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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To wonder how someone can not know that they are pregnant?

139 replies

Eemamc · 30/04/2018 20:45

Worcester woman gave birth without knowing she was pregnant www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-hereford-worcester-43956316

I used to wonder about this, but having had a baby last year, I don’t know how you couldn’t know? Maybe if you gave birth at 20 Weeks or near that possibly, but after that?

OP posts:

Queenoftheblitz · 30/04/2018 21:24

Happened to my friend age 18. Bump didn't show, still had periods. One night out drinking she jumped off a wall and thought she'd injured herself. She went to a&e and was told she was in labour.

Popadoodledoo · 30/04/2018 21:25

My cousin didn't know she was pregnant. Shed been travelling. Came home for Xmas, woke up a few days before with cramps and had a healthy baby girl on the toilet. Her birthday is the 23rd.

She was 24, healthy and quite slim.
She 100% swore she didn't know a thing.

I was NOT the same. With ds2 I knew I was pregnant 5 days before my missed period. My symptoms seem to get stronger and worse every pregnancy lol.

I guess every woman is different.

AngeloMysterioso · 30/04/2018 21:26

With my IBS I can go from flat-stomached to looking like I’m at least 6-7 months gone in no time. Add to that the abdominal pain and trapped wind moving up and down inside me and I could probably miss the signs.

Original poster

Eemamc · 30/04/2018 21:31

I also have IBS I would say that it is very different.
I feel sorry for these women who “miss” their pregnancies, it’s such a special time, and if nothing else I really tried to enjoy pre baby time as much as I could. I’ve never felt exhaustion like it having a newborn!

OP posts:

3boys3dogshelp · 30/04/2018 21:35

With all my planned pregnancies I felt pregnant really quickly, vomited most days for weeks and wore maternity clothes really early. I had one unplanned pregnancy in the middle - I only did a test at 8 weeks because my mum told me to . Even though I felt sick a lot and kept falling asleep I just didn’t think about pregnancy. Weird. I don’t know how far I would have got without a test if she hadn’t made me check. And I wasn’t in denial or anything - I was quite happy to be pregnant again but we weren’t trying.

concretesieve · 30/04/2018 21:36

By all accounts, late MIL(!!) was a surprise baby. She had two older siblings, so her DM had experienced pregnancy.

Metoodear · 30/04/2018 21:40

I was 17 I when I found out I was pregnant I was still a size 8 when I was 7 months and was still bleeding be it irregularly

isthistoonosy · 30/04/2018 21:41

Mine (2dc) did very little kicking I even though I was top end of healthy bmi when I got pregnant with my first almost no one in my village could tell I was pregnant at full term, and I wasn't trying to hide it.

KateWindmumof3 · 30/04/2018 21:42

Can the snip really reverse its self or had it not been successfully performed in the first place ? I can't see how it could reverse its self as a pp has suggested ?

HippyChickMama · 30/04/2018 21:44

I helped to deliver a frank breech baby. The mum, about 25ish iirc, came to A&E with ?appendicitis and I honestly believe she didn't know she was pregnant. Poor lady was so shocked when she realised what was happening.

crikeycrumbsblimey · 30/04/2018 21:45

Because I was very likely infertile and didn’t register enough hormone to ovulate.

I was on the pill, only vomited for 2 days due to sunstroke.

I hadn’t had regular, proper periods for a year.

Even when I did a pregnancy test it was negative.

Pretty easy to not know really

MrsKoala · 30/04/2018 21:46

I always think this when i think about my own pregnancies. It boggles my mind that people experience pregnancy so differently. I knew with my 3 within 5 days of conception. I had a 48 hr migraine and in the case my first i went blind in one eye for 12 weeks. The nausea and fatigue kicked in after 2 weeks and people (relative strangers) were asking me if i was pregnant before i even missed a period. by 4 weeks i couldn't do up my trousers and by 12 weeks i was showing and people were guessing about 24wks. At 16ks i was bigger than friends on their due date. It made it seem like i had been pregnant forever. I remember people saying 'it must be any day now?' in July and dd was due 20th October.

