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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To never buy snacks/squash/sweets etc again

464 replies

Fiera · 25/04/2018 23:32

Every single time there is somthing remotely snackly in the house it just gets taken and eaten. The large double concentrate bottles of squash gone within 24 hours, any kind of sugary cerial gone the same day they come through the door.
I dont like to use the word 'steal' but tonight its the only word i can use because my daughter actually STOLE my can of coke.
We never usually buy coke or Fizzy anything, nut it was my eldest sons birthday and all the children had a can as a very rare treat. My daughter actualli hid my can up her sleeve (after having drank hers earlier in the evening) and went and drank it in her bedroom.
Even my toddler daughters 'treats' like 'GoGo' biscuits and 'Goodies' puffs just disapear before she even knows theyre there.
We have a full fruit bowl, two actually, every day and even they get emptied. They have hot meals every day so theyre not 'hungry' just greedy.
I just dont understand why they do it and im seriously considering just not buying again.
My toddler will happily drink water (theres hardly ever any squash left for her anyway)

OP posts:
Scottsy100 · 27/04/2018 12:41

The words FUN and SPONGE come to mind 🙄 the children sound deprived and that’s why they act like it whenever there is anything remotely sugary around

waterrat · 27/04/2018 12:45

This thread is astonishing. I now know why the UK has an obesity problem.

So apparently your kids should be allowed unrestricted sweets/ squash / treats / crisps all the time in order that they have a healthy relationship with food and don't get fat?

People need to wake up! We have a massive obesity crisis in this country - squash/ sweets/ crisps - they are not necessary, are very very unhealthy and shouldn't be eaten regularly. Sorry if that is inconvenient for people to accept but the results of the crap we (Im guilty too) are all eating are clear all around us.

mustbemad17 · 27/04/2018 12:58

waterrat there is a difference between them being unlimited & being seen as a part of an overall diet. Restricting them completely is more likely to produce binge eating (an unhealthy attitude) compared to a kid being allowed a bag of crisps or a bar of chocolate without it being a special occasion!

chocoblock · 27/04/2018 13:50

when I was growing up I don't remember having snacks, we got pocket money so bought sweets comics etc at the weekend, we had porridge or toast for breakfast, hot school meal at lunch time then dinner in the evening toast for supper, however we all have weight problems, probably due to the fact we ate cheaply parents not earning a lot... we would eat things like home made pies, lots of potatoes, chips, mash, cheap fatty cuts of meat everything was fried

but I think the main reason for our obesity was the huge portion sizes which I still battle to reduce even now, I would rather give my dc smaller portions and a few healthy snacks, I can understand why kids appear greedy when they see lots of treats its what kids do let them eat them then say no more until next week they will soon start to think about saving some oh and I also hate water

ballroompink · 27/04/2018 13:51

Reading this thread has made me realise that my mum would have gone absolutely apeshit if we'd eaten multipacks of crisps, packs of biscuits, drank whole bottles of squash etc. in a day or two! I definitely remember sometimes buying sweets or crisps on the way home from school as a teenager and there was a biscuit tin at home as well as stuff like crisps, cereal bars etc...but I can't imagine us just helping ourselves to unlimited food between meals. Would NOT have gone down well!

I remember one occasion when I was 17 or 18 and mt boyfriend came over. My DM had got some bits in for lunch including a sharing size bag of crisps (think Kettle Chips, Sensations, Doritos size) and the two of us polished the bag off. When he'd gone I got berated about how greedy we had been to do that Grin

TigerTown · 27/04/2018 16:32

storm4star and mustbemad - sorry my comment was poorly worded, I wasn’t implying mustbe’s child must have had SN.

I was actually referring to my earlier/first comment, and trying be the opposite of judgemental, by recognising that my advice clearly wouldn’t apply to children with SN.

mustbe - my apologies if you felt I was implying your child has SN, genuinely wasn’t my intention.

Shednik · 27/04/2018 17:09

My first thought reading this...could your dd be bulimic?

TomRavenscroft · 27/04/2018 17:25

My daughter actualli hid my can up her sleeve (after having drank hers earlier in the evening) and went and drank it in her bedroom.

That's disgraceful and I'd be having a serious chat with her.

