AIBU to ask neighbours to turn their t.v down 4-8 pm so DD can revise?

[Sibsmum]

Hi there, first time poster, please be gentle with me.

Back story, we have lived in our house for almost 6 years. Couple next door are elderly and hard of hearing, both wear hearing aids.

T.v and music are usually really loud - crazy bonkers loud over our own telly- to the point where we know exactly what they're listening to/ watching.

But, we are not silent either, and as it is generally off by 9pm we don't make a fuss. Lady has asked a few times previously if the noise is too much and they will use their headphones.

Dd is revising for GCSE exams and is finding the telly noise very distracting. All our bedrooms and our through lounge/diner have a wall in common with neighbours, so moving her makes no difference.

It has been especially loud music this weekend , which possibly means Mr is home alone. Learned over the years that He tends to listen to music rather than telly, and won't use headphones unless wife tells him to.
He is grumpy and shouty and once had me in tears over a washing line ( another post) .

I am quite prepared to have the conversation. I am asking for turn down 4-8 on weekdays for a few weeks while the exams are on, but don't want to be difficult or unreasonable.

Please share your thoughts with me and any 'how to word my reader's ideas welcome too.

Your neighbour already asked you if they were too loud. Why didn't you say Yes?

GCSE's or not. You are not being unreasonable. That level of noise on a daily basis would drive me mad.

I can’t actually believe there are people in life who think they can tell there neighbours the volume there tv should be at.

Am quite shocked that a person of age to sit GCSE’s would not have thought of noise cancellers in the first instance?

Oh God, there have been some arsey replies on here!

No reason for her to be wearing headphones when the ones making the din can wear them. They'd be wearing them on a regular basis if they lived next to be as it would do my head in.

Good luck to your DD in her exams

I can’t actually believe there are people in life who think they can tell there neighbours the volume there tv should be at

I can't believe there are people in life that think it is acceptable that someone can hear their neighbour's TV through a fucking brick wall. No excuse for it.

I'd tell them to turn it down or for them to wear headphones regardless of revision time, it would drive me nuts and I am sure most people wouldn't think twice about asking teen ndn to keep the noise down, it's no different because they are older.

As some people said, you should ask them to either turn it down r wear headphones.
My mother is hard of hearing and puts subtitles on. Her neighbours don't have to put up with it, the same way that you don't.
It's important for your daughter to be able to be relaxed as well as focused for her revisions.
Tbh you should ask regardless. They know it's too loud anyway.
I understand watching prime time TV can be important for older people, but listening to loud music - probably knowing full well that you are disturbing everybody else- is not essential. He does sound like a nasty man anyway if he shouted at you in the past for something so trivial.
Them being old and deaf doesn't give them the right to invade your right to live a peaceful life.
As for the noise cancelling headphone, for one they can retail at £200+ and why should you change your lifestyle for them.
It sucks that they are deaf but bottom line it's not your problem.
I can't believe that some people are suggesting that your daughter should wake up earlier.
I am new to MN and once again am surprised at the nastiness of some of the comments.
Beyond the exam period, I would try to resolve it with them and if not contact the council. They are normally quite helpful.
They send you a sheet to record all incidents and then send somebody over to listen. Letters are sent to the 'offenders'

Good luck!

I can't believe that some people are suggesting that your daughter should wake up earlier.

I don't see a problem. It's an option, I did that the year of my Leaving Cert - woke up an hour earlier before school, got my work in that way. Suits some people but pointless a week out from exams.

Ravenwings - surely you can see the difference between you choosing to get up 1 hour earlier to study beause it suited your study regime and OPs DD having to get up early because her neighbours are preventing her from studying all evening due to excessive noise.

Both sides are entitled to enjoy their homes. Both sides have a responsibility not to adversely affect other people. I find it so strange how some people seem to think that children and teenagers are less entitled to consideration from other people than adults are.

Glad your NDN was reasonable, OP. Hope it's OK now. Do go and ask them again if it isn't.

Was the afternoon/evening any better yesterday after you’d spoken to them? I hope so.

Thank You everyone for your viewpoints and advice. It was quiet last night 4-8. I could hear that some device was on but couldn't even discern if is was cd, radio or telly. Brilli

That's good news.

Ear defenders are generally somewhat cheaper than noise cancelling headphone. Depends if she wants music or is happy with just silence.

Well done for having the conversation - though what did you say when neighbour first asked if they were too loud?

Lady has asked a few times previously if the noise is too much and they will use their headphones.

Envoironmental health/noise pollution team advice
We are entitled to quiet enjoyment of our home
A. Quiet at night, esp between midnight and 7am, not to hear tv radio etc, or drilling banging building noise. Can't do much about crying baby, other human noises, but should not be excessive or constant
B. During day, Expect to put up with normal sounds of life, washing machine, radio, builders, voices, occasional dog, at reasonable volume.
C. If you have your tv on at ordinary volume, you should not be able to hear music etc from next door. If you can hear theirs over yours it's too loud.

Popped round to say thank you this morning. Went straight to the kitchen door so they could see me rather than have to hear me. thanked them for their consideration. Seemed like the right thing to do.

You sound like a lovely, gentle and considerate person, OP. You definitely would have been within your rights to point out the problem of their TV volume.
My daughter is studying "studying'' for her Highers at the moment (Scotland) and I can't imagine her being expected to do her revision through all that noise.
I think some people underestimate the stress that these (prolonged) situations can cause.

ear plugs. she/he won't hear a thing.

That sounds very annoying, why don't they get hearing aids though?

Headphones or ear plugs - good luck!

Good outcome.

Good luck to DD.

If he won’t wear head phones when his wife is out he is not likely to turn the music down. I agree with previous posters re noise cancelling head phones. Plus it might be hard(for them with hearing aids) to use head phones and most old peo0le (huge genralisation) find in ear head phones hard to use.

Noise cancelling headphones only work if you are listening to something (music etc) through them.
They don't magically remove all the external noise and leave you with a silent environment to study in.

I agree with Pinga. Maybe ask the lady and she can pass on the messsge to her grumpy husband.

Wow there are some really mean posters on here!

Good luck to your daughter for her exams.