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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

....to consider living in my car for a bit?

133 replies

RebeccaBunchLawyer · 05/05/2018 10:06

Hello,

I’m in not the best situation, living-wise, and to cut a long story short, am considering living in my car for a few weeks, hopefully I will sort something out after a bit.

I will be opening out the seats and sleeping (or trying to!), in residential areas. I will be travelling light, only bedding, toiletries, paperwork put in storage etc. Blackout blinds on windows, showers and phone recharge at work.

The things that worry me most are obviously safety: someone trying to hurt me or steal the car/from the car whilst I’m in it, someone bumping/banging into car whilst I’m in it etc. Also, privacy, people possibly knowing I’m there etc etc.

Re ventilation, I will have all windows open the tiniest crack.

Basically I need to know whether or not this is feasible. I don’t really have any other options, so I just want to know if there’s anything else I need to consider.

Please, if there’s anything I really need to know/consider, let me know. If it’s illegal in any way, if there are any other potential dangers etc.

Thanks.

OP posts:

Agustarella · 05/05/2018 16:09

@WalkingOnAFlashlightBeam Wow, that's an amazing bargain! Was it random luck or do you have a system?

The first time I spent the night at Victoria my parents were horrified and wanted to pay for a hotel. It was nice of them but I thought making my way from a hotel to the bus station in the early morning when it was still dark sounded worse than just staying in the damn bus station until the morning. Plus I had already paid for a hotel at the other end (Dijon) and that's quite enough extravagance for one trip. :) Obviously if I were a driver I'd take the car ferry like normal people!

Goldmonday · 05/05/2018 16:10

Also make sure you have LOTS of blankets as you can't underestimate how cold it will get even in the summer. And it's similar to a tent in that you wake up boiling hot and have to open the door straight away! I have experience sleeping in cars

Smeaton · 05/05/2018 16:16

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

travailtotravel · 05/05/2018 16:16

I also would recommend camping. It brings a degree of legitimacy to the situation and a lot more security, as well as facilities. I spent 9 months living in a tent once. I was fine y'know.

NCJaneDoeNut · 05/05/2018 16:17

Also google property guardians.

Can I just say again, in the uk the council will not leave you on the street. Call them now as the homelessness service has 365 day 24 hr coverage.

Foxysoxy10 · 05/05/2018 16:31

There are lots of videos on YouTube about this. You can get lots of info and advice on there. They especially talk about the safety aspect and how to make your life as easy as possible.

In saying that I’m not sure how many of the youtubers putting those videos up truthfully live in their car and not just doing in for vids to get views etc.

Do you know anyone with a caravan they won’t be using? A tent or caravan at a proper campsite would obviously be much safer and easier for washing, cleaning, cooking.

I imagine if you are absolutely desperate you could live anywhere if necessary but whether it would be any quality of life is a completely different matter.

Can you put roughly whereabouts you are in the world and someone may be able to help?

WalkingOnAFlashlightBeam · 05/05/2018 16:33

Agustarella I just book far in advance! A few months. I find with a few months notice, the 1am buses are extremely cheap. Never more than a fiver!

I just keep my headphones in and hood up and sadly ignore anyone who approaches me to talk as I've been caught out numerous times by someone claiming to need assistance or a favour who has actually just wanted to talk to me nonstop, get me to use my phone to look up hotels for them, hit on me, or try then sit near me on the coach when there are enough seats for everyone to have a double. The only way to avoid people like that I've found is to pretend I don't hear or understand and keep my head down. It's certainly not a nice environment.

tenredthings · 05/05/2018 16:36

Motorway services is a bad idea as I got a parking ticket sleeping in my van in one. I think it's doable, if not ideal. I have slept overnight many times in my van in towns and never encountered problems.

Agustarella · 05/05/2018 16:45

@Walking thanks, it must be the booking so early that does the trick!

I remember (from the nineties!) the whole weird thing of people wanting long conversations on the pretext that they forgot their glasses and can't see the timetables, or sitting unnecessarily close. Now I'm in my 40s and multi-childed they can't sit far enough away. :) I think I'd forgotten how vulnerable and conspicuous you can be made to feel as a lone young woman.

Bloomed · 05/05/2018 16:46

How about homesharing OP? homeshareuk.org

Fontella · 05/05/2018 16:47

I was obliged to do this once (long story) - but to be fair it was a small van and I had a proper mattress, so wasn't actually kipping on car seats.

Good place to park up is all night or early/late opening) supermarket car parks - you can use the loos and and if they've got a cafe - breakfast is sorted.

You can get a shower at most council run leisure centres for a small charge. When I did it it was about 75p - £1 and when I used to go in, in the mornings - it was almost always empty. I'd take my wash bag towels and have a lovely hot shower and hair driers etc.

