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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

In calling my dd Vagina a "Vagina"

217 replies

lilymolly · 13/05/2007 20:19

DD is 16 months and is noticing body parts and pointing to them and making a noise, at which I will say "arm" "leg" etc. Tonight, she touched her privates and I said "Vagina" dp was a little shocked , and before any one shouts, I KNOW its her Vulva, but dont think that word is acceptable with adults never mind children iyswim.

We where having relate counselling last year for sex issues on my behalf, in other words I dont like it, and we discussed this particular issue, and the counseller told us to call it by its name, which is what we woould do with any other body part, such as her arm ect as already mentioned.

As a rookie mum, will this come back to haunt me in later years?
In other words, when she can talk will she talk about her Vagina, will she say it in inappropriate situations.
i.e my friend dds are 7 and 10 and still call it "mary" and I am pretty sure they would not know what a vagina is, and also pretty sure their mother would be mortified if my little angel came out with it

What do other people call it? Advice please

OP posts:
LittleMouseWithCLogsOn · 13/05/2007 20:20

does htis need na unreasonablt thread?

sheis 16 months she isnt CALLIGN ti anything

FrannyandZooey · 13/05/2007 20:21

Can you tell us why you think the word vulva is unacceptable while vagina is ok? You have lost me there.

morningpaper · 13/05/2007 20:23

I think most people go with "bits"

She will only be able to say "gina" for about three years anyway - 'bits' is much easier to pronounce!

tomps · 13/05/2007 20:23

We call it a fanny which sounds nice and inoffensive to me. Similarly, we haven't told dd that neither the tooth fairy nor father christmas is real. Plenty of time for all that, no ?

morningpaper · 13/05/2007 20:24

GAH that looks like a well known person's name

GAAAH

NotanOtter · 13/05/2007 20:24

vulva sounds less harsh than vagina

my neice was taught to say it and once called it a chinese!!

stick with bits or muffy

morningpaper · 13/05/2007 20:25

(BTW The other day my four year old said "I like my bits because they are pink and pink is my favourite colour" )

lulumama · 13/05/2007 20:25

we call it a foof or fanjo here....vagina sounds a bit po faced !

don;t think you are being unreasonable, but my 22 month old cannot say mama, never mind vagina. so i wouldn;t stress about it

also, calling it a mary, a twinkle, flower , button or any other name that is used for other things , i feel gets a bit confusing...so we stick to words that cannot be used for anything else

SenoraPostrophe · 13/05/2007 20:26

same question as F&Z

I know it feels like it's twee, but I don't see anything wrong with a euphemism (like bits or mary) in this case. After all, the word vagina is itself a latin euphemism: the word is cunt.

Frascati · 13/05/2007 20:26

I think it sounds horrible when young children use words such as penis and vagina.

morningpaper · 13/05/2007 20:27

?

SenoraPostrophe · 13/05/2007 20:28

dd calls hers a "mini" (for reasons to do with dh). If it wasn't too late I'd probably go for fanjo.

theUrbanDryad · 13/05/2007 20:28

even worse if they say cunt, surely?

cunny? quim?

i believe as a child i referred to it as a "front bottom" which i think is quite genteel.

lulumama · 13/05/2007 20:28

eh? but it is a penis, and it is a vagina..same as it is an arm, leg or nose....

Flamesparrow · 13/05/2007 20:28

"I KNOW its her Vulva, but dont think that word is acceptable with adults never mind children "

Roffle @ the proper word being unasseptable

lulumama · 13/05/2007 20:29

mimsy

SenoraPostrophe · 13/05/2007 20:30

urbandryad: I know - I was just trying to make the point that vagina is a euphemism itself (and not the proper word anyway)

pointydog · 13/05/2007 20:30

vadge

Original poster
lilymolly · 13/05/2007 20:31

FZ- i nswer to your question, I know its not a resonable argument, about vulva, its just a personal thing for me which I dont like.

I know I am prob being a little too worried, as many have said she isnt talking yet! but I just thought I would ask the question to get some decent responses.
I do tend to "grow" dd if you know what I mean? As a first time mum, I am convinced what I do/say "now" will be the same in a few years time but those of you with older children can quite easliy tell me otherwise I am sure

P.S Mouse with clogs.... think its up to me where I post threads yes? please send me the rule book that you have, as I would be grateful for any guidance, as to where and when I can post threads.

OP posts:
lulumama · 13/05/2007 20:33

DS used to refer to girl bits as a vagina, as that was before he had a sister, and we were being all grown up and showing him a book about where babies come from...

now we have DD, we call it a foof or fanjo, as i don;t think she needs to call it a vagina, just yet !!

lulumama · 13/05/2007 20:33

or a vulva !

Original poster
lilymolly · 13/05/2007 20:35

Vulva 440
I like fanjo, which was a word I had never heard until I joined MN.

OP posts:
Flamesparrow · 13/05/2007 20:35

DD is still convinced she has a "little tiny willy" regardless if what I say

WelshMum23 · 13/05/2007 20:37

wen i was a child i was told my bits were my "privates" or "tuppence" lol

my dd is 22 months n can name her leg arms fingers toes belly nose eyes ears teeth n her boobies but hasnt once pointed 2 her "bits" so i aint worried yet but will prob go with "bits" or "privates"

ChocolateFace · 13/05/2007 20:37

My DS's over heard me saying fanjo, thought I'd said 'banjo', and it's stuck.