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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

....to consider living in my car for a bit?

133 replies

RebeccaBunchLawyer · 05/05/2018 10:06

Hello,

I’m in not the best situation, living-wise, and to cut a long story short, am considering living in my car for a few weeks, hopefully I will sort something out after a bit.

I will be opening out the seats and sleeping (or trying to!), in residential areas. I will be travelling light, only bedding, toiletries, paperwork put in storage etc. Blackout blinds on windows, showers and phone recharge at work.

The things that worry me most are obviously safety: someone trying to hurt me or steal the car/from the car whilst I’m in it, someone bumping/banging into car whilst I’m in it etc. Also, privacy, people possibly knowing I’m there etc etc.

Re ventilation, I will have all windows open the tiniest crack.

Basically I need to know whether or not this is feasible. I don’t really have any other options, so I just want to know if there’s anything else I need to consider.

Please, if there’s anything I really need to know/consider, let me know. If it’s illegal in any way, if there are any other potential dangers etc.

Thanks.

OP posts:
UnexpectedItemInShaggingArea · 05/05/2018 10:19

I would only do this as a very very very last resort. Could you not even sofa surf? If anyone I knew was contemplating this, even if I only knew them well enough to trust them in my house, I'd take them in.

Other than that you have identified all the dangers.

If it does come to this then don't park overnight in the same street for days on end, residents will get nosy.

Do you even have someone's drive to park on rather than the street?

Original poster
RebeccaBunchLawyer · 05/05/2018 10:25

Thanks, Unexpected, no, can’t sofa surf as don’t have many friends, my best friend rents a room anyway, and I don’t feel they owe me anything.. Yes, I wouldn’t park in same road as not fair on people living there.

OP posts:
ashbah1980 · 05/05/2018 10:28

Have you ever tried to sleep in a car OP? Try it for a night and im sure you will re consider

disconnecteddrifter · 05/05/2018 10:28

I have done it for a week before but not in same circumstances i.e. I still had a place to store my stuff and I had friends I could park on their drive and use their water etc. I also have parked in national trust car park with toilets. But I wouldn't park anywhere isolated. Can yiy park on your friends drive?

MissCherryCakeyBun · 05/05/2018 10:29

I would second the trying to sleep in a car also where will you wash before work and go to the toilet? Also the cost of food eating out for every meal. Contact Shelter

ashbah1980 · 05/05/2018 10:30

Disconnected- did your friends not even offer you a floor to sleep on? Shock

Queenoftheblitz · 05/05/2018 10:30

If things are that desperate is there any way you can find a discreet spot at work, under a desk etc?

UnexpectedItemInShaggingArea · 05/05/2018 10:31

Where abouts in the country are you? Could you even afford a campsite? You could probably find a very cheap tent on gumtree.

Wildlingofthewest · 05/05/2018 10:31

One night sleeping in a car will be more than enough. Where are you going to use the toilet? For example, if you need to go during the middle of the night?
Contact Shelter to discuss your options, sleeping in your car is not a reasonable option for any length of time.

JaiPo · 05/05/2018 10:31

I don't know. IF it's just you, and you move the car every night, and it means you don't go in to debt for the sake of ''comfort'' then I would consider it too.

I'm ok now but I have wondered how I could ever get out of the situation I was in, in the past, and if savings a month's rent, or avoiding the expenditure of a b&b for a month helped me in the LONG TERM then I would consider it in summer. I wouldn't consider it homeless. So long as you have a bank account and an income of some description then it could be a canny measure.

Phimosa · 05/05/2018 10:34

I did it for a week in Australia, but it was proper out in the bush and there was no other accommodation.

Your back will hurt.

DontDribbleOnTheCarpet · 05/05/2018 10:35

I agree that a campsite would be a better idea if possible. You'd at least have access to a toilet, washing facilities and probably laundry facilities. I can't imagine work would be pleased with you turning up in unwashed clothes even for a short time.

esk1mo · 05/05/2018 10:38

there is a sofa surfing website. my brother used it when travelling and i think its pretty cheap if money is tight. otherwise maybe look at hostels? some can be even £8 or £10 per night

Original poster
RebeccaBunchLawyer · 05/05/2018 10:38

Thanks, it is not ideal and I am not bringing out the violins- sorry if it sounds this way- just looking how to do it safely.