Another good place to park up if you are in a rural area (as I was) are Forestry Commission Car Parks as they don't bother to lock their loos at night and they have hot running water and electric lights. I'd cook my dinner on a little camp stove and wash all the pots in the loos, sometimes have a strip wash before bed.

It was quite the adventure!

Fontella · 05/05/2018 16:48

Wash all the pots in the basins in the loos - not the actual toilets!

HonkyWonkWoman · 05/05/2018 16:54

Probably been suggested as hrft but 24 hour Tesco car park???

WorldWideWanderer · 05/05/2018 16:55

Depends....I would do this if I had to. I have also seen it done, but it was when I lived in a very rural area (and very safe). A bloke turned up one day and spent a week sleeping in his car, it was parked on a little country road under some trees. He moved on after a week. Much eaiser in the countryside when you can just go to the loo in the bushes but not so easy on an urban street...
Other than that, it's doable. Plenty of padding (old duvets?) for a mattress will stop your back from aching.

Goldmonday · 05/05/2018 17:48

Pp have already suggested it but one night a week in a cheap hotel would be a good idea, so you can have a proper nights sleep etc and it will give you something to look forward to

ronniemipperton · 05/05/2018 17:52

OP please speak to your local council if you haven’t already, if you’re saying this is your only option they have a duty to help you. Even if you’re not homeless yet.

Motoko · 05/05/2018 17:59

As a pp said, a camping toilet would be no good, as they take up quite a lot of room, and you won't have anywhere to empty it. A bucket used as a composting toilet, as mentioned would be better. Look up composting toilets on YouTube, a lot of people in tiny homes use them.

A tent on a campsite would be a better and safer option than sleeping in your car. There will be wardens on a campsite. You could book a pitch for a couple of weeks, so you wouldn't need to keep putting the tent up and taking it down every day. Book another site for the next 2 weeks, and so on.

Don't let your employer know you've become homeless. I know someone who had to temporarily sleep in their car, and when their employer found out, they were told that they would lose their job if they hadn't found somewhere to live by the end of the week. It was something to do with the emplyer's insurance, if the emplyee had no fixed address.

A little more info on why you're considering this, rough area you're looking to do this in, and what your budget is, would be helpful to give you more appropriate information.

ronniemipperton · 05/05/2018 18:01

This is worth a watch for anyone who thinks it might be a good idea.

www.ted.com/talks/becky_blanton_the_year_i_was_homeless

Motoko · 05/05/2018 18:02

The council are unlikely to help, regardless of what they're legally obliged to do.

Smeaton · 05/05/2018 18:13

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

GabsAlot · 05/05/2018 20:15

janedoe thats not correct my dsis went to the council to say she was homeless slept inher car for a week they said she had a job they had no obligation to help

stubbornstains · 05/05/2018 20:33

I've done it, and it was OK. But 2 things in my favour were that the car in question was an old-style Volvo Estate, in which all the seats folded completely flat, giving me a very big and comfortable area to sleep in. Also, it was on a traveller's site, so I had the security of like minded people around.

I have spent the odd night in cars and vans on public roads, and never managed to shake off the feelings of paranoia- ears open for the slightest sound, etc.

What I would do in your position would be to find a very cheap and friendly campsite, one that allows you to sleep in your car without the bother of having to get a tent (I honestly think a big car would be more comfortable than a small tent anyway). Round here there are various campsites run by old hippies that cost as little as £6 per night, and that would give you security and the luxury of having a toilet block and showers.

Good luck!

WetsTheVet · 05/05/2018 20:38

Are you near an airport? You could sleep across seats in the airport, people will just assume you're waiting for a flight.

averylongtimeasSpartacus · 05/05/2018 20:54

There are lots of people who live in their vans, so I would say a van would be a better idea. You are not as exposed as in a car, it is easier to "stealth camp" as no one can see in.
A proper "portal pottie" type toilet has a sealed storage tank for waste so no smell or spills as long as you use the chemicals and empty regularly. I know if one bloke who lives in his van and has a gym membership- he hides the waste container in his gym bag and empties it in the loos at the gym.

You have to use common sense- be careful using gas appliances in a van with no windows, be careful where you park up, safety is a problem for a lone female.

I know people who have bought a cheap caravan and lived in it full time , you need a friendly farmer/site. If you are near the West mids/welsh borders pm me and I will give you details of a site where you could put a caravan.

There are a number of fb groups which are helpful - try campervan and motorhome overnight stops.

eggncress · 05/05/2018 21:09

Just having blinds on your car will draw attention to the fact someone is sleeping in it.Maybe better to get the rear windows tinted ? You can do it short term if you are really discreet ... don’t tell work, use 24 hr supermarkets / cafes for toilets. Leisure centre for showers perhaps?
Is buying a small second hand camper van an option even?

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