Why have people started using reflexive pronouns so much?

[Flippetydip]

I seem to hear a lot recently of "what can I get for yourself?" or "could you send it to myself with a, b and c copied in".

You get something for yourself, I get something for you. I send something to myself, I send something to you.

Is this now considered acceptable English?

Zoella says this all the time and it makes her YouTube videos even more maddening to watch

Prince Harry at his father's 70th birthday thing this week: "You have inspired William and I"

No no no! Even Prince Harry cannot speak the Queen's English!

I wasn't taught grammar in school, so sometimes me, myself and I get things wrong.

Fair enough - so here's a question: if person A says "Can you send me that report?" and person B says "Can you send myself that report?" does one strike your ear as worse than the other?

I agree - it's TOTALLY different in an Irish accent.

hoist I'm glad I've provided an outlet for your fury.

Thanks Eolian

I'm sure I was taught "David and myself" at school but that was a hell of a long time ago! In fact my recollection is that "invitation to David and me" would be wrong - or so we were told.

Sorry, I didn't RTFT, so didn't realise someone had already mentioned that Prince Harry mistake! It made me scream at the radio though!

Because they are illiterate idiots. Sorry, themselves are illiterate idiots. When myself corrects any grammar on here, it's complained about.

would it be correct to say "the invitation to David and myself"?

I'll probably show myself up and get it wrong now.. but it's when the person doing the thing does the thing to themselves.. or something you know what I mean.

So you can send the invitation to yourself but I can't send the invitation to yourself. I did send it myself though. Or maybe Dh did it himself.

My Irish family would say things like ‘I saw himself in town’
Oh, that's totally fine!

LighthouseSouth if in doubt, say the sentence as if it's just you without the other person.

You wouldn't say "me am delighted to be invited to your wedding", you would say "I am delighted to be invited to your wedding", so you don't say "David and me are delighted to be invited to your wedding", you say "David and I are delighted to be invited to your wedding".

You wouldn't say, "thank you for inviting I to your wedding", you would say, "thank you for inviting me to your wedding", so you don't say "thank you for inviting David and I to your wedding", you say "thank you for inviting David and me to your wedding".

And if you use the reflexive "myself" in any of the above sentences, God kills a kitten.

If still in doubt, rephrasing it to use "we or us" often sounds better anyway.

Lighthouse - she should have tweeted “...David and me” because “I” is the subject pronoun, the primary agent/actor in the sentence, and “me” is the object pronoun. When confused, use the same verb, simplify the sentence and eliminate any plurality and you will “know” the correct pronoun to use: “...grateful for the invitation to I” sounds obviously wrong, adding David to the picture doesn’t change that.
Overuse of reflexive pronouns in service industries is rife, and drives me mad, much more so than mixing subject and object pronouns: “Can I get anything else for yourselves?” I agree with pps that people increasingly think it is less direct than “you” and therefore more polite, but it’s just wrong. In time it may become accepted usage but that time has not arrived yet.
There is a waitress in a local restaurant who gives me hives with this in conjunction with constant use of the word “Darl”: “Is that alright for yourself Darl?”. She does it scores of times in one service, she would get the shock of her life if she was recorded for training and watched it back, - not the reflexive pronouns as she presumably thinks they are fine, just the number of times she “Darl”s everybody.

Love, that's just my point - my English teacher would have told me not to say "thank you for inviting David and me". It would always have been "David and myself" and anyone saying "me" would have lots of crosses and red lines through their work.

that's why I'm wondering if it is a generational thing.

The trouble is when I hear things like that on a daily basis it starts to sound normal and I (who used to be pedantic to a fault) become confused about what is and what isn't correct.

Cross post with LoveInTokyo!

Frankly lighthouse your teacher should have been sacked!

I think I watched too much Catherine Tate... 'What can I get you for yourselves today?'

I went to a really posh school too

Lighthouse, it's not a generational thing. Some people (including, unfortunately, some English teachers) just don't know how to use English correctly.

I once had an English teacher who couldn't spell the word "sandwich".

True story.

DadDadDad I do work things out by ear and generally I think I do this well, however, if lots of people start talking this way, people who haven't been taught grammar may assume it's correct.

To answer your question A sounds correct. B does indeed sound a little Irish, but also pretentious, or, as I like to call it, wanky.

I was also told just to leave commas out. I would have preferred for the teacher to try and teach myself (sic!) how to use them correctly, but hey ho.

I went to a really posh school too

It's an affectation, so I'm not really surprised.

my English teachers - definitely more than one with those rules - would never have said "Can I get anything else for yourselves".

I'm seeing the invitation example in a very different way.

Agree that if you say 'How's yourself? or even 'how's himself' with the right accent it sounds fine.

Having just drilled my year 6 class on the correct useageI find it galling that slt are using reflexive pronouns incorrectly. I want to scribble on every notice on the staff room board.

I know someone who does this and also pronounces forward as fore-ward. As in, "could you please fore-ward that to myself"

She is lovely otherwise but it does my head in...

I hate it too. But not as much as I hate it when people refer to everything as "a thing".

"Oh, suchabody did xyz, because apparently that's a thing now"
"Is that a thing? That can't be a thing.."
"It could be a thing"

ARGHHH