Generally, if they're old enough, maybe get them involved in making their own snacks that can be kept in the fridge and come back to. And it sounds like they need to start learning more about the value of money and how shopping gets done and food gets bought.

margesimpson40 · 27/04/2018 17:33

Your daughter took the tin of coke because it's a rarity to get and she knows it will be months before she gets another tin of at all. Tbh I'm sickened by these types of posts. Food is good and not a great doesn't matter what it is, kids get bored and want something different. For the last month I've been eating packets of ridiculous sugary sweets, couldn't get enough of them, I'm bored now so I'm craving fresh fruit and carrot sticks and water. Stop making a big deal out of nothing or those kids will never trust you with anything again. One of them may be in trouble and really need you, but at the back of her head it will be like ' but I can't tell her remember what she was like when I stole that coke, please take a look in the mirror and think about it

Smudge100 · 27/04/2018 17:38

The issue here isn‘t the type of food and whether it‘s scceptable, it‘s the fact that your daughter stole a can of coke that was yours after having drunk her own can. The legal definition of theft is the intention to deprive someone else if what is rightfully theirs. If your children cannot share high value food items and want more than their fair share means they may not be willing to share other things as well. I‘d be inclined to ask your daughter why she took your coke. Or have you already had words?

margesimpson40 · 27/04/2018 17:39

pinguine gorging and scoffing !!!!! They are teens, they get hungry, they eat . Everyone has some sort of self control, you appear to have a lot .... Mmmm maybe too much why not share some with your kids. I'd it before they grow up and realise the world has more to worry about than eating an extra biscuit. Must go and gorge on an orange. You have seriously missed me off using such negative phrases to describe something normal !!!!

margesimpson40 · 27/04/2018 17:43

Squash is indulgent ffs I have heard it all now there seems to be an 80/20 ratio on this site 80% are warm, lovely, flawed human beings and the other 20% are to motherhood what Milli vanilli were to singing.

MumsTheWordYouKnow · 27/04/2018 17:44

I keep all our snacks in my car. My son would always raid the cupboard, including climbing up on the side to find sweet treats and snacks. I decided to just hide them all. It works. They still love sweet things, but it’s very rationed. Sweet cereal has a shocking about of sugar in, a third of the amount is sugar. Watch Fat Fight with Hugh Fernely-Whittingstall. It’s an eye opener. Give them toast with peanut butter. An extra sandwich instead. We buy special fruit as a treat.

MumsTheWordYouKnow · 27/04/2018 17:45

Also bake our own cakes and reduce the sugar.

GinnyWreckin · 27/04/2018 17:48

I’d cut out anything that has sugar in it, or anything that’s quickly converted to glucose in the body. Is your dd prediabetic. She sounds like she has poor insulin control. Have you had her blood sugars tested. Ask for a fasting and glucose tolerance test.

AND it sounds to me like your DDis addicted to sugar highs.
She’s behaving like an addict, and sugar, like other refined white powder, such as cocaine is addictive.

Leave out anything that is converted to glucose out of their diets for at least six weeks. Then reintroduce wholeran cereals and more whole vegetables.

Up their proten intake, so have meat stews with root vegetables, and for goodness sake no fruit!

Fruit is instantly converted to glucose. I’d only introduce cold weather berries, and tree fruit such as pear and apple, after six weeks.

Up their vegetable intake to seven a day, and up their fat intake to 50 grams at least.

Whole milk, cheese, butter, coconut oil are your friends when going cold turkey on sugar.

No juices
No squash
No fruit
No sugary drinks
No sweetners
They can have a few wholemeal carbs like oat bran only
No refined white products at all, no flour, no sugar.

Increase class 1 protein, eggs, fish, meat, full fat dairy, like Greek unsweetened yoghurt. They should have three helpings of protein a day. Give them adult portions of steak, don’t scrimp.

Have no carbs like lentils and white rice, couscous, breads, cakes, scones, pita, wheat based pasta, breakfast cereals for the first six weeks.
Serve their meat with heaps of steamed vegetables like broccoli, green beans cabbage spinach, salads, courgette, carrots sweet potato, and with oils, fats, nuts, olives. NO starchy veg like white rice, pasta or potatoes. Aim to fill in the corners with fats.

Increase good fats, olive oil, coconut oil, and let your kids snack on steamed veg, olives, slices of full fat cheese and berries only.

You are feeding their addictions at the moment, and making them much more likely to do badly in school, have ADD, and develop addiction behaviors. You have to think of sugar is a gateway drug.

Stealing a fix, in this case, can of coke to drink, is the typical behavior of an addict.
She’s doing something harmful without being able to stop and hiding it out of shame and fear of being found out. It’s interfering in her relationship with you and her own health and self esteem.

Cut the sugar and flour out and you’ll see
First.. a reaction to the new rules and
Second when they’ve gone cold turkey, much better heath and behavior.

Be prepared for Armageddon for the first week, but hold fast. It’s better for their heath to have no addictive white refined substances.

IveGotBillsTheyreMultiplying · 27/04/2018 17:50

Marge

Being warm and lovely is not necessary linked with the amount of junk food you let your dcs have.

It's possible to be cold and nasty and give your dcs a crap diet too.

