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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Aibu rude hairdresser

60 replies

Grossmascaragoop · 05/05/2018 12:35

I really don’t know if i wbu to say something in this situation or if it’s not worth it?

I’m currently sat in the hairdressers. Booked myself in today for the first time in forever - I’ve had two babies in less than two years and never have time so thought I’d treat myself. Due to never getting it done my hair is incredibly long and thick and I’ve been enjoying all the compliments I’m getting on it so definitely want to keep the length. Spoke to the colourist to discuss colour (she commented it’s in great condition) and she then passed me on to the hairdresser.

Here is my problem. He asked what I wanted and I said plenty off the layers and showed him a picture of how I want the front but I said please take as little off he length as possible. He gestured to how much he wanted to cut (a good 5 inched) and I laughed wondering if it was a joke and said oh no that’s a lot isn’t it? Just an inch would be the most I’m prepared to go. At that point he got so huffy with me! He said well do you know what why don’t I just not take anything off? Because there’s no point just taking an inch. It won’t look good. I said again (politely) I really wasn’t prepared to get more than an inch off the length and he just said well ok then I will just leave it she (gestured toward the cringing colourist) is looking after you now.

I’m so disappointed!! They’re sorting me out another hairdresser now (hopefully) but he made me feel like I was being told off for being naughty....I’m not assertive at the best of times so I’m glad I held my ground and said no to him taking more than an inch off.

My question is wibu to make a complaint of some sort? Or is there more than likely no point? Not sure what they can do about it or if they will. If it makes any difference it’s a well known chain. My hair is really not in bad condition it’s just not perfect and maybe a little dry at the ends. Regardless of this I didn’t actually ask for his opinion on what I should get done so I don’t think it was neccessary for him to make such a scene.

OP posts:

Chewbecca · 05/05/2018 13:10

Do you know who the owner of the salon is? I'd mention it to them, say how nice the other staff were but that this guy put you right off the salon.

SilverHairedCat · 05/05/2018 13:10

He is in the wrong, however I have a caveat to that - he probably doesn't want to cut your hair into a style which in his professional opinion isn't a good one, and which you'll complain about later that he did a bad job.

He has an attitude problem, but what if he also has a point?

user838383 · 05/05/2018 13:13

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TestingTestingWonTooFree · 05/05/2018 13:14

What a prick!

Aridane · 05/05/2018 13:15

Gosh. Still, you have a lovely colourist and hopefully a fab alternative stylist

Grilledaubergines · 05/05/2018 13:16

Thing is, not a lot can be done to layer it if you only have an inch off!

Goldmandra · 05/05/2018 13:18

I would ask the colourist's advice re complaining. The other staff there might be grateful for someone raising this guy's behaviour formally.

MyUsername200 · 05/05/2018 13:19

YANBU, he was just plain rude and I'd definitely say put in a complaint. I think when you feel uncomfortable at a hairdressing salon it's time to move to another.
I had something kind of similar once upon a time, I wanted my hair cut to a long bob but the hairdresser didn't think it'd suit me. I'd had one before so knew it did suit me and knew it was so much easier for me to maintain - I told her all this but she still disagreed with me saying I'd be making a big mistake. I ended up moving to another salon and got a fantastic long bob. At the end of the day it's your hair and your decision on how you'd like it.

Soundsgood · 05/05/2018 13:19

Maybe he thought it would look like a mullet with little of the length but loads off the layers?

YANBU though, you should get what you ask for.

IronMansIronButt · 05/05/2018 13:20

Not really getting all the "you've come for a hair cut he should shut up and cut it" answers when his whole problem was that OP doesn't actually want it cut. An inch off "incredibly long hair" is literally nothing.
You were wasting his time a bit.
He could have been politer about it though.

ADishBestEatenCold · 05/05/2018 13:24

"Colourist has just offered a treatment free of charge to apologise"

Everything should be free of charge. Everything!

And even then ... I don't think you should stay. Where is the feelgood factor in your "first time in forever" treat now.

Original poster

Grossmascaragoop · 05/05/2018 13:24

To those saying maybe he had a point - perhaps. But I don’t care how right he is he shouldn’t speak to anyone like that. He could have refused to do it in a much kinder way if he was really worried about his professionalism.

Oh and by the way almost done and it’s looking glorious so I guess maybe he wasn’t that right

OP posts:

InsomniacAnonymous · 05/05/2018 13:25

"An inch off "incredibly long hair" is literally nothing."

