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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to wonder why everyone has cleaners these days!

648 replies

Storm4star · 20/04/2018 21:49

Ok, please don’t take offence, I say this somewhat in jest. But my goodness how many of you have cleaners?? I have been utterly ripping the pee out of a male colleague at work because he and his wife have a cleaner but I hadn’t realised how common it’s become until I joined MN!

I personally struggle to justify spending my hard earned cash on things I could do myself (also do most of my own decorating and DIY). But have I missed something? Is a cleaner now the new must have?

OP posts:
greendale17 · 21/04/2018 05:39

I don’t know anyone who has a cleaner

ImMrsBrightside · 21/04/2018 05:42

I think you are probably a bit jealous. Otherwise why should you care what people spend their money on?

My job isn't particularly stressful. I work Monday to Thursday and have one child. I chose to have a cleaner because I don't want to spend my free time cleaning. The same way some people chose to spend their money on shoes, bags or eating out. It's my money and my life and I will do what I makes me happy with it!

NickyNackyNoodleNoo · 21/04/2018 05:43

I bloody love mine, I work and on my days off want to spend it with DH and my children. It's bad enough trying to get on top of the washing.

To outsource the cleaning is the best decision I've made for ages. Most of my friends have cleaners as do my neighbours.

We're all different OPWink

PlumsGalore · 21/04/2018 06:08

I could easily afford a cleaner and I work full time, but I don't because I can clean my own house. If I had a massive house maybe, but a four bed semi and a cleaner? Nah it's pretentious and unnecessary.

bestBuddyBestPal · 21/04/2018 06:10

I don't think the OP sounds jealous, just curious.

Money fortunately isn't a worry for us or most people I know but they still spend money on things I'd never consider. Expensive skin care, for example; I'm perfectly happy with Clinique and have no idea why you'd spend more.

Bowlofbabelfish · 21/04/2018 06:17

Why would you mock them for having a cleaner? That’s really unpleasant and unprofessional

I don’t have one but I’m thinking about it. We are due our second soon, my mobility is reduced due to spd then I’ll have a tiny baby and a toddler and then I’ll be back working long hours.

It’s also providing employment - cleaners where we are are about 25 quid plus an hour so it’s a reasonable gig.

There are loads of things I don’t spend my money on - hair, nails, fancy makeup, booze, fags, going out loads. I also don’t judge people who do because we all prioritise our spending differently. Don’t get a cleaner if you don’t want one but it’s very poor show to mock a colleague for having one.

bert3400 · 21/04/2018 06:17

Oh Judgy MN uses . It's not pretentious . I work full time & I'm away nearly every weekend with my son's sporting career ...so if I didn't have a cleaner we would be living in filth. I also have a gardener ....Judge away 😁😁😁

Bloodybridget · 21/04/2018 06:17

MissP several pages back - seriously, you have a cleaner eight hours a day, five days a week? What on earth is she/he doing, washing down every wall?

CircleofWillis · 21/04/2018 06:18

I’ve had a cleaner ever since I entered professional life and could afford it. My parents both come from cultures where it is seen as expected to spread money around your community. If you earn enough you employ a cleaner and that will give someone else employment and a leg up into being self sufficient.

It also takes my cleaner 4 hours to do something that would take me all day. The same with ironing. Do the maths.

Figmentofmyimagination · 21/04/2018 06:27

I had a cleaner for many years but haven't had one for about 8 years even though I work full time. We stopped it when my DH started working from home fulltime spending a lot of time on the phone. It just wasn't working for us. Most of my friends have cleaners. In the long run, I suspect not having a cleaner loses us money because expensive things wear out faster. I'm very superficial in my cleaning and I tend to leave things that aren't 'obvious', or tell myself I'll do it 'next week' and end up with annoying problems like lime scale build up.

The other difference is that now, we have annoying surface clutter, which we never had when we had a cleaner because she wouldn't have been able to just get on with it. It would be a big effort to get the house 'cleaner-ready' nowadays.

Gennz18 · 21/04/2018 06:32

It's pretentious? 🤔😂

Pretentious means affecting to impress. Not sure how that would work, I don't think the fact we have a cleaner has ever come up in conversation with anyone, and certainly no one I know would be impressed by it

tomhazard · 21/04/2018 06:33

Because my husband and I work long hours and don't want to spend time at the weekends cleaning for hours when we could be with DC.
We used to do it every sat morning and now we do fun stuff

MardAsSnails · 21/04/2018 06:37

Partly because of long hours

Mostly because I am a very lazy person, but I also get very stresse and unsettled when things aren’t right and clean, but then I’m too lazy to do anything about it, so I sit there stressing that things aren’t done rather than do them.

pasturesgreen · 21/04/2018 06:39

I personally struggle to justify spending my hard earned cash on things I could do myself

This applies to so many things, tough.
I'm a good cook. By this reasoning, should I save my cash and not eat out because I can do it myself at home with less expense? Sometimes people do stuff just for convenience/pleasure.

Skinnyboneylittlepony · 21/04/2018 06:40

Have to admit, I don't know a soul in real life who has a cleaner, (including many women who work,) but at least a third of the women on MN claim to have one. Not sure why this is.

