This Morning - Kids having ears pierced is child abuse ?

[daffodillament]

What utter nonsense. Just tuned in as heard them mention this subject stemmed from Mumsnet ! Now the woman is saying Kids ear piercing is basicly the same as FGM !! I mean WTF ? Get a grip. No it not !

[MyRelationshipIsWeird]

Making holes in their body before they are old enough to want it or understand that it is permanent is abuse. I think it’s awful. I know in some cultures it is routinely done, that doesn’t make it right, whether ear piercing, circumcision, fgm or any other permanent body mod done for non-medical reasons.

My DD had to wait until she was 10 as did most of her friends, at that age they understand that it’s permanent, can clean and care for their piercing themselves and are old enough to consent to the pain of having it done.

[MyRelationshipIsWeird]

I wonder how many of those who think it’s ok to pierce a baby’s ears would pierce her nose or eyebrow. Surely if making a permanent hole in their baby is acceptable it should also be ok to make one or two elsewhere, baby with belly button piercing perhaps?

[movinonup]

I do think it is abusive but in no way comparable to FGM.

[ICantCopeAnymore]

Yes, or just stab their baby with a needle for no reason.

[BillowingFluffs]

Agree with FaFoutis that it's not comparable with FGM but it is on the abuse spectrum. I don't understand how anyone can not see anything wrong with the idea of piercing a baby's skin with a sharp implement. If I stuck a needle through my baby's cheek or eyebrow and inserted a stud then everyone would be outraged, yet to do the same to an ear is considered fine.

[Zaphodsotherhead]

Not the same as FGM, if you leave the holes in ears they grow over.

[IWannaSeeHowItEnds]

I know claires gets a lot of flak on here but one thing they do well is piercing both ears simultaneously, which makes the process as quick as possible. They massively take the piss with their pricing and aftercare products imo though.
Back in the 70's, when I had mine done, my mum just cleaned my ears with warm salty water and turned the sleepers so they didn't go gunky. I think putting studs in newly pierced ears doesn't help with keeping them clean.

[WalkingOnAFlashlightBeam]

Of course it's abuse. It may be culturally normalised, that doesn't change that it's abuse.

There are cultures where FGM is normalised and seen as a good thing. That doesn't stop it being abuse.

Obviously the effects and procedure of FGM are more serious for a child, completely agree. But physically harming a child and causing them pain for something unnecessary because adults in the culture want to is abuse, whichever way you try and slice it.

[Anxiousally]

I'm just watching the debate on plus one now. The lady campaigning against pierced ears is totally reducing the seriousness of FGM by putting them as the same type of abuse. Whilst I won't be rushing out to have my little girls ears pierced, her argument is disgraceful!!!

[daffodillament]

Exactly Anxious ! I felt the same.

[BlueBalletDress]

Or course it's comparable to FGM, it's just the lesser end of the spectrum.

FGM- Female genital mutilation (FGM) is a procedure where the female genitals are deliberately cut, injured or changed, but where there's no medical reason for this to be done.

Ear piercing- deliberately and permanently making holes in a child's ears, for vanity.

How can you not see the comparison? Just because it's not as bad, doesn't mean it's not from the same line of thinking. That it's ok to alter a child's body in the name of 'culture'.

[ATownCalledGallus]

Very good point, whoever made it, about piercing your dog's ears.

Would you? No, it seems ridiculous and cruel, no?

Why is it not ok to pierce a dog's ears but fine for a 2yo??

[WalkingOnAFlashlightBeam]

Well explained, Blue. People frothing because they can't see the comparison is bizarre, nobody is claiming that both cause the same long term damage or are equally painful to have done.

[mustbemad17]

Had mine done as a tiny baby (now 30). I haven't worn earrings in years but i can still get them in. Sometimes they don't close up.

I disagree that it is anywhere near as extreme as FGM but i do agree with the idea of it being abuse. There is no benefit to the child having them done, so you are inflicting pain on them for your own selfish reasons. Once a child is old enough to make that choice - and understand the process - then fine.

My mum regrets having mine done so young. I don't have a problem with it, there are videos of me walking around at 3 showing everyone my 'pretty ears' so it didn't terrorise me...but it isn't something i would inflict on my DD

[mrsm43s]

The right age for a child to get their ears pierced is when they are old enough to understand what will happen (i.e it will hurt a little), when they are old enough to take care of the earrings (hygiene plus also beyond the rough and tumble age) and most importantly when THEY want to.

On the whole I would say that would be around 8+, but of course will depend on the individual child.

I don't like to see babies/toddlers with pierced ears. Equally, however, there's a few of my DDs friends who are early teens who want their ears pierced, but their parents won't allow them to, and I equally find that weird and controlling. Once they are at the age where they are capable of looking after them, then surely it's up to the individual what they do with their own body.

My DD had her ears done the summer before starting secondary. She'd been asking from earlier in yr 6, but we explained that as she needed to keep the earrings in for 6 weeks she needed them done over the summer, which she understood. It also gave her plenty of time to be sure it was what she really wanted.

[CatchIt]

Whilst it's not comparable to FGM, it is still mutilation and mutilation is abuse.

I still don't know why (non-medical) circumcision in boys isn't considered abuse either for that matter, but that's a whole other topic.

[DiplomaticDecorum]

Can I throw circumcision into the debate? Not really comparable to the horror of FGM, but mostly done for vanity and without consent. (excluding genuine medical cases)

[Helmetbymidnight]

Comparing to fgm is ridiculous, I also don’t think it’s abusive.
If you could stick a needle in your kids ear v quickly and they would be super clever, kind sporty or something then many of us would queue up to do it- it’s just, afaik, the only reason people do it, is to make their baby daughter more decorative and for me, that’s bit of a weird thing to want or to prioritise.

[mustbemad17]

I disagree with circumcision too aside from medical issues. It's barbaric afaic

[Anxiousally]

It's awful.
FGM has life long I'll effects on the victims, the infections it causes can and has lead to the death of the child. I don't agree with the piercing of a child's ears but I am utterly shocked that it could be likened to something like FGM.
you can take out a pair of ear rings and the holes will close up, you will never EVER be able to fully rectify the damage done both physically and mentally when FGM takes place.

It's like the grandmother who is about to perform FGM saying "it's fine, just like having your ears pierced"

No. Just no.

[IWannaSeeHowItEnds]

I really can't see the comparison Blue. FGM is cutting parts of a childs body away. It causes permanent pain and removes a womans ability to enjoy sex.
It is not at all comparable to making two tiny holes for earrings. Now I agree that it shouldn't be done to babies, who are unable to understand or consent. But even in that scenario, to equate it to fgm is revolting.

[daffodillament]

Yes Helmut .

[vampirethriller]

Mine were done when I was 3 and I can't remember it hurting but I'm sure it did. I was in Claire's the other day and they were piercing a group of babies less than a year old. Horrible to watch and hear.

[BlueBalletDress]

To me you're either for permanently altering a child's body for non medical reasons or you're not, it's that simple.

[stickygotstuck]

Not comparable at all to FGM.

• Many adults decide to have their ears pierced because they like it.
  
• Adult women don't decide to have FGM performed on them (as far as I know).