Dogs near babies/children

[Blue2017]

Aibu to think its ridiculous when people say " oh it's okay my dog won't go near the baby or hurt him/her " how can they be so sure?

You can't trust dogs. My dc were never scared of dogs till one collie ran up out of nowhere in the local park and sank it's sodding teeth into my dds leg. She had literally not even seen it, she hadn't approached it, she hadn't startled it. The bastard just ran up and bit her. Cue both kids now terrified of all dogs. Should have strangled the little shit with my bare hands

We have a dog, medium sized but not overly excitable. We do trust her but I would never leave a young child or baby alone. It's the what ifs and you can never be 100% sure. Just not worth the risk.

My DC's are scared of dogs entirely because of thick owners* with their unruly "friendly" dogs. When a child is screaming/ crying at an enthusiastic hound on face level, it's not OK, call the dog off and put it on its lead.

The younger one is fine with dogs on leads, and slowly ambling dogs, but a bad encounter takes time to get over as we don't know any dogs to familarise with. The older one seems permanently weary now

I like dogs. I grew up with big ones, kept on leads because we could not risk them jumping around at other people and bowling them over. I'm not even cross with the genuinely appolgetic owners who act immediately. I accept there dogs who are well used to children and come happily wagging their way over, just take responsibility for the dog if they are causing distress.

Then again I'm riled and ripe for a rant because I've had yet another encounter this morning with the dipshit owner whose dog is "friendly, but just jumpy." Yes, I know your dog is jumpy, I told you months ago to put it on its lead after it jumped up at me for a THIRD time in minutes, and apparently I was scaring it because I said "get down" sternly It seems a nice dog other than its crap owner with no boundaries!

*specifically thick owners, not all owners.

Not just dogs! We have a large cat, love him to pieces, very much a character, great with adults very social, will hiss at anyone under about five, just hates kids.

My dd had a lovely relationship with my mum's jrt but I would never have left her alone with him. I saw her get too close to his face (as kids do) more than once and I had to scoop her up and talk to her about appropriate behaviour around the dog.

If he had bitten her my mum would've probably , at best , rehomed him and that would've broken her heart as well as dd's.

I feel like you are protecting both the child and the dog by always supervising.

IMO dogs and babies/small children should never be left alone together. My in laws have an incredible soppy, aged springer spaniel who I don’t believe would hurt a fly but I have not once left my dd (now 3) alone with her. Just not worth the risk. We don’t know what goes on in a dogs head after all. My mum has got a new cocker spaniel puppy recently (6 months old). Lovely little thing but the same applies, I would never leave them alone together.

I'm not a huge fan of dogs in general. However, my two year old adores them and spends most of her time while in her pushchair or walking around the park pointing and saying 'ooh dog!' very excitedly. I would rather she left well alone but as I don't want to put my reluctance onto her I encourage her to look but try to teach never to grab, pull or poke. Sometimes we'll wander closer and she waves.

We've dogs in the extended family and we're using these to learn to stroke very gently, when the dog is happy with it. But I'm always right there too, and she is moved away when the dog has had enough.

I do not trust any dog (or cat for that matter, my mums cat is more of a risk than most dogs it's bloody vicious!) around any children. It makes me fucking furious that some people, despite my carefulness allow their dogs to bound over in the little children's bit of the park and don't call them off or control them and just shout 'oh he won't bite!' Or 'it's ok he's friendly!'. Get it on a bloody lead! I spend ages trying to teach my child to be respectful to animals, not to touch without permission or invade their space and these sorts of idiot owners just make a mockery of it. I don't care how much you trust your dog, I don't, so - in a public place designated for small children - get it away from us or at least under control.

Posted too soon mid-rant! Ha!

So OP I don't think you're unreasonable. I think you're sensible, and people who are telling you otherwise are being stupid.

I always used to say i trust my dog, but not my child. You can't trust that a small person won't poke, prod, pull ears etc, so leaving dog & small person alone is outrageous. I am all for interactions tho, under close supervision. Depends on the dog...my folks have a dog who is grumpy & wary of small people moving. If they have small visitors he is allowed to shuffle off to find his space, or he can interact; the choice is his. Forcing interactions is dangerous, taking your eye off the ball is dangerous, & assuming because your dog is friendly it will be great with kids is dangerous. Common sense imo

My DD was attacked by a Rottweiler when she was 3. It was muzzled and with its owner (who was a vet!), but it reared up completely without warning and raked its claws down DD’s face. As a child, I was pinned to a wall by a friend’s snarling border collie, snapping at my throat, again with no warning or provocation, in the friend’s house.
I detest dogs and would never trust one near a small child. And don’t believe any shit from the owners about their dog “loving children”. Just ask “Boiled or fried?” and back away...

