diffrence between an emotional affair and being freinds

[opionated]

what is? what is the diffrence between platonic friendship and having an emotional affair.

Secrecy. If you are messaging or meeting each other behind your partners backs then it’s crossed that line

having actual 'romantic ' or flirty / sexual interest in the person even if you don't physically do anything with them

And flirting.

Whether you would do/say what you do/say if your partner were in the room/watching/reading the messages.

A relationship that hasn't yet reached physical v no romantic intent

opinionated
Ah,come on you know

Secrecy as Herman says but also prioritisng the new person over your DP.
So things like making an effort to spend time with them but not making time for your DP, putting their needs first, being more emotionally available to them than you are your partner.

I think secrecy and also if you are getting something from it that you are lacking from your partner.

Staring into one another's eyes, wistfully holding hands while looking downcast, saying things like 'you know I wish things were different,' don't say it', etc etc

By some of your definitions planning your proposal would be cheating 😂

Desire

If your friends you can tell your partner about all of it.
If you don't tell your partner about the texts, conversations and if you meet up then it's an emotional affair.
If you share feelings and beliefs with someone instead of your partner. Want to tell them your personal thoughts not your partner then it's an emotional affair.
An emotional affair is having all the feelings of love and togetherness with someone. Sex is just expressing those feelings unless it's a one night stand.

If you've experienced it you'll know. You might not want to say it or admit it to yourself but you know deep down. Secrecy, making excuses to yourself, obsessive thoughts about the other person. It's very obvious when you're in it.

Do you love them love them? Emotional affair. Do you just love them? Friend.

I think it's a fine line. Secrecy is definitely a factor. But then again, you can be a very flirtatious character with a less so partner and whilst it isn't going anywhere, be more discreet in their presence.

For me, it is intent. If you are pursuing someone with the aim of some sort of gratification, then that is more than flirtation and crossing the line into adulterous behaviour.

Secrecy

To put it quite simply, if you speak to them/text them in a way you'd be embarrassed/ashamed/guilty about if your partner was in the room then it's an emotional affair.

Depends on the situation...

When you start confiding in them the way you would normally confide in a partner and you're excited when you know you're going to see them

For me it was when my partner started providing more support to his female friend than I was getting,

If this is about you then I think you know when your feelings cross the line.

What have you done opinionated ?

Does a monogamous relationship imply an emotional fidelity then?

no i have not one anything ive just had a conversation with someone that said she thought 2 people were having an emotional affair and i thought they were friends
that lead me on to wonder the difference between the 2 as i see it on mumsnet a lot