CookPassBabtridge · 30/04/2018 21:48

I can't imagine not knowing I was heavily pregnant (can see how the early stages could be missed) but there was so much discomfort involved! I think most women have obvious symptoms. But it happens, some women don't have many physical changes plus the mind is a powerful thing.
Many times I'm convinced I'm pregnant when I'm not!

JustDanceAddict · 30/04/2018 22:01

I can’t imsgine it but can see how it can happen if you’re not Ttc and for reasons above.
With dd1 I met someone when I was 32 weeks who didn’t think I looked pregnant! I was slight and fitted in a ‘normal’ top still. That changed pretty quickly.
For me main symptoms were nausea and lack of appetite both times plus the lack of periods of course...

salsamad · 30/04/2018 22:18

KateWindmumof3 - yes although vasectomies are almost 100% effective there is a very slight chance that the two ends of the vas deferens can grow back together or for a rogue sperm to find its way across the void between the two blocked or tied ends. This is very rare though but you are warned about it in the paperwork you sign when your partner has a vasectomy.

Bearfrills · 30/04/2018 22:21

Can the snip really reverse its self or had it not been successfully performed in the first place ? I can't see how it could reverse its self as a pp has suggested ?

The tubes that they snip can reconnect and heal and soerm may find their way across the void between the tubes. Vasectomy has a failure rate of just under 1% (for comparison, having your tubes tied has a failure rate of just under 2%). You have to have two clear sperm samples before it's considered to have been successful and the more modern form of the procedure has taken steps to try and combat the two most common causes of failure - they now remove a small section of the tubes so that they're too short to reconnect and they cauterise the ends so that no sperm can try and bridge the gap.

paranoidpammywhammy2 · 30/04/2018 22:23

I continued to have light bleeds for a few months at the start of the pregnancy.

I had morning sickness - that's what made me realise something was wrong and do a test.

I didn't get to wear most of my maternity clothes due to how I was carrying. I had a bump band and a trouser button extension.
Pregnancy didn't affect me much. The midwife had no concerns about the size of my belly yet I hardly showed.

I thickened a bit around the middle. I had a slight back ache towards the end. I gave birth prematurely. In the hospital I had to keep proving who I was when I was going in the SCBU and in maternity they kept asking who I was visiting for the first few days.

I don't understand why people are so obsessed with proving women are not telling the truth when they say they didn't realise they were pregnant.

It annoys me when people say 'Oh they must be lying!'

RedDwarves · 30/04/2018 22:26

One of my good family friends didn't know she was pregnant until she gave birth in her bathroom.

She was 40, overweight, hadn't ever had regular periods and continued to have sporadic period-like bleeding throughout the pregnancy, and the baby was posterior so no noticeable fetal movement.

She'd been galavanting about Europe, drinking and having a great old time. The baby was happy and healthy and she and her one time fling are now married and have a second child.

NorthEndGal · 30/04/2018 22:26

It happened here last fall, (made the paper) a woman gave birth in the grocery store bathroom, who had no idea she was pregnant.
The store and town rallied around to help them out, as they were in no way prepared

Sophisticatedsarcasm · 30/04/2018 22:28

I didn’t know i was pregnant for the first 4 months of my 1st pregnancy. Had no symptoms and still had my period, granted it was a bit lighter than usual but I though it was due to stress. I didn’t even look pregnant till about 6 months and my boy was 9lb at birth. It happens...

RomeoBunny · 30/04/2018 22:29

When the placenta is in the front it can be very hard to feel kicks or movement or even see any. Some women also carry very high up and put on fat too so it just looks like theyre very top heavy and fat. The only symptom I had when pregnant was my belly. I wasnt sick or hormonal, and my boobs didnt grow at all. No aches or pains either until the day he was born.

RomeoBunny · 30/04/2018 22:31

I also have IBS that can be so bad I go from normal to 8m pregnant after one bad meal.

NordicNobody · 30/04/2018 22:31

My friend is a doctor and didn't know until she was 4 months. She had symptoms but dismissed them as part of a separate ongoing health problem.

RBBMummy · 30/04/2018 22:35

A friend had no idea she was pregnant till she gave birth. She was averagly sized, no bump. She kept going to the doctor but they just thought she had a bug. She came out 5 pound something so not tiny but small. Just the way everything happened

GrapesAreMyJam · 30/04/2018 22:41

This reply has been deleted

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at the poster's request.

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