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AIBU?

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Original poster

Reasons why curtains should be opened ...

216 replies

crimboAkimbo · 23/03/2018 14:09

I've been trying for several years to train my teen to open his bedroom curtains in the mornings. It's not a huge issue, but I don't think it's an unreasonable thing to aspire to is it?

Thing is, his bedroom is at the back of the house and he doesn't go in it much between getting dressed in the morning and getting undressed at the end of the day. So, being in possession of a hyper-logical teenage brain, he just doesn't see the point.

Whenever this comes up (regularly) I have to go round the "but why?" loop, so I trot out the same old arguments - it's the respectable thing to do, it's good training for the future when you're living with other people, it's simple and I've asked you to do it so why not, it's my house and my rules, no play-station till they're open, etc etc. However, clearly none of these arguments are clinching enough to drive a permanent change of habit.

Any advice? (I know I will get "stop worrying about it and give him a break" but I'm hoping for some more positive steers too).

OP posts:
Mrscog · 23/03/2018 15:22

I think pick your battles on this one! If you want them open then open them, but not worth any sort of fight!

WhatToDoAboutWailmerGoneRogue · 23/03/2018 15:24

I think the reason that you are struggling to find a good reason for this is because there isn't really one. It's just a preference you have. I don't really understand the reasons you have listed here tbh. Respectful? Good practice for when you live with others? What?

Absolutely this. I never open my curtains.

BugsyMcGee · 23/03/2018 15:25

When I was that slovenly teen in my first flat, I never opened my bedroom curtains.

I got a lovely payback for being so idle.

I had created a moisture trap between curtain and window which proved to be the perfect habitat for festering black mould and a truly epic colony of horrible little white mites. They mites did not stay there though, they were crawling all over everything.

I got a very bad bug phobia from that which destroyed several years of my life and still affects me somewhat today.

Make him open them or take them down.

MsHarry · 23/03/2018 15:25

How do you open windows then if you never open curtains?

EasterBunBun · 23/03/2018 15:25

I now have a vision of many Mumsnetters padding around in gloomy hobbit houses, curtains never opened from one year's end to the next Confused

He's teenager, it's their natural habitat- but it is also your house and it's not an unreasonable request.

WhatToDoAboutWailmerGoneRogue · 23/03/2018 15:27

How do you open windows then if you never open curtains?

I rarely do that either, but on the occasions windows are open I move them apart slightly and close them again. It’s really not that complicated Confused

TerfsUp · 23/03/2018 15:27

Sunlight is a good disinfectant. (Not sure if that's true but it sounds good.)

MsHarry · 23/03/2018 15:28

Its very unhygienic though! Confused

MsHarry · 23/03/2018 15:28

It is Terf and is why bedding should be dried outside when possible.

WhatToDoAboutWailmerGoneRogue · 23/03/2018 15:29

Its very unhygienic though!

In your opinion. Not in mine.

MsHarry · 23/03/2018 15:29

No but mine is right! Grin

NWQM · 23/03/2018 15:31

Take em down. My Mum did. Mine went back up and I opened them every day from then. Our kids stayed down and wasn't embarrassed by the fact they were closed. We were at the front and I get now why it bothered her.

I get too now that she was getting them cleaned and was just using a bit of dramatic license.

She was good, very good my Mum Smile looking back

WhatToDoAboutWailmerGoneRogue · 23/03/2018 15:31

No but mine is right!

Of course you think your opinion is right, just like I think my opinion is right.

Tawdrylocalbrouhaha · 23/03/2018 15:32

I now have a vision of many Mumsnetters padding around in gloomy hobbit houses, curtains never opened from one year's end to the next

Me too! Creepy.

panetonnebraxton · 23/03/2018 15:34

I'm with your son on this one. Don't see why it matters.

windchimesabotage · 23/03/2018 15:37

my gran was obsessed with curtains being opened and shut at the right times. She used to go in my room and draw all the curtains and it used to take me ages to sort them back out since there was a complicated situation with voile drapes I had going on. It really really wound me up. As a result id never tell my son to drawn his curtains if he didnt want to... i mean at the end of the day why should he? Maybe as an adult he will embrace having his curtains open... but if he wants to be a teenage boy in the dark like many of them do i dont see why he cant just be left to get on with it really? Its not exactly a health hazard altho i suppose you could make a tenuous link about mould... but thats not entirely true is it... ive never got mould from not drawing curtains often enough

MrsTerryPratchett · 23/03/2018 15:37

it's the respectable thing to do, it's good training for the future when you're living with other people, it's simple and I've asked you to do it so why not, it's my house and my rules, no play-station till they're open, etc etc.

There are all bollocks arguments so you will lose. Basically they are 'social norms blah blah blah' and 'do as I say'.

Open windows and curtains to air and prevent mold.

panetonnebraxton · 23/03/2018 15:38

The reason I open curtains is because I like natural light. But if he doesn't care about it, I wouldn't care. It's his bedroom, after all. Not like I'm spending any time in there.

It's like my Mum made all of us "make our beds" every morning when we were growing up, which basically meant straightening up the sheet, pillow and duvet, etc.

As an adult I've never done it. Nobody goes in our bedroom or sees it apart from me and OH, so I don't see the need to have a nicely laid out duvet. I'm just gonna get under it and mess it up again the next night. Totally pointless.

AcrossthePond55 · 23/03/2018 15:38

I don't live in a damp climate so mould isn't an issue. I didn't care if my DSs opened their curtains or not. Their bedrooms are upstairs so I never noticed. I'd have them open the windows to air the rooms out once a week though. I found if I left the curtains up to them, they were more cooperative when I asked them to air their rooms.

We open our curtains downstairs most days because we like the view (live in the country). But if it's cold or hot we leave them closed as we have insulated drapes. The house stays more comfortable that way.

junebirthdaygirl · 23/03/2018 15:43

When l see my dss curtains closed l feel we are going down a slippery slope and soon we will be living in a pigsty. Total exaggeration l know but tthats the impact it has on me. I like all curtains open first thing. Sometimes if l'm away my dh leaves curtains closed and when l park outside l want to drive off as its so depressing seeing all the curtains closed in the middle of the day. But as said pick your battles with teens. He will copy what he has seen in a few years. Meantime open them or text..CURTAINS!!! That works best with mine.

rach01pink · 23/03/2018 15:45

I only ever keep curtains closed if I am ill and under a duvet. I go round and open all curtains in the morning to let the light in and embrace the fresh new day. . my 6 year old is fully trained to make his bed and open his curtains when he gets up.. However I appreciate a teenager is a whole new experience.....

AnnieAnoniMouser · 23/03/2018 15:47

I want to go into those houses with a couple of table lamps and show them what a difference soft lighting makes

I know what difference soft light makes, and that’s exactly why the Big Light is on. I hate anything other that bright light. My Dad used to say ‘It’s like a bloody operating theatre in here!’ 😂. Each to their own, I won’t tell you how to light your house, if you don’t presume to tell me how to light mine.

EmmaGrundyForPM · 23/03/2018 15:48

Has he recently ht the terrible teens? In which case you have a lot of far more serious differences of opinion ahead!

Pick your battles.

I'd say this one really isn't worth it

AnnieAnoniMouser · 23/03/2018 15:51

I’d tell him he has the choice of opening them every morning or having them removed.

He’s been asked nicely, he won’t keep it up, so put your foot down.

I hate the natural light being obscured by anything, closed curtains are depressing.

MsHarry · 23/03/2018 15:52

Annie you don't like candlelight dinners then? You prefer to sit under a strip light ?