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AIBU?

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Original poster

Was I unreasonable? New neighbours!

78 replies

Sherlock28 · 08/05/2018 21:05

A little long as I want to include some background.

We've recently had a new family move in next door. Mr X (the DH) has a car business so the first week they moved in there were 4 extra cars in our narrow little cul de sac, all parked legally, 2 on our shared driveway and 2 more or less outside his house. We have 2 spaces for us on our drive so no issue with us not being able to find parking, just a little extra manoeuvring needed as one of his cars was parked across his drive so blocking ours by a few inches. This bothered DH a little but I told him to leave it as they were new neighbours and I didn't want any issues. We could just park right up against the wall to allow space for us to get in on the driver side.

When bin day arrives they constantly put bags in our bin and leave bags all around the side. DH went out once to put a bag in our bin and there was obviously no space! There's only 2 of us and 6 of them so I again I told DH not to bother saying anything, if our bin is half empty their bags going in isn't an issue and they would obviously have more rubbish than us as there is more of them. They obviously hadn't realised we had more bin bags that time as our bin had been taken out and put in front of the house.

Today DH comes home from work and there is vomit on our empty side of the drive and on theirs next to the driver side of their car. He knocked on next door and asked if everything was ok. The wife answered and asked why he was asking this, he said there is vomit on the drive. She said let me go in and check with my husband and closed the door on him. DH waited a few minutes and realised she wasn't going to come out again. He then parked elsewhere. I arrived home and the wife was washing vomit off the drive. I was unaware as to what had happened and as soon as I opened the car door she walked over and told me DH was unreasonable for knocking on and he should have just cleaned it himself. I asked if it was my DH's vomit and she said no it was her DH's but he was come across with nausea, puked, walked in his own house, and didn't tell anyone. She said it had just happened so her DH didn't have chance to tell anyone. I enquired about her DH, hope he got well soon and just walked in to my house. Myself and DH checked our security camera and Mr X had vomited at 2.25pm, myself and DH both arrived home between 5 and 5.30pm so it was there for hours! I said hello to Mrs X just now as I was taking my bin out and she said 'I thought you were nice neighbours but I was obviously wrong' and just walked in to her house.

I'm so confused, did DH or I do something wrong here?

OP posts:

Flutist · 08/05/2018 21:45

Mr X (the DH) has a car business so the first week they moved in there were 4 extra cars in our narrow little cul de sac
Is this still happening? If so report to the council, he is not permitted to run a car sales business from a residential address.

SusieOwl4 · 08/05/2018 21:46

Oh dear . Don’t let them take advantage. Secure your bins . I feel you have bad neighbours .

Duck90 · 08/05/2018 21:48

I agree with birdonawire

IMO Moving house would be preferable to neighbour wars.

Honeyroar · 08/05/2018 21:50

You should have replied "we are nice neighbours. We never vomit on our neighbour's paths and grumble about clearing it up..."

BewareOfDragons · 08/05/2018 21:51

She didn't think you were 'nice' neighbours; she thought you were total pushovers who weren't going to complain that they were blocking your drive or filling your bin.

Take their rubbish out and put it on their doorstep each and every time they put it in.

And make them move their cars.

Absolute pisstakers, thinking you should clean up their vomit on your property,too. Fuck that!

gillybombilly · 08/05/2018 21:54

Not unreasonable at all, OP - this sense of entitlement infuriates me. Surely the decent thing for a new neighbour to do would be to discuss the parking situation, and politely ask if they can put the odd rubbish bag in your bin from time to time.
As for the vomit - they should be ashamed.
You've given them an inch, and they've taken a mile, and had the nerve to try and make you out to be the bad guys, so you need to fight back and let them know that enough is enough.

Dobby1sAFreeElf · 08/05/2018 21:56

Yeah, they're nutters. Your DH enquired whether they were ok, and they think you're arseholes. And they're liars to boot.
Did Mr X seem sober on the CCTV?

Daddystepdaddy · 08/05/2018 21:56

Councils will often provide more bins for houses with higher levels of occupancy - this is their problem not yours. I'd be quite happy to let my neighbours use my bin if they ask but just being CF and putting it in is not on.

