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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To want to speak to neighbour about evening noise levels?

99 replies

Xansaf · 30/04/2018 20:15

We are quite fortunate to live in a detached house so we are seldom bothered by neighbours’ noise during winter. However our neighbours on one side, as soon as late spring rolls around, start mowing their lawn (on a very loud petrol ride on mower) and doing a spot of topiary. This is all very nice except they usually start doing this at 8pm at night and unfortunately they are on the side of the house where the bedrooms are. They woke DD who is 14 months old last night and I remember them doing so several times last summer. AIBU to want to make them aware of this? I’ll probably get told where to go but it’s pretty annoying having my kid woken up half an hour after bed and then having to sit up with her until they’ve had their gardening fix.

OP posts:
Original poster
Xansaf · 01/05/2018 07:00

Oh and they’re retired so it’s not like they get home at 7:30z

OP posts:
my2bundles · 01/05/2018 07:06

Xansaf it's not about not being supportive. We have all been where you are with young children and early bedtimes. But as an example my children are much older now and the day dosent stop at 8pm, for them or for me.

Mobydick100 · 01/05/2018 07:07

Probably don't ask the question here if u only want people to agree with you.

AppleFlapjack · 01/05/2018 07:10

How can they possibly be mowing the lawn 3 times a week???

I can understand the frustration as I have a similar aged child but that really isn't their problem, and like PPs say one day your child(ren) will likely be making more noise and/or irritating them at times.

My next door neighbour lets her dogs out e every night and they bark for a good ten mins before she lets them back in which sometimes wakes DC, but equally during the day my children are squealing, running around screeching, playing in the garden etc. so I feel we equal eachother out.

ZeroFuchsGiven · 01/05/2018 07:10

If they mowed their lawn on a huge ride on lawnmower 3 times a week there wouldn't be a lawn! Yabu not just for your op and thinking your family is the only family on the street but also for that absolute bollocks of a drip feed.

SofiaAmes · 01/05/2018 07:12

This is ridiculous. Mowing a lawn at 8pm with a loud petrol ride-on mower is absurd. And appalled at all the people who think it's ok. I live in the middle of West Los Angeles where nothing (other than shooting endangered animals) is illegal and I wouldn't dream of making noise on a regular basis at 8pm. It's just polite and nice neighbor behavior.

I would suggest a sweet and non-confrontational conversation with your neighbor....reminding them that you have a you have a 14 mo old and appealing to their sense of thoughtfulness. Maybe even sweeten the conversation with a nice gift of chocolates.

Coolaschmoola · 01/05/2018 07:13

You posted in AIBU and asked a question. I assume you expected everyone to agree with you? Well they don't.

"Thanks for being sooooo supportive."

Hmm Seriously? You didn't ASK for support, you asked "AIBU to want to make them aware of this?" and the answer to that is no. Go speak to them. As for the above petulance - newsflash, people are allowed to disagree with you...

The truth is they are within their rights to mow at 8pm, so they don't have to stop. They may hate listening to kids play - doesn't mean they can ask you to keep them quiet.

fruitlovingmonkey · 01/05/2018 07:15

Yabvu! 8pm is not late. Don’t turn into that dickhead neighbour.

SoupDragon · 01/05/2018 07:29

Righto I’ll just carry on having my daughter woken up from 8-10 3 times a week until October then. Thanks for being sooooo supportive.

What is it with people having a strop when the majority don’t agree with them? Recently it seems to be happening more and more.

missbonita · 01/05/2018 07:31

They mow their lawn with a ride on mower 3x a week between April and October? Are you sure about that?

my2bundles · 01/05/2018 07:34

So they are retired, all the more reason for them to spend their time doing what they like to do after working all their lives.

Saucery · 01/05/2018 07:41

Grass might still be a bit damp until later in the day, with the weather we are having.

SD1978 · 01/05/2018 07:50

In fairness, before having a foot stomp- you never said initially they were retired, or that it was theee times a week. Unfortunately legally you don’t have any comeback, but if you get on well, then ask them if they could do it a bit earlier.

