To not want updates from the person you have sold a pet to?

[AskinginApril]

Is this unreasonable?

Needs more detail.

A quick text with a photo of Fido looking happy a couple of times a year, quite nice.

Photos every day of Fido eating his breakfast, sleeping in his new basket, riding in the car etc etc and you being expected to respond every time, not so much!

Of course it's not unreasonable. If you don't want updates, you don't want updates. I fail to see why anyone else would care about whether you want updates or not.

I sent updates of the rabbit we had for free off someone. They've stopped replying to them now though so I won't send anymore.

@PancakeBum
Why would you burden a rescue centre with extra kittens when its your own damn fault you didn't spay your cat and allowed them to reproduce freely.
Why would an already overrun rescue centre even accept a kitten thats clearly in a good, clean home that can provide for them until they are found a new home?

"Why not give it to a rescue then?"

Because who wants much loved pet-or any animal- to spend time confused and scared-in a rescue when it could go straight home with a new family?

I got my dog 3 years ago from a family and still regularly send them videos and photos. they love seeing them.

Because who wants much loved pet-or any animal- to spend time confused and scared-in a rescue when it could go straight home with a new family?

unfortunately many families do, we have had four pets from a rescue centre where the people who provided foster care did their best but it was sadly inadequate for the animals - social, herd animals kept alone for starters. We now have 5 pets (and a chaotic house) who have company but all were terrified of people when we got them because they had lacked human contact - one hadn't been handled for 3 years until he went to a rescue centre.

Depends. Obviously we need more details than you’ve given.

I assume it’s your updates that have been rejected?

This could be a litter of kittens and someone is sending the op updates about it. It doesn't say it was a beloved family pet she's had years. I bought a kitten off someone and she kept asking how it was. I found it annoying tbh although I did reply. But I was glad when she stopped messaging me.

Why not give it to a rescue then?

Because some people prefer to find new owners themselves.

I gave my dog away to an owner in the countryside 9 years ago (I got her way too young and irresponsible!) still beat myself up. I loved the updates I got, lived for them until I lost his contact details (my phone and laptop were stolen and this was before the cloud etc) I always kept looking for him to see how she was. I fear I may be too late now :(

Because rescues are charities who don’t need burdening with more animals that don’t need rescuing.

YANBU - just tell them if you don't want updates if it upsets you.

We rehomed a dog from a family and they were really sad to see him go. There is nothing wrong with rehoming a dog rather than going through a shelter as this would be less traumatic for the dog and you can see they are going to a loving home.

Why not give it to a rescue then?

Lots of rescues have waiting lists before they'll take an animal in, which can be a problem if you're in a situation where you really can't have the animal for any longer.

I agree that lots of people would like this - the woman whose cat we rehomed wanted text updates for the first couple of months, and given how devastated she was to lose him it seemed the only kind thing to do - but if you don't want them just say something like 'So pleased to see s/he has settled in - please don't feel you have to keep updating me, s/he's yours now and I find it a bit upsetting.', OR just don't reply. I can't imagine they're planning to keep this up for the rest of the animal's life, in any case, so it will tail off, probably quite soon.

Both of our current rescue dogs were in foster care before we got them. The foster carer of the first one was debating whether to keep the dog herself because she had got so attached. After we took her I kept getting phone calls to check on her (photos on phones not so common then). It annoyed me. She was my dog now and I stopped picking up the calls after a while. I bump into the other foster carer in the park every now and then and she loves to see how well the dog is doing.
But it depends totally on the circumstances you sold the dog. Not unreasonable if it is upsetting you to receive these.

I became a new guinea pig(s) owner last year. We paid for two boys when a teenager had grown bored with them. I later found out that some snake owners take 'free' rehomes to feed to their snakes live - hence a charge.

If you dont want updates OP, you don't want updates so I'd politely tell them

Personally I think the odd update once in a blue mood would be lovely but depending on circumstances, or actually it doesn't matter if you don't want them

The person I bought one of my cats from remembers his birthday on Facebook every year and I send the odd photo of him too.

Oh dear. Is it a horse? I still send updates to my horse's previous owner.

I think it’s lovely. I had to rehome a pet a couple of years ago when my living situation changed and we were unfortunately no longer able to keep them. I found new owners myself through a Facebook page dedicated to these particular animals and met a lovely lady who already had several and wanted to expand her ‘family’. I was gutted to see them go and she has been fantastic, every few months she would send a couple of pictures of how well they were doing and I was very grateful. I haven’t heard from her in over a year now but she’s had them over 2 and is totally their owner now, not me. I really appreciated the messages to know they were okay though.

My dd still sends updates to.her pony’s previous owner-and we’ve had her for 10 years. When we recently thought we were going to lose her, the previous owner asked if she could come to say goodbye.......

Wonderfully vague OP

I adopted a cat from a lady who had to give get up due a new baby reserving judgement on that one I sent an update a few days later to show she had settled in and that she was being well looked after and loved.

If I was in the unlikely situation that my cats are being rehomed (there's no way they would be sold) then I would like updates on them if possible but as I would have gone via proper channels and not Facebook or whatever I doubt I would do

My DM rescued a dog & sent the home updates for years, everything from photos to his progress reports with the trainer (he was v problematic to start with). After 3 years they handed over the chip details as she's done such a great job, the first time they had done this apparently in 100+ dogs. I thought it was lovely for both sides.

But if it upsets you, ask them to stop. They are doing this for you not them.

I have adopted a dog, I added the previous owner on FB, and sent her texts for the first month or two.

She was extremely grateful, giving up her dog was not what she wanted to do. She thanked me so much for my messages x

Pancake it's wise to ask for money so as to not attract the wrong people. Even the rspca tell you to ask for money to attract genuine good people