Our dog is great, I genuinely couldn’t wish for a better dog around my kids but I never, ever leave them alone together.

Sgree op we have a very small placid dog and everywhere we go people want to pet her. Drives my nuts when people tell their toddlers she’s ‘ok’ to pet. She is but it’s a risk I don’t want.

We have grandchildren and never ever are they left alone with the dog or the cat. Not until 9 at least I think depending

Dogs do not think through consequences, they live in the moment and if they feel threatened they may well react with the one of the few options available, which is attack

My dog is very gentle but slightly nervous. I do not believe that she risk to anyone but I have seen children stress her and intervened as she was clearly uncomfortable. I would never leave her alone with a child, mostly as I do not know what the child might do.

It annoys me that some parents let small children wonder up to her, without asking, get in her face and some try to pat her quite forcefully. She doesn't like it, puts her tail between her legs and shies away.

I'm an adult and if your dog runs up to me and jumps in my face I will get angry with you and I'm the size of lots of dogs their back legs. I've gotten some of my neighbours in trouble for not keeping their dogs under control simply because of the children that play in the area.

On the other hand my immediate neighbour's dog is a old sweetheart who has put up with and still does put up with lots of abuse from 4 year old granddaughter. She is never left alone with children, simply as children cannot be trusted alone with animals. My own SD at 7 still hasn't worked out if the cat goes under a chair or hides in a corner not to chase her. The cat has scratched her and drawn blood but she still doesn't get when the cat is telling her to leave her alone.

I am not a dog person. I've had limited interaction with dogs, only when they have been forced upon me and I have had to be polite. One of DH's relatives was super keen to have her daughter's dog meet my then 6 week old DD. I said no. We went to visit and lo and behold the dog was there. Apprently they wanted him to have a practice around babies for when their new baby arrived. Ffs. We left the room for a minute. We got back and DD was on the rug with the dog circling and sniffing her whilst they all looked on commenting how good he was.
To me he looked like he was deciding which part of her would be his next meal.
I have never felt so much fear and revulsion for people or dog.
So imo dogs and babies do not mix.

stripper why on earth would you leave a tiny baby alone with any dog, let alone a dog you don’t know?

Completely mad and irresponsible but of course, it’s the dog that would pay for your lack of care.

@Strippervicar your DH's relatives are a**holes. You don't do that with anyone's child unless they give you express permission and they are in the room.

I trust my dog completely, he has the gentlest, nicest nature. He currently has zero interest in my newborn though and prefers hanging out with 6yr old DS.
I am careful around other people's dogs though, and I am happy to put my dog in another room when other people bring their children around.

@ThisIsTheFirstStep because I went to put my cup in the kitchen and I had already told them no. She was being held by them at the time. As a very naive first time mum I had no idea they'd just do it.
And yes, irresponsible maybe, but don't think I didn't learn from it.

Thank you for your assessment of my parenting.

My parents were like this! Constantly telling me when he's been stroked by a child on a walk etc how good he is, even though he nips them constantly to get his own way. He gets treats to stop bad behaviour! He's such a spoilt dog and he's always got a beady eye on my son, every chance he gets he tries humping him, starring right in his face, and just constantly watching him in an unfriendly way. They've finally relented and agreed with me that the dog is jealous and needs to stay away when we're there. It's taken two years for them to agree that something will happen if the dog is given half the chance.

stripper Sorry but I just don’t get people like you. You complain you are scared of dogs then leave your kid with them with people you don’t trust.

I don’t trust my dog with kids and I love him.

Makes no sense to me especially when the dog ends up getting put down when it was the human at fault.

Agree that you can never be sure. Even in the laid back 70s, my mum never left me or my siblings alone with the dog as babies/young children.

Clearly we adored our huge setter, from the numerous family photos, and he never as much as growled at us kids, BUT he did bite my dad a couple of times (defending my mum during arguments).

Dogs are very pandered to these days though. We’d think nothing of putting ours in the kitchen or garden when we had guests, but these days guests are expected to accommodate the dog! (There was a thread about it on here once)

I grew up with 5-6 big dogs loose in the house and smallholding, I've got six siblings and we were left pretty much to our own devices once we could walk and nobody ever got bitten, but I'm pregnant and have a dog and won't be leaving them alone together.

When I’ve been out walking with my son in his prank about 4/5 times in the last 11 months dogs off the lead have jumped up at him in the pram. Usually with barely so much as an apology, and a comment like ‘don’t worry she’s friendly’ I couldn’t give a fuck if the dog is friendly if they jump into a baby’s pram they shouldn’t be off a lead. It has really scared me and I’d never trust any dogs completely around a baby

*pram not prank