AIBU? Child maintenance

[Daffodils78]

AIBU to ask for £30-£50 a week child maintenance for one biological child and one step child. No extras, like uniforms or clubs, that would be for everything except one (maybe two) days with Dad, so whatever he spends then.

Would be an out of court settlement. He often earns more than that on the calculator, but might have to take a lower paid job temporarily. I would not expect this to fluctuate even if his earnings do due to seasons, etc.

He has asked for a sum, and I don't want to suggest anything ludicrous but neither do I want my kids going short. I don't want him to struggle, either.

AIBU? Or does that sound about right? Thanks

I normally take a hard stand on matters relating to CM but as he seems to be very caring towards BOTH DC I would ask him what he is happy to pay and as long as it is a fair amount and reasonable then go for it. A loving Father is not to be sniffed at as there really are so many dickhead Dads about!

But daffodils statistically a lot of second marriages fail. Imagine the actual parent was still on the scene, then the step parent, then possibly another future step parent - how complicated would that get if they all automatically had legal ties to the DC just by virtue of being with the mother (or father) for a few years? What if the step parent turned out to be abusive and the parent had to actively fight to remove that person from their child's life? In cases such as yours where it's amicable enough to want contact to continue then people can sort it between themselves without the law.

I think £50-60 for his own child is fair, I wouldn't bring the step-child into it.

My DP has a child with his ex - she also has a child from a previous relationship and the father has never been involved. So, every time DPs child comes to stay, we take other DC too. Buy birthday and Christmas presents etc. but he doesn't pay maintenance for that child, only his biological child.

I think I will probably go with the child maintenance calculator for 1 child and then say if he wants to get birthday/xmas/easter things he can of his own volition. Probably simpler that way.

Why are you so against claiming from the bio Dad? Just because he isn't on the birth certificate, doesn't mean you can't claim?

I think its irrelevant tbh, but I wouldn't get a penny as he was in prison last thing I heard