Also, as others have said, running a business like that from your home is illegal.

Nip it in the bud now or regret it later.

CocoaGin · 08/05/2018 22:02

Honest answer, I'd put my house on the market.

Life's too short.

If they've bought, you're stuck with them. If they're renting, they could be replaced with even worse. Either way, you're screwed.

mantlepiece · 08/05/2018 22:04

Move, your life will be hell with neighbours like that.

FASH84 · 08/05/2018 22:04

Shared drives are the thing of nightmares. Sorry OP

LipstickHandbagCoffee · 08/05/2018 22:06

What’s a gravity lock for bin?

eggsandwich · 08/05/2018 22:06

Get a lock for your bin that sorts that issue out, have as little to do with them as possible.

ArcheryAnnie · 08/05/2018 22:07

I think you've got very necessary conflict coming your way, OP, as they are indeed cheeky fuckers. Don't let them take an inch.

Tara336 · 08/05/2018 22:07

They thought you were nice because they were getting away with murder! She probably embarrassed about the vomit on the drive and isn’t sure what to say so being defensive. Keep being polite but firm when they do asshole things

FASH84 · 08/05/2018 22:08

I just googled gravity lock, well that's something I didn't know existed! Brilliant idea

Aprilmightbemynewname · 08/05/2018 22:08

Speak to the Council tomorrow and check they have a legitimate business.

Gacapa · 08/05/2018 22:09

Ugh. Leaving sick all over your drive is disgusting. If he was very unwell and couldn't clean it up then they could have at least apologised when your DH raised it with her.

I'd have been mortified and very apologetic. What's wrong with people?

doughnutbits · 08/05/2018 22:11

Yes, contact Council.

AmericanEskimoDoge · 08/05/2018 22:12

Ugh, they sound awful. Sorry you're having to deal with them!

monkeychickenpig · 08/05/2018 22:14

Are they being housed by the council?

Complain

Time to make sure you leave your bin in back garden and wheel out on bin day

Park over top of your drive so they can't

And knock on their door to let them know you have cctv

Bullies

LittlePaintBox · 08/05/2018 22:16

Report the possible business and get the bin lock. I'd be tempted to make something that looked like vomit to leave all over their path as well. They sound awful - some people are completely inconsiderate of their neighbours.

Original poster

Sherlock28 · 08/05/2018 22:16

The extra 'business' cars Mr X had for the first few weeks have now all gone. He does come home in different cars but as long as they are on his own drive, that's fine by me. He always seems to have 3 cars at any one time (2 on drive and one outside the house), which in a tight cul de sac you notice any extra cars straightaway but that's fine by me. We have 2 cars and obviously have our own visitors but as long as no one blocks anyone else in, we're cool with that.

I'm glad it's not me and DH that were deemed to be unreasonable in this. We have been looking to move recently, only because both our jobs now result in us commuting separately to the same town every day so financially makes sense for us both to move to that town but I wanted to do it at my own pace, rather than being 'railroaded' in a sense in to moving out!

We were very lucky with our previous neighbour, a single Mum with one car, polite, friendly, always took our bin out for us, we took hers in etc. We did take the new neighbours bins out for them the first new times but they never thought to take ours in so DH stopped that straightaway!

There's a difference between keeping yourself to yourself (which me and DH tend to do) and then just being unfriendly and rude which nee neighbours have turned out to be! We're the youngest couple on the Estate, the only ones without kids, so have always accommodated other neighbours putting stuff in our bins but they always knocked on and asked beforehand not just dumping their rubbish in ours and leaving it trailing around the side too!

OP posts:

NotARegularPenguin · 08/05/2018 22:17

I guess having a dump on their drive under cover of darkness and leaving it there would be childish?

Coolaschmoola · 08/05/2018 22:17

"We ARE nice neighbours... We didnt complain when you repeatedly used our bin without asking, we didn't complain when you parked over our drive... If YOU were nice neighbours you wouldn't do either of those things - nor would you leave disgusting puke on our property. Google pit and kettle."

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