again.
Too much risk. Such a shame as I love supporting independent businesses but sadly the best and safest way to go is..... chain (in my experience)

You can go to a new cafe. You just need to ask: whats in the sprinkles, are you using a separate scoop, and watch what she is eating.