No it isn't. It's literally an inch.

IronMansIronButt · 05/05/2018 13:25

Which relatively speaking is nothing.

Original poster

Grossmascaragoop · 05/05/2018 13:26

Iron man how would I be wasting his time when I’m paying the same as I would have been if he’d taken off how much he wanted to?

OP posts:

jaseyraex · 05/05/2018 13:27

I have very long hair, down to my bum, and I always ask how much they think needs taking off because I know I don't get it cut as often as I should. It's always more than I would like taken off but I trust my hairdressers judgement. I don't want just a little bit cut and still be left with dead ends.

However, if the hairdresser thinks more should be taken off than you'd like, it should always be discussed professionally and they should explain why taking off more would be better. I would not expect my hairdresser to throw a strop! Make sure and leave a lovely review for colourist and a complaint for the original hairdresser.

BewareOfDragons · 05/05/2018 13:28

He was rude.

But.

You said your hair is incredibly long and thick. And hasn't been cut for over two years, through a couple of pregnancies.

TBH, like others have said, your hair probably needs a good, solid trim: the ends are probably well split and will need to be evened up. And now that you're through your pregnancies, I suspect it will start thinning out a bit, too, as the pregnancy and post-pregnancy hormones settle down.

I will also say, if your hair is truly 'incredibly' long, as in all the way down your back and then some, and you don't want to cut it because you're enjoying all the complements, while I get that, I would have the 5 inches if not more taken off. I had an acquaintance years ago who had super long hair like that. She loved people commenting on it due to it's length. But in reality, it was scraggly looking around the bottom 10 inches or so, and not very nice to look at. But she refused to cut it as she said it was the 'most interesting thing about her'. And she meant it. And, frankly, it was sadly true. If that is the case with you, please cut your hair and get out there and make friends, find hobbies, learn things. Your hair should not be the most interesting thing about anyone. That's just sad.

Original poster

Grossmascaragoop · 05/05/2018 13:29

That’s a bit mean dragons. I think you would maybe get on with this hairdresser...

OP posts:

JessicaJonesJacket · 05/05/2018 13:30

I think it depends why you go to a hairdresser's. Obviously you went to feel pampered and with a very clear idea of what you wanted. Lots of people (especially when they haven't visited a hairdresser's for a while) actually go to get advice on the best cut for their hair, face shape, etc.
Yes he shouldn't have huffed off but it sounds as though you laughed at his professional opinion. That wasn't ideal on your part.
He's also perfectly entitled to refuse to do a cut that he thinks isn't working, for a customer who laughed at his suggestions. He has a professional reputation.

ADishBestEatenCold · 05/05/2018 13:32

"You were wasting his time a bit."

Really?

I would say he has wasted OP's time (in addition to being a rude, unprofessional, diva). She is the paying customer. Not a customer who said "you're the artiste, what do you think I should have done", but a customer who knew exactly what her requirements were and explained them clearly. In what way did that waste his time, IronMan?

LavenderDoll · 05/05/2018 13:32

If it hasn't been cut for 2 plus years it will need more than an inch taking off.
He could have worded it better but sometimes it's worth taking on board a professional opinion

IronMansIronButt · 05/05/2018 13:32

you were wasting his time as he told you what you needed and you instead asked for an insignificant amount off, that would involve him faffing at it for a while and your hair looking exactly the same when it was finished!

Original poster

Grossmascaragoop · 05/05/2018 13:35

It does seem like a few people think everyone should be going to hairdressers for advice on how they should have their hair rather than to get their hair cut how they would like it. I prefer the latter which is my choice.

Iron man that is ridiculous.

Anyway just had a completely unprompted apology from the manager. Haven’t even complained so they seem to agree with me. Thanks for the replies everyone

OP posts:

InsomniacAnonymous · 05/05/2018 13:36

JessicaJonesJacket The OP clearly said that she laughed because she thought he was joking.

BewareOfDragons · 05/05/2018 13:36

I wasn't trying to be mean about my acquaintance. Genuinely not. But growing long hair isn't really an accomplishment (under healthy circumstances), and this poor girl genuinely thought her hair was all she had going for her in life at the time.

As for the OP, If your hair is healthy and in good condition, by all means grow it as long as you want. Don't cut any off. Yes, the hairdresser was rude. But maybe he was trying to make it look healthier and fall better due to a lot of split and uneven ends...that's his job.

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