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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

is this rude from potential nanny?

95 replies

beclev24 · 05/04/2018 01:31

I put an ad on a job site for a part time nanny. I invited one woman to come for an i/v on Friday. She replied that she couldn't remember responding to my job ad and if I wanted her to come for an interview I would need to pay her. otherwise she would talk to me on the phone for free. I had never heard of this before, but maybe it's common??

Then we were going back and forth about the timing of the interview/ phonecall. in hte course of these texts she said she was working with antoehr family a couple of blocks away from me today. So I asked if she wanted to stop by our place after she finished for 15 mins to meet me/ the kids. She replied "

No. I do not want to come to your house for 15 mins. I have been working with a two year old since 8.30am. I have plans with my boyfriend tonight. I can talk on the phone briefly.

This felt a bit abrasive and rude for someone trying to get a job? I thought she could have just said- sorry I'm busy tonight, can we try for Friday or whatever. So I told her htat I didint' think . it would work out. Was I unreasonable ? i'm a good and generous employer generally but don't like bad 'attitude'. Was I unreasonable? Generally curious.

OP posts:
thisappisrubbish · 06/04/2018 17:33

This sounds like someone I would definitely not want to employ.

PieAndPumpkins · 06/04/2018 17:50

Can you imagine dealing with that attitude every time you asked something of her?! Lucky escape, for sure.

nannygoat50 · 06/04/2018 17:50

As a nanny myself I think she is rude and ignorant and think you have had a lucky escape

Ellyess · 06/04/2018 17:52

beclev24 Please just make her come round for an interview then, in a sickly sweet voice, go down a list of all the things she's done that make her so unemployable and tell her to go away!

MumsGoneToYonderLand · 06/04/2018 17:52

move on and find someone worth your time.

Viviennemary · 06/04/2018 17:54

She sounds absolutely horrendous. You've thought it over and don't think she'd be suitable or another applicant is coming for interview so you'll let her know.

Puffycat · 06/04/2018 17:55

Oh she sounds just like Mary Poppins. If you don’t employ her please pass me her details I can just see her being the one I’d like to entrust my children’s well-being, safety and general growth to.

Come on! She’s a total nightmare! Tell her to sod off, you wouldn’t even give her an interview if she crawled over broken glass!

Viviennemary · 06/04/2018 17:56

I see you've already put her off. 100% the right thing to have done.

Qwertytypewriter · 06/04/2018 18:03

OP, it may be worth brushing up on general assertiveness skills before you employ any nanny, I'm a bit concerned that you were even thinking about continuing a dialogue with someone who started out by demanding money to even come for interview. It's quite likely there will be times when you have to tell any nanny that you don't like something they've done, I don't mean it unkindly, but you sound rather compliant and meek.

Smudge100 · 06/04/2018 18:08

I can’t believe you’re even asking. I wouldn’t employ someone like that to weed my garden, let alone look after my child!

peacheachpearplum · 06/04/2018 18:09

I've never employed a nanny but if I was looking for one I don't think I'd be interested in her. As Ineke says I would expect a prospective nanny to want to see the children and parents as it is as much a choice for her as you. Surely she wouldn't expect you to offer her a job without meeting her?

sonjadog · 06/04/2018 18:10

The point you should have stopped it was when she wanted to be paid for the interview. It´s not good that you were prepared to continue with an interview after that. I suggest you think a bit more about who you want to employ and what signs you are looking for at the application stage that this person is going to be a good employee.

Ellie56 · 06/04/2018 18:14

Why would you even want to interview someone so rude never mind actually employ her? You definitely dodged a bullet there. Hmm

MumofBoysx2 · 06/04/2018 18:15

She's being rude, and difficult. Imagine if she were working for you?! Treat it as a warning not to hire her!

Bugjune · 06/04/2018 18:17

What a fucking horror!

Turquoise123 · 06/04/2018 18:22

Have to say that she does not sound like a professional nanny. No nanny agency ever even mentioned to me paying for an interview so I can't think where she got this idea from .

I have never paid for an interview but I always insisting on paying for the trial day - I think some nannies find it difficult to ask for this so I always insisted .

PattiStanger · 06/04/2018 18:26

I'm surprised at you had an ongoing conversation with her, you're under no obligation to consider her.

Language barrier or no if you're not happy you're not happy to carry on speaking to her, move on to the next candidate.

Petrify · 06/04/2018 18:27

Tell her get lost x

TestingTestingWonTooFree · 06/04/2018 18:30

She was rude.

DianaPrincessOfThemyscira · 06/04/2018 18:32

I don’t even know why you continued the conversation tbh. If someone ever says they don’t recall applying again, just reply with a “sorry, my mistake” and hang up.

halfwitpicker · 06/04/2018 18:33

Crikey she sounds like the real deal.

ferntwist · 06/04/2018 18:35

Yikes. She sounds mean. I don't think she would be kind to your children. You've had a lucky escape!

Babyplaymat · 06/04/2018 18:36

I think you need to point out that with her attitude you are not interested in pursuing anything further.

minniebirdy · 06/04/2018 18:39

Don’t even think about employing anybody with such a bad attitude which she will
Impart to your children

Findingdotty · 06/04/2018 18:40

Do you seriously think this woman would make a good and caring nanny for your children?