Suzielou66 · 27/04/2018 17:51

The first question I would ask is who’s the adult here? If you have rules about snacks then there needs to be consequences for the kids who break the rules. Sweets and snacks were readily available in our house but my kids knew that they needed to ask an adult before they helped themselves. If the weekly supply of snacks ran out before the end of the week that was it. However there was always bread available for toast and fruit in a bowl if they wanted a snack. My kids knew that if they wanted snacks it wasn’t a free for all. Kids need more calories than adults if they are running around so snacking for active kids is important. Just make sure you have healthy snacks available. Sounds to me like you all need retraining. If your kids are greedy as you say then do something about it now. Discipline is what is needed here not a total ban.

Twinkie1 · 27/04/2018 17:52

By one chocolate bar and one bottle of squash/fizz per child.

When it's gone it's gone.

They can eat it in one sitting or stretch it through the week but you buy no more.

A huge bottle of double concentrate squash is an amazingly large amount of sugar to go through so quickly.

Itsnotmesothere · 27/04/2018 17:53

Relax OP. My mum used to buy us treats at the weekend and warn us. Once it's gone, it's gone. If we scoffed it fast, it wouldn't be replaced that weekend.

margesimpson40 · 27/04/2018 18:02

Why are people getting overly excited by home much squash everyone goes through

I mainly bought my son small bottles of sugarless flavoured water, he also drank loads of milk and water. I'll phone and asking how much he drank in a day and I'll make sure he had enough snacks .... Pepperami, dairy lea snack boxes and chicken fridge raiders were his favourites. He liked sweets but never ate them everyday, he prefers savoury snacks he still does, must let him look at some of the posts here, it's my birthday soon and I think I may get an extra hug and an extra few kisses on my card .... He'll be relieved that I didn't act like some bloody prison warden with the fridge.

kristophersmum2008 · 27/04/2018 18:05

sorry but snacks need to happen (my boys used dinner money to buy extra snacks) change to a cheaper alternative so it doesn't hurt finances too much.
Do u bake ? i dont but it might be a option even just fairy cakes and swissroll

caringcarer · 27/04/2018 18:08

We do not buy coke or fizzy drinks either. It is not good for children. The child I care for has weak enamel on his teeth. He is given milk and water and one cup of hot chocolate before bed made with milk. He can eat as much fruit from bowl, carrot and cucumber sticks as he likes as snacks and some nuts. Apart from that he eats toast with Nutella and a yogurt or banana for breakfast, hot school lunch and takes fruit for break time, homemade hot cooked dinner and dessert. I don't offer biscuits or chocolate except on a Saturday. If he is hungry I will make him a couple of slices of toast to keep him going if he has an activity and so eating a little later than usual.

holey · 27/04/2018 18:09

I have three teenagers and yes, they can eat through the entire contents of my weekly shop pretty quickly if left to their own devices but I don't have the problems experienced by the OP and I'm trying to work out why.

My three don't all like the same things so don't tend to grab something to stop the others having it- so that may be a factor OP. Another is the fact that mine will regulate themselves and wouldn't have all the crisps in one go, for example. I think you just need to have a big, grownup family meeting and express your concerns, with regards to both the fact that they are doing themselves no good bingeing on junk and also the fact that taking something you are not meant to is theft and won't be tolerated. They are old enough to work with you to decide what quantity of snacks is appropriate to be eaten by each of them in a day. Once they know exactly what they are allowed to take you can make it clear that not adhering to the rules will result in no snacks being purchased at all next week. Have a tick sheet where they record what they've taken from their quota if necessary. If you can get them to moderate things they can still enjoy snacks the way you intend them to without you banning them altogether, something that might cause them to develop unhealthy relationships with food so is best avoided if possible. Good luck OP Smile.

pigmcpigface · 27/04/2018 18:11

I think you need to sit your kids down and talk to them, quite seriously, about healthy eating.

I was allowed one chocolate bar a week as a child. My mother rigidly controlled my diet, to the point that I sometimes didn't have enough food - huge emphasis on being slim because slim = attractive = good parenting. I became quite obsessed with chocolate as a result, and when I got a bit older and had money, I reacted by buying as much chocolate as I could and wolfing it down. I could literally eat five Mars Bars for lunch. (I was still really thin, because not getting enough food). owever, it set up a relationship with seeing sweet food as a 'treat' which has been extremely difficult to eradicate as an adult -and when I started to be able to eat more food, I did, and I gained a lot of weight.

I think it would have been considerably better if I'd been taught to look after my body because I was worth looking after, not rigidly denied food in a puritanical kind of a way. To establish that sense in your kids will mean treating your own body in the same respectful way.

Singadream · 27/04/2018 18:11

Not rtft but I totally agree @pumpkintree. My kids (primary school age) eat loads of biscuits and more sweets than they should. We don’t have fizzy drinks except at parties but squash is unlimited. They have three meals a day - sometimes four if we have a second breakfast or a late supper after an early dinner - and lots of snacks. They are also growing and running about loads. They aren’t overweight and the dentist was happy with their teeth. I find I rarely enjoy the company of one biscuit only type parents. Their kids get ratty without snacks.

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