DailyMailClickbait · 01/05/2018 07:52

OP: IABU?
MN: Yes.
OP: Waaah, you're all horrible etc.

If you are so sure that you aren't being unreasonable then why on earth did you ask? This isn't an echo chamber where people will queue up to agree with you. You are being unreasonable. Being retired doesn't mean your neighbours have to get everything done between 9-5. Unless you live in the middle of nowhere then neighbour noise is a fact of life that you are going to have to learn to live with.

Antigonads · 01/05/2018 07:57

Pop round and ask them then come back and tell us how you got on.

whatwouldrondo · 01/05/2018 08:19

Very entitled and precious post. Around here, and it is a very naice middle class area of expensive semis, the mowers can be going from 7am (there is one going now) until 9pm, and you can add in the the builders and the occasional tree surgeons The screaming children and barking dogs don’t ever really stop. Next door have a dog flap and their dog can be out at 3am barking at the foxes who have their own soundtrack (like a child being tortured). I don’t moan because I am training a wilful puppy out of a horrible high pitched bark.

Why are you sitting up with your 14 month old every time there is neighbourhood noise? Settle them down and don’t make a fuss about it and they will probably soon learn to settle, and my DD has terrible sleep problems but neighbourhood noise was never part of the issue. Do you intend to be sitting with them for the rest of their lives whenever there is a bit of noise? (I do know a mother who was still doing that with a 20 something, thankfully he was lucky to marry someone tolerant.... )

As others have said your own children will be adding to it soon enough...

BMW6 · 01/05/2018 08:23

After 10pm would be unreasonable, mowing at 8pm not unreasonable at all.
You could ask them nicely to not do it but they would be perfectly reasonable to tell you No.
And as for your hissy fit regarding posters responses - if you were so sure you were in the right to complain about your neighbours why the fuck did you ask if YABU?

getoutofthebath · 01/05/2018 09:13

They mow their lawn three times a week?!

Idontdowindows · 01/05/2018 09:17

Mowing three times a week? Do they have any grass left?

Yes, 3x a week is very unreasonable. I would simply talk to them, explain the issue and ask if they'd mind very much doing it earlier or not as often.

There's no harm in asking and if they're retired it might be easy enough for them to find a different time.

TheDrinksAreOnMe · 01/05/2018 09:19

But 3 times a week.

OP we'd be more understanding if you explained exactly what is happening 3 times a week, because no one is buying the "mowing the lawn" reason that frequently

Bojangles33 · 01/05/2018 09:23

It's not being unsupportive, people appreciate it is annoying, but the whole world doesn't change because you have a child and work around that. We all have to rub along together and they have every right to mow their lawn and trim their topiary (which, seriously, how much noise is that making?!) of an evening.

Lethaldrizzle · 01/05/2018 09:26

Aren't most councils noise guidelines 8am to 5pm? I wouldn't feel comfortable doing anything like that after 7pm but then i am aware that there are young families around me and I'm a nice neighbour Halo

DragonsAndCakes · 01/05/2018 09:26

Try putting a fan or a white noise app on a phone/tablet in your child’s room?

Bumdishcloths · 01/05/2018 09:32

@Lethaldrizzle hahahahahahahahaha

Hahahahahahaha

Ahahahahaha

5pm

Ahhhhhhahahaha

No.

echt · 01/05/2018 09:36

Despite the OP's silly response about support, I have some sympathy. I have had retired neighbours and the timing goes out of the window. One dear lady mowed at 7.00.a.m. in the summer because that's when she got up.

The other NDNs used a leaf blower every day during the autumn.

Some of it, I think, is because they're home so much and see the imperfections, things to be improved/mown/leaf blown.

And yes, to start mowing at 8.00. p.m. is not really neighbourly. I live in a suburb ( Australia) of DIY nuts/leafblowers/lawn mowers and no-one but no-one does it at that time in the evening. In fact I've just checked, and it's forbidden by local law to do this crap after 8.00.