Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

I think IBU but could I take DD out of school for this

65 replies

NeverEnoughSleep1 · 15/05/2018 09:43

I do think IBU and wanted to get a MN opinion, my DD is in reception and have fantastic attendance and I would never normally let her miss time off school for holidays or things like that (not judging people who do). So DP has 2 D.C. and we've been having a few issues between the girls lately and it's really affected my DD lots of questions, tears and upset. DP has been spending more 1-1 with his DD and I think my DD needs the same from me.

Problem is I work weekends with no flexibility for time off so I'm wondering/debating if it would be acceptable to take her out of school on Friday and just have a really fun day the two of us something we wouldn't normally do that I know she would love?

OP posts:
NameChange30 · 15/05/2018 10:15

“Not well thought out” Grin
If you disagree just say so - no need to insult my thinking skills Grin

MumofBoysx2 · 15/05/2018 10:18

Do it, I used to take mine out for nice days out when they were in Reception. It isn't going to affect their education!

Sirzy · 15/05/2018 10:18

Surely that’s what half term in 2 weeks time is for?

athingthateveryoneneeds · 15/05/2018 10:19

No question. I would definitely do it, and have done similar in the past.

Zaphodsotherhead · 15/05/2018 10:19

My kids all still fondly remember their orthodontic appointments - we had to travel 30 or so miles to the dental surgery, so they'd get a half day off school with me alone (there are five of them, so individual time was rare).

They have to be the only children who enjoyed getting their braces tightened up, because it meant an afternoon in town with me!

TheOriginalEmu · 15/05/2018 10:23

I wouldn't even think twice about it. Do it. she's in reception, its hardly going to affect her future life to have a day with her mum.

as to the weekend job...of course its not ideal. i'm sure OP doesn't WANT to spend the weekend in work, but sometimes life isn't ideal and we do what we have to do.

Quartz2208 · 15/05/2018 10:24

No you are not and as a short term plan it makes sense

But it is simply going to plaster over the issues which is if you work weekends you never see her and she is having issues with her step sister

InspMorse · 15/05/2018 10:28

Are you not with her at all during the May half term holiday?
Is she with her stepdad and stepsister at weekends whilst you work?

Original poster
NeverEnoughSleep1 · 15/05/2018 10:31

Thanks for all the advice. To clear a few questions

My "poor" DD does get to see me on weekends but as I'm finishing this placement I've got 4 weekends in a row which is why it's not flexible and why I don't want to wait 4 weeks so I wanted to do something on a school day.

DPs DC see their Mum and Dad 50/50 and we're doing other things to work on them issues which isn't really the point of my post.

I'm glad to see most people think it's a good idea I just think it could be really good for her at the minute

OP posts:
steppemum · 15/05/2018 10:33

My mum was an infant teacher before all the palavar about attendance.
She often advised parents to take a 1:1 day with a younger kid who was struggling. Older siblings in school, have a bit of mummy time.

I personally would just ohone school early and say dd won't be in today, you could say she is ill, and when challenged say it was for her mental health.

On another note, if she has just started reception, and you work all weekend every weekend, she may be really struggling with lack of time with you. Reception is a very long tiring year, and many kids start to kick off, and become unsettled during it due to the huge hosts of changes. They do need a bit of extra input, love and reassurance.

steppemum · 15/05/2018 10:33

sorry x post with your latest one about weekends

Slartybartfast · 15/05/2018 10:35

No, I wouldnt. how would you explain it, go after school if you can. she probably likes school at this age.

justforthisthread101 · 15/05/2018 10:44

Take her out. Her mental health is as important as her physical health and it sounds like she needs a break.

NameChange30 · 15/05/2018 10:49

Fair point about weekends, if it’s not a permanent thing and you do get some weekend time off that’s good Smile

Still not sure why you can’t wait until half term though - are you spending half term with her? And does she see her dad?

Mummyoflittledragon · 15/05/2018 10:53

Definitely. Or for more time if that will help. When was she 5? Before or after the start of the current term? Legally if it was after, she doesn’t have to be in school til the autumn term. My friends ds is 10. He struggles a bit sometimes. She took him out for a day recently and before that, it was definitely this school year. Plus a long weekend to Center Parcs.

It is much better to deal with tears as breather days rather than letting it build up to a mental health condition in later life.

MatildaTheCat · 15/05/2018 10:58

I would have loved this so much. Do it! You could always do something with an educational slant for part of the time if that makes you feel better.

pinkdelight · 15/05/2018 11:03

I'd call in sick for her that day and go somewhere nice (and far away enough not to get caught). As it's a friday, if she talks about it on monday they'll think she did it at the w/e. Kids get their days mixed up anyway at that age.

I've never done anything like this and my kids have great attendance, but in the situation you describe it doesn't seem like it needs to be a big deal. Just do it on the downlow and hopefully it'll help ease the issues. If not, obviously you need a longer term strategy that doesn't involve skiving!

Cath2907 · 15/05/2018 11:05

I would absolutely. Fun time / quality 1 on 1 time with parents is very important to a young child. There are lots of educational things you two can do together and still have fun if you feel that is warrented. However personally I'd just relax and have fun.

mavismcruet · 15/05/2018 11:07

I’d do it for sure. Have a lovely Friday Smile

birdonawire1 · 15/05/2018 11:12

Have a lovely day (or 2) out with your DD. She will benefit far more from that than she will lose out from missing a couple of early school days.

DuckbilledSplatterPuff · 15/05/2018 11:20

Another Emma, sounds like she needs a little one on one time. Go for it, she's not about to sit her GCSEs. Reception children do get very worn out by the end of the summer term. If it brings her back to school refreshed and happier, it will be worth it.

beingsunny · 15/05/2018 11:32

I would, I took a sneaky day with my four year old and he still talked about it six months later.
I called in sick from work after a rushed morning and a dramatic fall from the scooter on the way in I turned and said let's stay home and hang out.

It was fantastic, we looked at animals in the pet shop and had cake at the cafe, he remembered it for months asking when we could do it again

pigmcpigface · 15/05/2018 11:44

Tell the school she's sick and have an amazing day together.

The rules are there for a reason, but there will always be exceptional cases. This is clearly one of them.

user789653241 · 15/05/2018 11:46

You know your child best, and I wouldn't think twice. It won't affect her at all in negative way, even if you taken her out of school for a day or two to have lovely time together. In fact, it would affect her in a very positive way, and she would cherish the moments with you.

Luisa27 · 15/05/2018 11:48

Do it!!
What a lovely lovely plan Smile

Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.

Join Mumsnet Log In

This thread is closed and is no longer accepting replies. Click here to start a new thread.