To have my 2 children share a bedroom?

[abstractlife]

We have just moved house. It's a bungalow with an attic that's been converted into 1 huuuuuge "master" bedroom and across the hall from that is a tiny low ceilinged room described as a study.

Downstairs there are 2 bedrooms or, as listed, 1 bedroom and 1 dining room/ bedroom.

We have decided to use the "dining room" as a playroom and the other one as our bedroom.

Upstairs we have given the big room to DS1 who is 6 and DS2, who is coming up for 2, is in the "study" with a view to them sharing when DS2 is a bit older.

The room is too big for our needs in a bedroom plus I like them being upstairs mainly because we stay up later and don't want to disturb them plus, sometimes, we leave for work very early so, again, I don't want them disturbed.

I'm just not sure them sharing is fair on them and I'm concerned that it could be a disaster.

For those of you whose children share a room, how do you get it to work? Any tips?

I'm confused how sharing a room is seen as some kind of hardship. Lots of children share. Although saying that it was a night mare when I was younger and I use to share with my sister. If we fell out she would refuse to let me in the room and I would have to sleep downstairs on the sofa. (My mum never done anything about it.) so sometimes it doesn't work out.

I would use the large one as your bedroom, even if it is "too big" and allow the other two rooms as there's. I understand your reasoning, but at 6+ having someone move into your room could feel like an intrusion. And i'd value separate bedrooms (especially as different sexes and as your son hits puberty, for his own privacy) more than I would a play room.

Oops I read as DD2! But what I said still stands

My 2 are 7 and 3.5 & desperate for bunk beds and to share. Am planning to move them over the summer with a view that in 4-5 years when dd1 wants her own space they can have the 2 x big bedrooms and I'll have the smaller room (still a decent sized double).
I think you need to do it sooner rather than later if ds1 already sees the attic as his though.

My boy/girl twins are 9 and given the slightest chance they share one of their bedrooms, due to chattering we limit this to weekends/holidays nowadays. They think any restrictions on sharing are unfair!

I think it's the sensible thing to do. But we have 3 double bedrooms and one teeny tiny box room that only fits a single bed and nothing else. Us parents in the smallest double, 10 year old in another, 4 year old another, toddler has just moved into the tiny room from our room in a cot. When toddler outgrows the cot I plan to have them with the 4 year old. I mentioned this to my mother and she was horrified and said it was wrong. I think she meant boy/girl?l sharing is wrong, as she certainly had same sex siblings sharing. They'll be 5 and 2 most likely. can't see what's wrong with sharing. I think humans sleep better with others.

I'm bemused by the idea that the definition of affording a child isn't about food and clothes, activities etc, its about ensuring they never have to share a room with anyone else because its so harmful and damaging, despite the fact that most working class adults did, and many middle class adults would have. What happens if you have twins in a 2 bed? Sell off the noisiest?

Nothing wrong sharing a room but it sounds like it would be problematic with your two. In your situation I'd keep them separate but get some good, possibly lockable, toy storage for their bedrooms.

Can't be doing with this whinging of "it's unfair for children to share"

Unfair is not enough food or no roof at all.

It is FINE for children to share a bedroom. When they hit 11 or so, then look at privacy for them

my boys (8&6) share one room and my girls (6&2) share another. it will stay that way until they move out. they love sharing at the moment. Currently the boys are in the smaller room with bunks and the girls in a double room but once DS1 is a teen i expect we will swap them so the boys can have individual beds and DD2 will be old enough to go on the top bunk in the smaller room.

we have a study which we could make into a bedroom if we really need to but we would rather not.

I would say do it sooner than later, it will be much harder to do if they have got used to having their own room and you take it away.

i'm hoping that sharing will help them focus their mind on saving to move out! don't want them to be too comfortable here and never leave like my DBro did to my parents

We have three bedrooms but the small one is an office at the mo. Both children share the big master bedroom with bunk beds (DD is 8yo, nearly 9 and DS is 2, nearly 3). DH and I are in the 2nd bedroom. The age gap works well as DS is too young to play upstairs unaccompanied, so DD tends to play in the bedroom. She has high shelves and cupboards with child proof locks to put her stuff in. They're only there together when asleep.

