To Give up on driving?

[Louiseob33]

I passed my test 9 years ago.
Bought a car and drove for 3 weeks then stopped as I was too nervous.
I worried about stalling and getting into gears and I was a nervous wreck.
I’ve booked automatic lesson for next week but now my dad is saying I still won’t be able to drive.
I would love to be able for o drive.
Shall I give up or have a go?

Of course you should! You did it before you can do it again! Good luck!

I’m hoping a auto might help me concentrate on the road rather than worry about gears and stalling.

Ignore your dad.

Have a lesson.

Go out a few times either when it is quiet or an empty carpark after Sunday closing to get used to it.

Once you've got a few miles under your belt, your confidence will grow.

Don’t give up. I passed my test 12 years ago and didn’t drive until recently. I was like you with changing gears etc. I now have an automatic. I’m still a bit nervous especially about parking but I make sure I leave early so I’m not under pressure. I have an automatic car and it’s so much better. I just took the car out one day and I haven’t looked back. Good luck xx

I think you should try but if you still find it too stressful then don't bother. Hardly anyone needs to drive. I think it's better if we have fewer cars on the road anyway.

Is a auto easier?
Is it just a case of stop and go?

I’ve booked automatic lesson for next week but now my dad is saying I still won’t be able to drive

Gosh, I can't imagine why you'd be lacking in confidence... You passed your test, that means you have the coordination etc required to drive a car and just need some practice and confidence. And to ignore your dad

It would be better if I drived in the winter getting to school etc.
Doing the food shop.
Would be so much more convenient

*if I drove

Absolutely go for it. Automatic will be easier. There's enough to worry about with driving without the extra stress of the gears.

Can't for the life of me imagine why your father would think his atttidue is helpful.

Good luck OP!

I actually past first time with only 1 minor but my nerves were shot.
Everyone just drives so fast

I haven’t tried an automatic but it was 10 years after I passed my test before I had my own car, take some more lessons, manual or automatic and I’m sure you will be ok. It takes a while to become confident and there’s no replacement for experience and that just takes time and you being comfortable being cautious until then Good luck

Automatics are amazing. You move the gear stick to D for Drive. Then they are literally a gas pedal and a brake. That's it.
When you stop you put it in P for Park. You don't have to do hill starts and you can't really stall it. I think if you improve your confidence in an automatic you could then try a manual later if you wanted to.
I can drive manual and have owned manuals but I love our automatic

I passed my test last year (after putting off having lessons for years). I found the first 6-12 weeks horrible, I couldn't get used to driving my own car and how different it was from the one I learnt in. I only drove around the local area for a couple of hours every few days (single parent and wanted to do it when I had child care so DD wasn't with me) and would mentally plan the journey. It seemed that every time I went out there was a near miss, sometimes my fault othertimes the people around me.

Fast forward a year later, and I jump in my car and drive without even thinking about it now, my reactions are faster, I can preempt other road users better now I am more experienced. I can reroute a journey quickly due to traffic or road closures etc. Being able to go on days out and just nipping to the supermarket and putting the shopping inn the car instead of carrying/bussing/taxiing makes it all worth it.

The best thing I did was practice, and buy a satnav even around your local area having the satnav giving instructions like an instructor is reassuring.

A driving examiner has said you are safe to drive so of course you can drive, it's just practise and confidence that you need.

I changed to an automatic about eight years ago and would never, ever go back. It's a completely different driving experience. Go for it, OP, it will transform your life.

Thanks everyone.
It’s nice to hear postitive comments.
I think without the worry of stalling it will give me confidence to move off on roundabouts more efficiently.
I’m excited to try some lessons.
Although £37 a lesson...will have to be 1 a week only.

Do sat navs tell you which lane?
(Sorry if that’s a obvious question)

Indeed if you passed your test, the examiner thinks you are a safe driver

Don't listen to your dad, is he a driving instructor or test examiner. Thought not.

You won't need many lessons.

Well, isn’t your dad a peach? Ignore him and go for it.

I can remember all the road signs/speed limits.
Although I do get confused on the huge roundabouts when it tells you which lane.
One in particular is a right exit but it starts right and then half way around is further left then your in the left lane.

Have a go. Have some lessons and get your confidence back definitely.

I know you have passed but bear with me. I started learning to drive in 2006. I failed a test in 2007 and gave up for a few years. I failed again in 2010 and again, gave up for a few years. In the end I failed 4 times over 10 years, each time not driving again for about 2 years and telling myself I'll never drive. I finally passed in February.

Something just changed. I got an instructor who suited me and who didn't pander to my anxieties he just let me get on with it and we didn't really talk much other than the odd bit of banter and laughing at me haha. Other instructors would sort of try to psychoanalyse me and make it all worse in my mind, which was something I hadn't realised. I was so nervous every time I got into a car and even on the day of the test the examiner said afterwards I was 'as high as a kite' with anxiety.

Now I've been driving for 2 months and all the 10 years worth of anxiety has started to melt away. I watched a lot of videos on Youtube about things I was unsure of. LearntodriveTravis was a great one and I also watched a hypnotherapy session on there too .

What is it about it that bothers you and makes you nervous, is it just the changing gears? For me it was the fear of crashing and injuring my children/someone else and it would play on my mind then make changing gears etc clunky because I was so nervous. It wasn't really changing gears at all I just thought it was.

Please don't listen to your dad, he is totally out of order. A dad is meant to support you in your choices, not tell you you can't do something. I'm sorry he's being that way. Prove him wrong!

Yes, satnavs can tell you the lane to get in. I live in Norfolk so have never done any motorway driving so can't comment on that but it's good on dual carriageways and most country roads, sometimes it gets confused and tells you to make a turn into a field though

Also I use Google Maps on my phone everywhere I go and that really helps, although I have been known to shout profanities and tell it to shut up at times when it takes me crazy ways but it's definitely good if you're nervous about getting lost.

Really recommend auto. Just takes away one aspect of driving so you can focus on other things