No driveways to park on, would get a camping toilet, and no, can’t sleep at work. I work as a carer/companion at the moment- day visits, and was actually caught parking on a client’s driveway a few days’ ago. I basically arrived an hour early and parked around the corner (big driveway) by the client, and had to say I was going for a walk before work!

And thanks, JaiPo, I think I can do it for a while. It’s warm now, and surely better than being on the streets and paying £850 pcm to rent a one bedroom flat

OP posts:
Furano · 05/05/2018 10:40

If it’s just for a few weeks can you stay in a campsite in a cheap tent?

Original poster
RebeccaBunchLawyer · 05/05/2018 10:41

And thanks for tent ideas, but would feel safer in the car, I think!

OP posts:
thegreatbeyond · 05/05/2018 10:42

OP, would it be all right to explain a little about how you came to be in this situation? It would help in terms of advice.

RomeoBunny · 05/05/2018 10:43

OP why dont you rent a room in a house share? Depending where you live this could be as cheap as £200 a month all inc. Some even cheaper for lodgers.

Undercoverbanana · 05/05/2018 10:45

I did it for a week once. My life was a mess and I couldn’t see an alternative. It was January - not good.

Keep moving on. Don’t stay in the same place. Don’t tell too many people you are doing it - only those who may be able to support you and help you to move on. Whatever you do, don’t tell your employer or anyone with links to the police. It’s not illegal, but you are an easy target for them to label as “known to us”.

GabsAlot · 05/05/2018 10:45

cant u just rent a room it wont be as much as that

surely u can look further if its too expensive as you have a car

SD1978 · 05/05/2018 10:46

A camp toilet is fine in theory- but where are you going to store it after use? It will stink in the car, and that’s if you can even use it in a car. Where will you be going after a few weeks? If this to save money? You say you can shower at work, but work at peoples homes- is there an office? I really don’t think this sounds like the most practical of ideas, but ultimately your choice. Be aware you can be moved on if neighbours object, and even charged. Would have any charges affect your job if it’s a carer? Also something to think about.

Thespringsthething · 05/05/2018 10:46

If you are a carer, could you look for a live-in position (think the Lady) or housesitting?

I get that a tent is very insecure and if there are other people sleeping rough it could be very scary.

I would also approach the homeless services in the areas you are in and see if there are any mixed or women's hostels you could stay in.

I don't think the choice is one bed flat for £850 or sleeping in the car, I think there's probably a range in the middle, such as renting a room (e.g. like a lodger), renting in a shared house, using hostel facilities and, perhaps for a day or two, the car. I know someone who did it for a few days once but it was quite unpleasant.

Mummyoflittledragon · 05/05/2018 10:47

I also think you’d be better off camping and spending the money you were intending on spending on the black out blinds on a tent and camping stove etc. It would also be safer. The summer is coming so you could do that for a while. So sorry you’re finding life so tough.

Giggorata · 05/05/2018 10:48

As a stealth van camper, I found it works well parking one night only in a suburban residential road, preferably alongside a hedge, rather than outside someone's garden gate.
Sometimes, it's better to pop out to the nearest motorway services, as you can park all night and people expect it, and don't bother. If it’s an all nighter, it's good for loos etc, too.
The biggest issue I found when sleeping in sub/urban areas was the problem of having a pee in the middle of the night.
Doubly difficult in a car, as you won't find it easy to use a potty...
In a car, it is really difficult to dress and undress in the limited space, and for the safety of a potential quick getaway, you might need to sleep in your clothes and wash and change at work the next day.
I don't know about the legality of it all....

LuluMarie · 05/05/2018 10:49

Where are you in the world?

There is a website called couch surfing, people from all over offer their sofa or spare bed to travellers passing through for free. It's always new people they haven't met before, so you don't need to know anyone.

I've had friends use it all over the world whilst backpacking or travelling, or welcoming guests, and they've had wonderful experiences with all the people they've met. Maybe take a look at this?