AIBU or are team building events really f*cking awful...

[rOsie80]

Especially the variety that ask you for an "interesting" fact about yourself so you all sit around and reel them off in an awkward, stilted fashion for an hour.... does anybody really enjoy this stuff ?!!

They are truly shit but massively effective in that nothing bonds a team more rapidly than a shared experience they all hate. I’ve had forced fun all over the world in 25 years of corporate life. My friends think I’m lucky but every time I’d rather be at home.

They are truly shit but massively effective in that nothing bonds a team more rapidly than a shared experience they all hate. I’ve had forced fun all over the world in 25 years of corporate life. My friends think I’m lucky but every time I’d rather be at home.

It obviously depends on the company re Family Day!

If I worked in a zoo (I don't) then it's a great day for everyone who wants to come.

Making this sort of thing effective rather than a total waste of money and time depends a lot on the type of industry people work in. I can see, for some workplaces, an advantage in eg attending talks by people who are outstanding in the specific industry and/or stuff about teaching you how to use new equipment or prepare for an industry-specific change.

But shitty, humiliating, physically risky, utterly pointless 'teambuilding' days are generally inflicted on cubicle mice, sales workers or people whose actual jobs are OK and even productive (think public sector/healthcare/teaching) but whose management are dumbfucks. In almost all such cases you would get more out of your staff if you paid them properly and treated them like human beings.

In almost all such cases you would get more out of your staff if you paid them properly and treated them like human beings.

Exactly - but such clear, straightforward thinking has been replaced by jargon, buzzwords and cheapskating in most organisations.

At mine team day the department was split into teams. I said I hope no one wants to win as I'm not competitive - that. Went. Down. Well

They should do this stuff at school where the age group and naivety are more suited.

They do. And my children hate them just as much as I do.

Although DD1 did thoroughly enjoy the evening her German set spent competing in a vocabulary competition and eating lots and lots of pizza. That is the sort of thing that does actually build a team.

Hate them! And role play. I can honestly say that I have never learnt or improve my work by taking part.

I am on my way to one now... Ffs... The nicest two days of the year and I have to spend it on this tripe not to mention the environmental impact of all the bloody post notes that get used at these events

We had a talk on effective speaking or something at a place I worked at once, not public speaking, this was "interpersonal relationships in the office". (I presume something had gone down which I didn't know about.)

The guy talked about "triangulation", that is, Person A asking Person C to tell Person B something instead of going straight to Person B themselves and how it was counterproductive etc.

I'm a friendly sort, my manager was not. I think the guy was scared of him because a couple of weeks after the event the guy sent ME an email asking me to ask my manager why his invoice hadn't been paid. I'm a nothing to do with payment of anything, he triangulated me himself!

They're always dreadful. I worked in one place and you had to share a room with s colleague.

Also the physical activity would be sheer hell for some people.

We've talked about doing a cookery one but our CE thinks they're a waste of time so "forgets" to organise it.

The thing is someone out there is making a killing selling these naff exercises. We're in the wrong job!

I find them patronising TBH.

We're in the wrong job!

I couldn't live with myself if I made a living from this tripe.

This'll probably out me.
Years ago I worked for a fool of a boss, who was very touchy feely and a total arse who loved team building, open your heart, share your feelings workshops.
Attendance was compulsory and there was much resentment. Anyway, we went to one and he'd drawn a giant human body on a flip chart and we had to relate staff members to this body, Sue on reception is the eyes, Sally the manager is the heart etc.
I couldn't resist it and wrote his name and a big arrow to the anus . I left shortly after.

The thing is someone out there is making a killing selling these naff exercises.

How ? Do they receive a %age of the profits improvement after they've struck ? Which is the only terms I'd hire them on.

Oh god I hate team building shite. And as for icebreakers....

Some years ago, I was at a meeting of the international company I worked for. We had the usual 'interesting facts about your group and tell the rest of the room' stuff. We found out that in our (assigned, so not self-selecting) group, we had one army pistol-shooting champion, one national level fencer (as in swords!) and one national level archer.

Nobody fucked with us on that little adventure {grin]

I figured the best way to ensure they aren't too bad is to get involved in organising, so can avoid anything too cringe making or strenuous. Mostly we have a lot of moving around our organisation, so spending a few hours every 6 months finding out who 30 new people are is actually productive, along with a bit of what does our team do now vs the teams next door, what are the big challenges coming up, right, let's look round this museum for a bit and then go to a nice pub that serves coffee and food too.

Did once go on one that was 4 days in an Outward bound type centre, which claimed they would be very inclusive of disability. They weren't. They thought watching activities would be inclusive. Then they got pissed off as these very intelligent civil servants completed all their activities a day and a half early. Management decided to dump us all in the woods with no food (and an insulin-dependent diabetic who'd been told we'd be back for lunch).
At that point we told the junior staff member we were hijacking his minibus and he said OK as long as we beat him up so he didn't get in trouble. Eventually got back (no lunch cooked), most of the centre staff walked out, and one gave us the key to the bar first. So we had a good couple days getting to know each other while the lawyers in the group drafted letters for the centre and got most of the cost back.

I don't do team-building exercises since I became a grown up. I do - talking to the people I work with

And role play... argghhh... stand up and share... arggghhh... I always say at the start of "team meetings" that I really do not do those - so it becomes more like - go to the toilet and disappear.

We once had to erect a tent while blindfolded.

I'd love to see a video of that.

Doesn't mean team building days aren't shit though!

We once had to erect a tent while blindfolded.

I had one where we had to pair up and one sighted guide a blindfolded partner through a "minefield" (cats cradle string and bangy things).

My partners first language was German, and under pressure her English got strained ... in the end I was calling in French (because my German is non existent).

We got scolded for "excluding the team" ....

This was the same event someone was dismissed from. Maybe they did themselves a favour

I have been subjected to this shit .

It was awful. Truly pointless. The only team building it achieved was that we were all united in how crap it was.

Oh god, a multi day one would be absolutely hideous!! No way would I want to share a room with a complete stranger. I can’t imagine anything worse.

Sometimes RL work is too much like The Office!

Just ghastly.