To hate being born between social classes?

[gorseclay]

Name changed for this one.

Is it U to dislike being born to parents of differing social classes?

My father is v traditional upper middle class whereas my mum is very working class. Don’t get me wrong, I love being able to have two perspectives on everything and seeing two sides to every history.

I just feel I lack a sense of “belonging” to one specific group of people. I love the friendliness and close knitness of working class people in my area but feel I don’t “fit”. Maybe this is my fault and all in my head, but they tend to view me ad a bit “posh”. Whereas the other group the other.

I constantly feel as if I’m picking sides!

Is this all you have to worry about

Frightful yes I think adding foreign to the mix magnifies the feeling. My grandparents had a similar difference in class to yours, with one set french. You'd now have me down as solidly english upper middle class on meeting me, but my attitudes and expectations are quite different to those of friends who have two sets of solidly middle class english professional parents.

it may come down to why do some people feel they fit in both generally in life and with the people they mix with and why not. That may not relate to class diffrerences but to things like did they have to move around a lot as a child so felt unsettled, did a parent leave which upset them, did they have to face too much change rather than the solidity or dullness of being a person from a place rather than a person who moves between places.

Do you have and indeed did your parents give you through your upbringing that sense that you are okay as a person, not worse than anyone else. I suspect that feeling can be given to children within any class. I rarely feel worse than anyone else or having to be concerned about how to behave. Some other people worry all the itme about it. I am not so sure it really relates to class. I might well be doing things posher people might think was dreadful but I either don't know or don't care.

Hm, it's a tricky one. I don't know what class I am - I was raised on a council estate by a single mum on benefits; I'm now a teacher with a masters degree, married to a chartered accountant and we bought our first home 2 years ago when we were 28. Not sure what that makes me and honestly I'd never thought about it until I read this thread.

I kind of get what you mean. My parents very much had a working class upbringing, my dad especially. But then I'd say now they're middle class and we had a middle class upbringing. Dad worked his way through uni and has a successful career now, 4 bedroom semi in the leafy suburbs. Mum was able to be SAHM. All us kids went to uni and have gone onto have successfull careers.

My DH definitely came from a working class family. He left school with no qualifications and worked his way up. Where we live now is a very working class area and I feel like I don't fit in. Most of the other women here are younger SAHMs. I'm quite a shy reserved person anyway so I put a lot of not fitting into that, but my OH seems to fit in more than me. I just don't feel like I have much in common with other people here.

I think there are a lot of people with working class parents that wanted their children to achieve more than they did. So if you worked reasonably hard at school, got to university, got your degree and a graduate job, suddenly you are middle class. That’s what happened to me.
But it happens to so many people so I feel like I’m mixing with people from a similar background as well as solidly middle class people, then throw in mixing with parents from school, some may have come from a middle class background but are in working class jobs AND there are also the people that would’ve had a more middle class upbringing if their parents had not split up and so they grew up poorer and thought they were working class.
It’s quite a mix that I don’t even think about class unless DH makes a comment about people’s values and I think he’s wrong as the working clsss people I knew all wanted to better themselves.