We will want to split them up when DD starts secondary school, just so she has her own space, but it seems fine for now. They've been sharing about a year or so.

We bought bunk beds that can convert into a single bed and high sleeper (so the high sleeper could ultimately go in the little bedroom that's currently an office). The furniture is all modular and we bought enough that it can be split between two rooms in the future. It's all in neutral colours too. Hopefully we can afford an attic conversion and keep the office!

My sister and I had separate bedrooms and then my brother was born. My sister and I shared for a bit but we used to fight so were separated
I then had to share with my brother for YEARS as my sister didn't want to share with me. That only changed when we moved to a2 bed house and we had to share. Brother slept in parents room. I think all told I shared with him until I was about 12 ish? I remember once I had to go to bed at the same time as him so he would settle as he didn't like being on his own and I missed my favorite tv programme. Still annoys me now.
When we were in a 3 bed I shared with my sister until she left home and got married.
When I moved and my children had separate rooms, the twins used to sneak into each others room as they missed each other!

We have just moved into a three bed. It’s a 3 story house and we have the master with ensuite and my older son has the biggest bedroom (which is massive). He has reapeatedly asked if his brother (still a baby yet) can share his room with him and whilst that’s not possible right now and the baby still needs me at night, we have said when the baby is 3 (big one will be 6) we will ask them if they’d like to share. If they do then we will convert the small 3rd bedroom into a chill out games room (Xbox, PlayStation, leapfrog system etc) with a tv and a sofa bed. They can also use it to store their board games and it’s provably where we will keep things like the jigsaw tables etc.
However, asking them is the key in all this. I seriously think you need to ask if your children want to share a room!

In your shoes I would have them share the master room but also assign the small room to them with a comfy sofa and bookcase in...then the older one has a separate space if he wants it.

It's not ideal for them to share at the moment as DS2 is not the best at going to bed! And wakes up frequently crying

In that case no I don't think it's fair on your older child as they're going to have their sleep disturbed which will affect their ability to concentrate at school. Younger one should be in with you or elsewhere until they're sleeping through.

Good for the age, maybe when they're teens they will want their own space though and when they're teens you can let them use the two downstairs rooms and you move upstairs. Sorted.

My DD has the biggest room in the house and the plan was that DS would move in with her... problem is, now she's been there 4 years, there's no room at all for any of his stuff so I don't know how to move him in.... he's in the the smallest room which is a quarter the size of hers!

As both kids sleep in our bed given half the chance , we've done nothing about it! Ridiculous to live in a 4 bed house and sleep 4 to a bed (plus the cat!) !!

Gosh. I've 2 teenagers and a 6 year old in one room. I'm sure yours will be fine.

It used to be the normal thing for siblings to share. It isn't as if they are going to be locked in there 24/7, one can play in the playroom and one in the bedroom or lounge and they can go to bed in the bedroom.

My two dc, both boys, 3yrs age difference share a room.
Youngest doesn’t sleep amazingly, but ds1 just sleeps through it now he’s used to it.
They have the bigger room (2bed house) and beds close enough that they can see each other. The bigger one adores sharing with ds2, he says it makes him less lonely and likes to play with his brother in the morning.

So based on my own experience of two sharing, I’d say do it. Why should one get a huuuuuge room and the other not? I think it would cause more issues as they get older the disparity between their rooms and make them less willing to share

if it's huge why not partition it? turn the little room up there into a bathroom?

I think it is positive to share - they get used to proper sharing, being considerate of others and being kind to siblings - get to do story time together and get company at night - I loved sharing although I had my own room for a bit we went back to sharing as we got older

Ffs!! Since when did sharing a room become a hardship for children.

This, bloody hell. My DS and DS (14 & 19) share. It's fine, what's the hard ship?

DS & DSS