There can be a sense of shame at ‘not doing ones housewifely duties.’ Some people I know well never mentioned it until I happened to be dropping something off when I was there. Someone else also secretly uses an ironing service and they arrived early/late and we bumped into them at the door on the way out.

Instead of a takeaway I cook a healthy meal and with the money saved pay someone to do jobs I hate.

starlightmeteorite · 21/04/2018 06:43

I don't have a cleaner. I had one for a while when I had 2 under 2 and it was amazing. I loved going out with the dcs for an afternoon and coming home to a clean house. I ended the contract when they became unaffordable, although this was also influenced by the fact they stopped cleaning properly. I think they became a bit comfortable and stopped bothering. It annoyed me that basic things like washing floors were swapped for a quick vacuum instead.

If I'm honest I probably prefer cleaning myself as then I can do the things I consider urgent first, and if anything is missed it is on me. I sometimes resent the time it takes as DH doesn't help (another thread entirely)

polkadotpixie · 21/04/2018 06:43

I used to have one, only for an hour a week just to keep on top of things. Now my wonderful Mum helps me out every couple of weeks

I'm not rich at all, I've worked 6 days a week at 2 jobs for the last 5 years (FT Mon-Fri & a second job all day Saturday) to make enough money to survive and I'm knackered. Having a cleaner enabled me to keep those hours up

umpireStrikesBack · 21/04/2018 06:46

@Bloodybridget

I know your question wasn't addressed to me but can I answer?

We have a 7:30-5 cleaner / nanny. Our two children are at school from 8:15 - ~4 so she's mostly a cleaner.

She:

launders

irons

tidies

cleans

organises things like the gardener coming

cooks

does the dishes / putting away

organises and accepts food deliveries

runs errands (last week was taking a car for new tyres, for example)

shoes get polished ... school bags get packed ...

she's a coffee snob and likes ours so she always makes some in the morning and DH and I each have a travel mug full waiting for us when we get downstairs.

Yes, walls get washed. Windows too. Each bedroom / bathroom / reception room is deep cleaned fortnightly and the used rooms are cleaned daily.

I highly recommend it. We have a spotlessly clean and clutter-free home and it takes no effort whatsoever from us.

CrabappleBiscuit · 21/04/2018 06:46

Used to have one, really miss them. But I don’t know anyone else well who has a cleaner.

TheGrumpySquirrel · 21/04/2018 06:47

Those saying you clean your own house (a 4 bed Semi???!) on top of full time work... I don't believe you have time for ANYTHING else then (or you think full time means 35 hours next door to your house and you don't have kids?). Why martyr yourself.

I have a (large) 2 bed flat. DH and I work actual full time (both out of the house at 7-7 every day). Before we had a Cleaner we used to scramble around in the evenings simply to cook dinner and then maintain a non dangerous level of tidy. Then at the weekend we would spend pretty much the whole weekend between us getting on top of laundry, ironing and properly cleaning the kitchen/Bathroom and floors. It was miserable.

As soon as we could afford it we got a Cleaner - at first just to do the deep cleaning stuff but now we've increased her hours so she does all the laundry ironing and dishwasher etc. as well. It costs us £75 a week which is like a second food shop but worth every single penny. Less arguments, lovely clean house to come back to after work.

He11y · 21/04/2018 06:48

I am a cleaner and I’d have one myself if I could find the right person. Not all of my customers are wealthy or indeed working, people have cleaners for many different reasons.

I love the thought of coming home to a clean house - I provide that for others and often think how great it would be!

WorldWideWanderer · 21/04/2018 06:48

Years past I had a cleaner, I fancied having one so that I could spend more time with the children when they were young. She was very good and very helpful....I can see why people do it.

But she didn't last long. That's becuase I think I clean as well as anyone and better than most...!! I would always think I had to tidy up before she came (yes....I know) and then she would leave ornaments just slightly differently placed after she'd dusted than how they'd been before. As I'm incredibly fussy as to how I have things, I started to get tired of having to put everything back after she'd gone.

These days I wouldn't dream of having a cleaner simply because it isn't worth it....and besides, I'm quite happy doing my own cleaning, I don't really find it a chore.

adaline · 21/04/2018 06:59

Those saying you clean your own house (a 4 bed Semi???!) on top of full time work... I don't believe you have time for ANYTHING else then (or you think full time means 35 hours next door to your house and you don't have kids?). Why martyr yourself.

Eh? How long do you think cleaning takes? And if you're out of the house on your long 12 hour days, why does it require hours of upkeep?

We have a (gasp) two bed terrace and both work full-time. Cleaning takes maybe thirty minutes a day between us? Hardly taxing and martyrdom!

pilotswife · 21/04/2018 07:00

I’ve always had one and upped the hours when I was homeschooling as I loved walking in to a clean ordered house after a day out with the kids.
It freed me up to enjoy my children more and zero conflict about chores etc.
For me it’s a great investment in my wellbeing and something I would hate not to have.

Parker231 · 21/04/2018 07:03

We’ve had a cleaner our whole married life - the current one has been with us for 16 years and is amazing. We both work ft and have a busy life. She keeps the house clean, washing and ironing, sorts out the dry cleaning, is in for the Tesco’s shopping delivery, changes the beds, fills the freezer with lovely meals - basically makes life easier for us.